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Cowtown Charlie

Updated on April 11, 2020

By: Wayne Brown

Dirty Lil’ Charlie came down to old Cowtown

Ask about our women, wanted to look a bit around

I took him to the stockyards, to Filthy McNasty’s

Tried to get him an oil change, straighten out his chassis

Charlie commenced to move in on them cowgirls

Got ‘em on the dance floor and gave them all a whirl

Headed to the parkin’ lot with one to get a bit of honey

She quickly knocked him in the head; took all his money

Dazed and broke Charlie stumbled back in the place

Took bout five minutes and he was back into the chase

Soon he was headed for that lot to cop a little feel

She kicked him in the groin when no money was there to steal

Charlie crawled back into the bar his hair all mess

His crotch was a bit sore; his manhood up in his chest

But he dived right back in and went for yet another one

Dirty Lil’ Charlie it seems was still having fun

Now this one ole gal she spotted him from the other side

She strolled over to our table and in a chair she did slide

She looked at Lil’ Charlie and said we don’t have to meet

Don’t you remember me? I’m the one on the dozer seat!

Well the hair stood on his neck and Charlie pricked up his ears

Told that he never dreamed of her in less than a thousand years

Said he’d like to spend more time with her and chew the old fat

But he had to see the eye doctor cause she was prettier on the Cat

Now as we ran from McNasty’s her shouts were all we heard

She cussed ol’ Charlie from the rafters and was flippin us the bird

Dirty Lil’ Charlie just took all in stride and offered one last ‘cheers’

Then stuck his head back in the door and yelled aloud…up yours!

I cannot go to McNasty’s anymore they’ve thrown my ass out

Claimed that guy from Knockemstiff caused the girls to pout

So I’m just here at home drinkin’ beer; a- wishin’ I had a Harley

I could it ride to McNasty’s if not for that Dirty Lil’ Charlie!

©Copyright WBrown2010. All Rights Reserved

This content is accurate and true to the best of the author’s knowledge and is not meant to substitute for formal and individualized advice from a qualified professional.

© 2010 Wayne Brown


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    • Wayne Brown profile imageAUTHOR

      Wayne Brown 

      10 years ago from Texas

      @lalesu...Laura, see what happens when you get too focused on Twinkies and Snickers Bars! Ya miss the good stuff...but the vodka should fix that!LOL! If you missed this woman I would recommend that you also look at "Charlie's Woman" which is probably another one you missed from that era. WB

    • lalesu profile image


      10 years ago from south of the Mason-Dixon

      How did I miss this? Where was I? Oh yeah...a bit tied up with snickers bars and full moons, lol. Very funny stuff and, well, she who laughs last...I know, I know, completely out of context, but it's after midnight, there's vodka involved and I'm inclined to skew a phrase to fit my purpose from time to time, haha! Keep it up boys! ~ Laura

    • Wayne Brown profile imageAUTHOR

      Wayne Brown 

      11 years ago from Texas

      @lorlie6...Thanks much for the promotion on my poetry. They'll probably send a committee over with a cease & desist letter! LOL

      @ralwus...I am checking with the local community college Charlie to see if perhaps they have linguist who can assist. Can you write southern style? LOL WB

      @rkhyclak...I guess ol' Charlie justs brings out the best in me bekka. I've known that ever since I read "I Never Fart On Sunday" the first time. I remember thinking..."Now, here's a guy with class, like me!" LOL! WB

    • rkhyclak profile image


      11 years ago from Ohio

      You two are nuts, but I'm enjoying it! Also looking forward to 50's contribution :)

    • profile image


      11 years ago

      You still haven't figure my poem out? LOL Jibberish to you. Good, then I'll do more like that one.

    • lorlie6 profile image

      Laurel Rogers 

      11 years ago from Bishop, Ca

      I just knew who lil' Charlie was, from the very start. Wayne, you're really quite the poet-I offered your name up yesterday on the forums as a poet that needs more attention!

      Hope you don't mind.

    • Wayne Brown profile imageAUTHOR

      Wayne Brown 

      11 years ago from Texas're right CC....especially if 50 goes for that crutch he referred to. You can't just have your hat on, you better lock it on! WB

    • profile image


      11 years ago

      Oh boy Wayne! Looks like we've had it now. Dusty is in on it for sure. I don't like the look in his eye and that beard will go off on us for sure.

    • 50 Caliber profile image

      50 Caliber 

      11 years ago from Arizona

      A nut kicking contest to be sure, damn good natured fellers, I'm watchin for the chance to drop you both like a hooker pants, may have to run out and find a peyote plant, growin fungus to light the dead cells of this old brain then while gettin high and sipping beer there it will be when I least expect it fun hub Wayne it adds to the rucus over to CC's place, 50

    • bayoulady profile image


      11 years ago from Northern Louisiana,USA

      You sure have a way with words! Rate it a PG 13 poem.....grin...

    • profile image


      11 years ago

      Sounds almost like the time I spent in Gilley's Place down there. One of our Truckers got killed. I never went back, but that was 'cause we were barred from it. You nailed me good ol' WB. good thing I wrote that other one first. LOL Here I wondered why I needed that defibrillator, now I know why.BTW, I'd never be caught dead on no Komatsu, let alone that little watch fob of a thing. hehe

    • Wayne Brown profile imageAUTHOR

      Wayne Brown 

      11 years ago from Texas

      @SR1...Yeah ol CC couldn't leave it alone. Wrote that last pome in jibberish that was too hard for this dumb-ass old plowboy to comprehend but I did get the part about the midget and I think there might have been a vague reference to a horse's ass. So I went right to work and hammered this one out! WB

    • saddlerider1 profile image


      11 years ago

      Dirty little Charlie is gonna love this one, being the slider on the dance floor that he is with all his women, he should fit right into McNasty's bar. Of course he will leave Texas with a lesson or two from those cowgirl's ya don't go a messing with their milk and honey without getting stung. Fun hub.

    • Wayne Brown profile imageAUTHOR

      Wayne Brown 

      11 years ago from Texas are absolutely correct on that point. I love to trade poetic barbs with the ralwus! WB

      @A.A.Zavala...I thought Charlie was gonna lay off me but he wrote another pome about me and a midget that I couldn't understand...had to get 'em back LOL! WB

    • A.A. Zavala profile image

      Augustine A Zavala 

      11 years ago from Texas

      That damn dirty charlie. Sounds like a guy I knew in the army. Another outstanding Poem!


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