Good Pastoral or Religious Jokes for Pastors :-)
Packing for a trip...
A young Christian packing his bag for a journey said to a friend, "I have nearly finished packing. All I have to put in are a guidebook, a lamp, a mirror, a microscope, a telescope, a volume of fine poetry, a few biographies, a package of old letters, a book of songs, a sword, a hammer, and a set of tools." "But you cannot put all that into your bag," objected the friend. "Oh, yes," said the Christian. "Here it is." And he placed his Bible in the corner of the suitcase and closed the lid. -Anonymous
At the Dinner Table
A Catholic Missionary was in the country making his rounds from farm to farm...
At the dinner table the poor farm wife had made a Delicious dinner with things grown right on their own farm... But what caught the attention of the Padre most of all was the scrumptious Baked Chicken that was so moist and tender...
After the Dinner was over... and the Padre was about to leave he wanted to thank the poor family for their hospitality and by way of showing his approval of the wonderful dinner, he asked the poor woman... "My Child... What was the Chickens Name?..." to which the lady replied... "We just called it Cha ka." The Padre then bowed his head for a moment of contemplation and then prayed... "Lord... Cha ka was good Chicken... a Really GOOD Chicken... and you know... Lord... could you see fit to.. you know.. Don't make its time in Purgatory so long..."
Humor in Death
An old pastor lay dying.
He sent a message to an Internal Revenue Service agent AND his Tax Accountant to come to the hospital. When they arrived, they were ushered up to his room. As they entered the room, the pastor held out his hands and motioned for them to sit on each side of the bed. The pastor grasped their hands, sighed contentedly, smiled and stared at the ceiling.
For a time, no one said anything. Both the IRS agent and lawyer were touched and flattered that the old man would ask them to be with him during his final moments. They were also puzzled because the pastor had never given any indication that he particularly liked either one of them.
Finally, the Lawyer asked... "Pastor, why did you ask the two of us to come here??"
The old pastor mustered all his strength, and then said weakly...
"Jesus died between two thieves, and that's how I'd like to go too".
Who Tore Down The Wall?
One Sunday the Pastor decided to check up on how good a job the SS teachers were doing getting the lessons across so using a substitute in his own class he dropped in on the Primary Boys Class.
The teacher introduced him to the boys whereon the Pastor asked a little lad on the front row if he knew who tore down the wall of Jericho. The boy was scared out of his wits and thinking he was being accused cried out, "It wasn't me sir, I didn't do it!"
The dumbfounded Pastor looked at the Teacher as though to say, "I can't believe what I just heard!" The teacher feeling sorry for the boy says, "Pastor I want you to know that I can vouch for this kid, if he said he didn't do it then he didn't do it!"
The Pastor at a loss for words went off muttering to himself, "I've got to call a Deacon's meeting and deal with this sad state of affairs." At the deacon's meeting he went over the whole story from start to finish, "I went to the primary boys class....". As he finished his story he waited for the reaction from the deacons. For several minutes the deacons just looked at one another, finally one of the senior deacons spoke up.
"Pastor we'll probably never know who tore down that wall but the less said about it the better, We can take up an offering and rebuild it and let it go at that."