ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel

Diary of a Hopeful Writer

Updated on July 30, 2017
Stella Kaye profile image

Stella has written many articles on writing and how to become an online writer, she has been writing online since 2007.

The World At Your Fingertips

Source

September 1999

I've always wanted to write since early childhood and now I've turned forty I've decided it's now or never. No more excuses.


A Novel Idea

Sometime during the past week, I decided to write a novel. I reckoned that by now I would at least have managed to finish chapter one but in reality, I have absolutely nothing to show for my efforts.

I've used a vast amount of A4 paper and exhausted the ink in several gel pens, but no chapter one. I have this wonderful idea for my novel; I'm going to call it "Century's End." It'll be about a house that stands on a Cornish cliff and describes the life and times of all the families who've lived there since it was built at the turn of the last century. But I haven't got a clue how to go about it and halfway through the evening I figure out it'll probably be well into the next century before I even get to the end of the first paragraph.

I must remember to call in at Woolworth's tomorrow and replenish my supply of writing materials. After all, A4 paper is on offer at only 99 pence and at that price, I can afford to waste a whole lot more of it and not feel too guilty.

I have a computer; perhaps I should attempt to use it - if I can get the kids to start it up for me. Technological moron, I might be, but at least it will save me a lot of paper. With a computer, you have a whole new world at your fingertips.

It's now 9.30 pm and I'm panicking because I know I won't have anything to read at my writers' circle meeting tomorrow. I joined because I had more time to spare now my youngest son has started school but maybe I should have waited until I had an adequate supply of material to read out.

Even if I stay up all night I'll never manage that elusive chapter one I mentioned earlier. Maybe I just won't go to the writers' circle tomorrow (defeatist attitude rears its ugly head). I'm sure I can think of a reasonable excuse since I'm a mother of four children.

What are the other members going to do to me anyway if I have nothing to contribute? One lady writes brilliant novels just like Catherine Cookson; another already has one book published and there's even an actor. There's someone who does occasional radio work too. How can I ever compete with them? Will they be abusive or say I'm thick or something? They seem quite a nice bunch so I don't think they'll be THAT horrid to me. Maybe I should abandon the idea of becoming a writer altogether and join a reading group instead. Why make life more difficult?

Excuses, excuses; I'll never think up anything original anyway. It's all been done before, hasn't it? Inspiration - that's what I need - but it always eludes me whenever I have a pen in my hand.

Excuses aside, there's nowhere to hide from this vocation I’m inflicting on myself; even an innocent trip to the library in search of inspiration makes me feel guilty - all those books and none of them have been written by me!

Perhaps I'll dig out that poem I wrote about my father, years ago but it'll probably take all night to find. I could read it tomorrow. It's a funny poem - or at least I thought it was when I wrote it. Pam Ayres, you'll soon have a rival.

All these years I've been scribbling away quite effortlessly in my page-a-day diary, like some latter day Samuel Pepys but now I've plucked up the courage to join the local writers' circle I seem to be lost for words. "Scriveners' palsy" is apparently the correct terminology (just posh for writers' block).

Ever since I joined the group a few weeks ago my husband has been jokingly telling his friends that I'm learning to write. "Left it a bit late hasn't she?" they inquire with a snigger. He just loves giving people the impression that I have two brain cells less than a cabbage.

My eldest daughter was helpful at first when I revealed the plot of my novel but then she decided to change the characters and sequence of events so drastically that I lost my temper altogether: "Look, whose darn book is this anyway?"I shouted at her vehemently as I hurled a block of A4 paper in her direction.

I read the synopsis of my novel to my husband the other night and his entire critical appreciation of it was summed up concisely in two words: "It's crap." This resulted in me throwing it all in the waste paper basket which is why I have nothing to read at the writers' circle tomorrow.

Authors note. First novel eventually completed several years later in April 2001 but as yet still unpublished well into the 21st century.

All these books and none of them have been written by me!

— Stella Kaye
Source

Thank Goodness For Computers and the Internet!

Source

© 2015 Stella Kaye

Comments

    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment

    • Stella Kaye profile imageAUTHOR

      Stella Kaye 

      3 years ago from UK

      Thank you for your comment. Yes, thanks to computers and the Internet my writing has progressed somewhat since 1999 when I first began. I now have over 600 articles published but the novel and two further novels are still on the back burner!

    • RonElFran profile image

      Ronald E Franklin 

      3 years ago from Mechanicsburg, PA

      Stella, I'm glad you've been released from the tyranny of A4 paper. You're an interesting writer, and I hope you get that novel finished.

    working

    This website uses cookies

    As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, hubpages.com uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

    For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at: https://hubpages.com/privacy-policy#gdpr

    Show Details
    Necessary
    HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
    LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
    Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
    AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
    Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
    CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the googleapis.com or gstatic.com domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
    Features
    Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
    Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
    Marketing
    Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
    Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
    Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
    Statistics
    Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
    ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)