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Conversation On Feminism

Updated on June 16, 2018
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Danny Sparks is a stand up Comedian, Writer and Actor and Entrepenuer. He lives in Santa Monica, Ca with his wife and three children.

Feminism 101

INT. Dining room table (some sort of meal time)


Three people are sitting at a table, one man, and two women


Camera, on dolly, is slowly rolling around table


DANNY - Husband

Holly - Wife

Asha - Holly’s Mother




DANNY, is taking large bites of his food, not looking up, but talking to HOLLY:

“So, how’s school? You should almost be done by now, yea?”


HOLLY:

“Eh, school’s fine, I mean, I have a semester to go, but I’m not sure, ya know, if my old credits will transfer over or if I’ll have to retake those classes…”


ASHA:

(interjecting) “hell?..not sure?!?! You took them classes, they count, boo boo. I transferred units from the 70s when I was getting my first degree.”


HOLLY:

“Yea, that’s what I’m thinking. You know, I just get nervous about it sometimes, like, I just want it to be done, but I’m sure it’ll all be ok.”


Silverware and plates are clinking and clanking as they eat…


(Mouth full of food..)Danny:

“So, what classes, you takin’”


Holly:

“Umm, Global Studies…”


Danny (not sure what the hell that is..):

“Uh..ok..”


Holly:

“Umm, a creative writing class...I think it’s like ‘English 34’ or something, and..”


Danny:

“I love creative writing…”


ASHA:

“yes!”


Holly:

“--And, uh, oh yea, Women's’ Studies 10.”


ASHA:

(interested)

“Ohhhhhhhh, Women’s Studies, that sounds fun!”


Danny:

“-Yea, for women..”


Holly and ASHA exchange a resentful stare


Danny:

“I mean, like, what, is it like a “history of women” thing? or like a ‘girl power’ thing? (trying to be funny) So, is it like a feminists type deal?”


ASHA:

(sarcastic) “feminists type deal...”


Danny:
(nervous laugh)

“I get it, I get it…”


Holly:

(aggitated) “No, you don’t get it. Women’s studies, global studies, all of this material, including Feminism is a part of my major. It’s not just some girl thing or some simple concept. I almost wish you’d take the class, so you’d know a little more on the subject before just blurting out your opinions…”


ASHA:

“oop”


Danny:

“hey, i never said I was an expert on feminism, or that I think the issues women face aren’t serious or important, but now since I haven’t read the book or taken your class, I can’t have an opinion?”


Holly says nothing, shaking her head


Danny:

“Look, I think feminism is cool.”


Holly:

“Cool?”


Danny:

“Look, you know what I mean, I mean, hell, I’m a feminist…--supporter---, like, I’m all for equal pay, and equal stuff, but, like I also still believe in traditional roles of men and women, you know, not like i’m better, but i’m a man, you’re a woman. When things go bump in the night, we all know who’s gotta get up and go check it out..”


ASHA:

“So, a woman can’t get up and check on a “bump in the night”?”


Danny:

“I mean, sure..but”


ASHA:

“maybe you should take the class..and read the book”


Danny:

“Ok, ok ok, I agree that maybe I need a little education on feminism and women’s studies, but I think a lot of feminists are more like gatekeepers of feminism, not ambassadors of feminism..”


Holly:

“thats ridiculous.”


Danny:

“Let me explain.”


ASHA:

“Oh, please do.”


Danny:

“So, there was this comedy show that I heard about through a friend, and I wasn’t doing anything that night, so I decided to go and try to get a spot on it. It was at a coffee shop on the westside, so I knew it was like ‘hippie’ or ‘progressive’ or whatever you call it when white people have a cause..anyway, so I show up and find out its a (airquotes) “Feminist” show. Hmmm. So, I’m like, OK, i’ve done Black shows, Spanish shows, gay shows, Jewish shows, so a Womens show should be fun.


(continues)


“So, i approach this lady who’s in charge of the show and ask her if I’d be able to get up and do a few minutes on the show. She lets me know its a feminist show and I assure her that my material isn’t offensive to women or children. She says ok, but I have to ask you one question. I say ok..she says ‘are you a feminist?’ I had to think for a second, like was this a trick question, like how can I be a feminist if im a man? So, I tell her, to be honest, I AM NOT a Feminist, but I do support the cause, I mean, it is a comedy show, right? ANd I’m a comic, so what’s the problem.

(getting gradually upset)

Well, she had a huge problem with it! She told me I couldn’t be on the show because Im not a feminist. In that moment, she had the opportunity to enlighten me, as to what a feminist even is, to perhap school me, but in that moment, she shut the door on me, and I walked away having a feeling like Feminism is some club where if you don’t have the membership card, you can’t even be at the table.”


ASHA:

“Interesting.”


© 2018 Danny Sparks

working

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