Drug Me Before You Leave

You know me now.
.... I wake up hoping that the sun rise ain't that flashy, but just enough to warm my eyes.
Am only crazy when am really me.
I see grey where they see black. And black where its white.
..
Please don't turn, it else I won't be able to say what I really want to... I seriously won't say a word if I get lost I your eyes again...
.... It would be simpler if you could read my thoughts while I stare at the sunrise that doesn't please everyone but me...
It would be easier if i could somehow say it without words...
...
But I don't know how to..
..... I know am not easy and stuff..... Personally, I don't know how many times have thought of writing a suicide note, but am glad you've been there to make me think otherwise..
And am not going to complain about anything, because there is nothing to complain about.... Just the support and the love in abudance that I didn't deserve...
.
.. And am just saying, nothing's changed really... Your happiness is still my first priority, and I don't think you get much of that anymore, cause I don't know what to do anymore.
.
I guess am just asking you to get off this ship, cause have seen the wreck ahead.
It's a bit hard on my side though, but ill survive better knowing am not causing you no pain. ..
... I gave up on me a while back, I don't wanna ruin you..
...
I'd say run, but please drug me or something before you leave.... It will be less painful