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HO, HO, HO...MAYAN'S by b. Malin

Updated on December 14, 2012
A Mayan Cartoon
A Mayan Cartoon

IT WON'T HAPPEN...

I'm FINALLY back Hubbing again. Where have I been? Well, let's go back to a few weeks after "Hurricane Sandy". So lean forward, grab something to eat, but don't get your Computer dirty, as you get ready for another tale to begin.

Lover Man is walking around the house deep in thought. I say, "What are you thinking about"? He says "the Mayans". I say, sounding puzzled, "The Mayans"? and then I add, "Why"? "Because, he says, sighing a very DEEP sigh, December 21st is right around the corner...the End of the World, according to the Mayan Calendar, and we don't have Flood Insurance". I can't help myself, I start to Laugh. Then I say, "we haven't had Flood Insurance since we bought this house, and we survived Hurricanes, Irene & Sandy with our house intact, except for the 3 feet of water in the "Crawl Space" and needing new Duct work. Which we have taken care of. Of course I agree we should have Flood Insurance, but not because I believe in the Mayan Calendar. I clear my throat, as I say, just hear me out".

My Theory... The younger generation of Mayans were BORED out of their minds! There was NO TV, no Real Entertainment, like Broadway Shows, or the Movies, or Concerts. No Iphones...No Text Messaging...No Electricity...NOTHING! So they began making up a "Calendar" on how long it would take until "Things" would get invented. Much too soon, they ran out of Space. What to do? What to do? The Elder Group of Mayans were Mad... The kids had used up ALL the "Wall Space"! A Mayan Meeting was held, and it was decided they'd pack up and leave in search of "New Wall Space"...And they were Never seen again, because each decided to go their separate ways..."Group Living" for the young, and the not so young, had lost its appeal.

Now Lover Man is Smiling. "So we should still get Flood Insurance". "Of course I say smiling back. and then I add, You do realize that if its true, the World coming to an end and all...what good would the Flood Insurance do?...Think about that one for a moment".

We do get the Flood Insurance, and a week later we take off for Florida, in our Rented, 2013 "Ford Escape", compliments of Geico Insurance and Enterprise Rental Company. The car is a Pleasure to drive, and we decide this is the car we will buy when get to Florida... A day before we are to purchase it, a RECALL comes out..."If the Engine light goes on, GET OUT OF THE CAR...it could EXPLODE"! Ok, ok, we are warned... and are NO longer buying the Ford 2013 Escape.

We finally, with less than 2 weeks to go with our Rental Car, find the Car we want to buy. A 2013 "Kia Sportage". I Love it, Lover Man Loves it, the Salesmen Loves it... He is New Salesman, and it's the first Car he has sold. So he is beyond Happy! It's right off the lot, with nice Amenities...lots of Bells and Whistles...And the Color is "Metallic Silver" in the grayish silver family. And best of All, so far, No Recalls!

Ok, so now you are up to date with me...And speaking of Dates, December 21, 2012 is right around the corner. Do I really think the World will end...Not a Chance. I'm standing by my Theory. Does Love Man still think the World will end...Well he still thinks something might happen...However, he's still saving up to buy a Boat...so what does that tell you!

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    • b. Malin profile image
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      b. Malin 3 years ago

      And yet 2012 came and went...and we are ALL still here! Thanks for Enjoying one of my older Hubs John.

    • John MacNab profile image

      John MacNab 3 years ago from the banks of the St. Lawrence

      Nice one b. On New Year's Eve 1999, I was invited to a special party. When I arrived and asked what was special about it, I was told it was to have a last drink before the end of the world - and they were serious. I shook my head and poured a large malt.

    • b. Malin profile image
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      b. Malin 4 years ago

      Why Thank You Beingwell, I'm happy to receive the Vote! Glad to see you, I'll be by to visit too.

    • beingwell profile image

      beingwell 4 years ago from Bangkok

      Happy to vote this one up! Happy to be hubbing again, too!

    • b. Malin profile image
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      b. Malin 4 years ago

      Hi Sunnie, Thanks. True. Those Crazy Mayans...But I heard, THEY did start a new Calendar, Kinda called it, "Mayan Playboy". Ho, Ho!

      So Glad you're Smiling!

    • b. Malin profile image
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      b. Malin 4 years ago

      Hi Sueswan, Thank You. Mmm, Investing in an Ark, sounds Scary...But then again, so is Flood Insurance!

