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The Nazi Party - Dumb Poem # 62

Updated on March 7, 2016

It is OK to use a word that would ordinarily mean one thing to mean something entirely different. I once had a book written by an author ("KMS") who wanted to remain anonymous. He wrote the thing with a mixture of English and German, but used neither of those languages altogether correctly. His stuff was funny but sometimes a little difficult to understand on first reading. There was one passage in his book dealing with the conversation between a "naturalized" old-timer (a German immigrant who had lived in Chicago for many years) and a freshly-arrived immigrant. The latter asked in German if the old-timer would kindly tell him where the streetcar stopped. The old-timer obliged, using a funny mixture of bad English and murdered German. The immigrant then asked the old-timer to tell him "in German." The old-timer muttered under his breath, "Good grief. The guy's been here for only a short ten days and already he has forgotten his mother language!"

Well, I have been here long enough to handle English OK, and my high school gave me three years of learning German before they turned me loose on the world, but I thought it was going to be fun to murder both languages in the following dumb poem. You could do the same.


Another funny illustration by my friend, Al Kaeppel...

The Nazi Party


Iss not so demm schure soytin
who iss dees schtoopid Loytin.
Zey komm und dine,
trink all mine vine,
denn schwing on vindow coytin.

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    • GusTheRedneck profile imageAUTHOR

      Gustave Kilthau 

      6 years ago from USA

      Hi "poo" -

      Can't say that I blame you - that is, "Dumb Poems" are exactly that - dumb. :)

      Gus :-)))

    • profile image

      poo 

      6 years ago

      poooo

    • GusTheRedneck profile imageAUTHOR

      Gustave Kilthau 

      7 years ago from USA

      Good Doctor bj - It is funny how some folks can pronounce things and "Freud's insides" surely has the qualifications. Nice one.

      Gus :-)))

    • drbj profile image

      drbj and sherry 

      7 years ago from south Florida

      Liked your dumb funny poem, Gus. It reminded me how we can get confused when someone with a heavy accent explains something to us.

      My real life example: I had a professor in college (long, long ago) whose native language was Spanish and he still had a pronounced Spanish accent. For years I tried to figure out what he was talking about when he referred to Freud's "insides". What???

      One day it dawned on me. He was saying, "insights". :)

    • GusTheRedneck profile imageAUTHOR

      Gustave Kilthau 

      9 years ago from USA

      Well, Howdy Sue...Let's just the two of us call our mutual efforts "sauerkraut!" As to Spanish, I speak only several words of that nice language. At a continuing Ed class, the instructor was playfully telling us about the time he instructed up in the northeast U.S. He gave examples of how some of his students pronounced various Spanish words. One that I remember well was "tamales." One of his students pronounced it, "Taa Males." There was more. :-)

    • Sue Adams profile image

      Juliette Kando FI Chor 

      9 years ago from Andalusia

      Hey thanks Gus for answering my question about multilingual puns and poetry, an even smaller niche than poetry itself.

      We laughed our heads off the other night when asking English guests to pronounce the Dutch word "huilen", meaning "to cry". They tried and tried but could only come up with a sound like "Hoylen", as in the German "heulen".

      Allow me to add a line to your poem.

      Iss not so demm schure soytin

      who iss dees schtoopid Loytin.

      Zey komm und dine,

      trink all mine vine,

      denn schwing on vindow coytin,

      Zey fall und konnen nur hoylen."

      I find Spanish the most phonetic of the languages I know, less open to miss-pronounciation, less fun I guess.

    • maven101 profile image

      maven101 

      9 years ago from Northern Arizona

      I remember listening to that speech with my Dad, a German speaker, and him remarking " Hey, he just called himself a pastry "....I'm still wondering if Obama has learned a few words in that rare language, Austrian...or Hillary the meaning in Russian for " reset "...Larry

    • GusTheRedneck profile imageAUTHOR

      Gustave Kilthau 

      9 years ago from USA

      Thanks Larry. The German word for people is "Leuten." Most everyone would pronounce that as "Looten." So I wrote, "Loytin" and that worked with "coytin" (curtain) and "soytin" (certain) and maybe caused a grimace to appear on the face of a German speaker. (Kind of like JFK's "Ich bin ein Berliner!" in his speech to the Germans then suffering through the Berlin problems. He thought that he had said, "I am a Berliner." I guess he found out later that he had told everyone that he was a jelly donut (ein Berliner). Language stuff can be funny when you get to messing around idioms and the like.

    • maven101 profile image

      maven101 

      9 years ago from Northern Arizona

      HAW !!...Coytin? A German with a Brooklyn accent...Too funny...well done, my friend...Larry

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