ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel

Flatulence on a Windy Day

Updated on March 19, 2013

Caution: Reading may cause empathetic reaction.


There is no finer time for some of us to say,

that its impossible to stay a smile on a windy day.

For it permits that satisfying moment when the winds begin to course,

to release a little pressure from within, yet no one wiser to the source.

Innocently walking by with not a care to be seen,

and anonymously leaving something wherever one has been.

A little treat for the next passer-by a slight whiff they will have received,

your signature on work well done, a scent not to be believed.

For those of us who are blessed with an active plumbing system,

to cut the cheese among the crowds is not an act of terrorism.

A bit of happiness we find in our own special way,

when our flatulence is disguised by a windy day.


Comments

Submit a Comment

  • acaetnna profile image

    acaetnna 

    6 years ago from Guildford

    Awesome and totally true!!

  • fucsia profile image

    fucsia 

    7 years ago

    The real life is funny, it is true! We should always remember that having fun is important!the next windy day I will think of this Hub! :)

  • burning bush profile imageAUTHOR

    burning bush 

    7 years ago

    Pamela, there is nothing funnier than real life. Thanks for your commentary.

  • Pamela99 profile image

    Pamela Oglesby 

    7 years ago

    That was very clever and absolutely hysterical. It is so true, which makes it so funny.

  • burning bush profile imageAUTHOR

    burning bush 

    7 years ago

    Thanks B Malin. Yes, many of us sleep alone. I will enjoy having you as a follower. I appreciate those who have a sense of humour. :)

  • b. Malin profile image

    b. Malin 

    7 years ago

    Funny, funny piece. I used to manage a chiropractor's office...that was his" trade mark" to any room in the office. On paper it's funny...in person...NOT! I'm going to become a follower...But maybe not invite you for a bean dinner!

  • burning bush profile imageAUTHOR

    burning bush 

    7 years ago

    Gus, you the man! I'll remember your quote the next time its windy. By the way, you would probably appreciate learning that the first ad to appear adjacent to my poem was for Chili's. :)

  • GusTheRedneck profile image

    Gustave Kilthau 

    7 years ago from USA

    Burning Bush - You are good (and funny)! Your amusing poem reminds me of one surgeon's preamble to his medical journal article about the need to take extra care not to produce damage to the anal sphincter muscle when excising hemmorhoids. He pointed out that the sphincter was the only muscle in the human body that knew when a person was alone or in a crowd.

    Gus ;-)

  • burning bush profile imageAUTHOR

    burning bush 

    7 years ago

    Bobbi, I just couldn't help myself. Every now and then I feel the need to speak the truth and find the commonality in all of us. I am so glad you enjoyed.

  • BobbiRant profile image

    BobbiRant 

    7 years ago from New York

    So funny and it brought a big smile to my face. Not a rant, which I've come to appreciate you for, but so funny and very, very good.

  • burning bush profile imageAUTHOR

    burning bush 

    7 years ago

    We can't take ourselves too seriously. Life must be sprinkled with a little humour. Thank you for visiting and commenting littlesecret13.

  • littlesecret13 profile image

    littlesecret13 

    7 years ago from inside your mind

    this is awesome! i found myself giggling, yet everything you said is so true!

working

This website uses cookies

As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, hubpages.com uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at: https://hubpages.com/privacy-policy#gdpr

Show Details
Necessary
HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the googleapis.com or gstatic.com domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
Features
Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
Marketing
Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
Statistics
Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)