      Thanks so much for your Funny Comments, and of course your Votes!

    • profile image

      Sunnie Day 4 years ago

      Hi b, so funny...I think the boat would have been the best bet..but since we are all still here maybe a new calender is in order..hehe

      Thank you for the smiles!

      Sunnie

    • profile image

      Sueswan 4 years ago

      Very funny. I think maybe investing in an ark may be better than the flood insurance. ;-)

      Voted up and funny

    • b. Malin profile image
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      b. Malin 4 years ago

      Hi James, I know, I know...I'm so Glad you Enjoyed...And we'll all be around to have the last Laugh!

    • James A Watkins profile image

      James A Watkins 4 years ago from Chicago

      As always, I enjoy your wit. Thanks for the good read. And, whaddya know- we are still here! :-)

      James

    • b. Malin profile image
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      b. Malin 4 years ago

      Hi Bobbi, you are so Right. So glad you Enjoyed. And until the next End of the World Saga's... we will be paying our Taxes!

    • BobbiRant profile image

      BobbiRant 4 years ago from New York

      Great piece! I think if we all survived the 'end of the world' in October, 2011, we are doing well. Love this!

    • b. Malin profile image
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      b. Malin 4 years ago

      Thanks Shiningirl, I try...So Glad you Enjoyed!

    • shiningirisheyes profile image

      Shining Irish Eyes 4 years ago from Upstate, New York

      Love your humor and enjoyed this read!

    • b. Malin profile image
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      b. Malin 4 years ago

      Hi Frank,

      Thank You. I too hope that 2013 will be a Good Year for You. Giving you Good Health, and a "little" Wealth and Lots of Happiness mixed in there too!

    • Frank Atanacio profile image

      Frank Atanacio 4 years ago from Shelton

      B Malin enjoy the New Year may it bring joy and happiness.. and everything you wish for bless you :)

    • b. Malin profile image
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      b. Malin 4 years ago

      Hi Frogyfish,

      Thank You so much, I'm so glad you Enjoyed!

      A Very Happy & Healthy 2013 New Year to you too!

    • frogyfish profile image

      frogyfish 4 years ago from Central United States of America

      Now, your 'take' was just 'right on'! And your tale was truly great! Cheers for 2012...we need it! Happy New Year!

    • b. Malin profile image
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      b. Malin 4 years ago

      Hi Girishpuri, I'm so Glad you Enjoyed my Humor, all in Good Fun.

      A Very Happy, & Healthy New Year to You too!

    • girishpuri profile image

      Girish puri 4 years ago from NCR , INDIA

      A great fun hub, thanks and a very happy new year.

    • b. Malin profile image
      Author

      b. Malin 4 years ago

      Hi Genna, Thanks for stopping by. Believe me, I've missed All of you. I'm so Glad you Enjoyed my Hub.

      I guess we can now say "Bye, Bye, to the Mayans"...and I do wish them well, wherever they are.

      Love the Kia! And thanks for wishing me well with it.

      Thanks for all your Comments and Thoughts, always appreciated.

      Hope your Christmas was a Happy, Warm, and Fuzzy One!

    • Genna East profile image

      Genna East 4 years ago from Massachusetts, USA

      I can’t believe I almost missed this one. Good to see you, Barb; you have been missed. As usual, I always finish reading your hubs with a big smile. I think the Mayans might have been talking about some kind of slow demarcation or change in life as we know it; but I much prefer and love your “running out of room” idea. Enjoy your new Kia. And best wishes for a Merry Christmas, and a happy holiday season to you and Lover Man. :-)

    • b. Malin profile image
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      b. Malin 4 years ago

      Hi Rosemay, Yes here we are...and here we will be! Thanks, it's GOOD to be back.

      Ah, the Boat...A dream...maybe after we sell our NJ home...Not a Big Boat...just a little Boat...Lover Man dreams BIG.

      Yes, I love my new Kia, and a few payments down the road and she's all MINE!

      You Enjoyed your Christmas too, Girlfriend!

    • Rosemay50 profile image

      Rosemary Sadler 4 years ago from Hawkes Bay - NewZealand

      Nice to see you back, love your take on the running out of wall space. Well it didn't happen so I guess we are all stuck with paying our taxes. Just how big a boat is Lover man planning on buying? I've seen ads for the new Kia, looks awesome.

      Have a wonderful water free, storm free, and hurricane free Christmeas. All the very best for 2013

    • b. Malin profile image
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      b. Malin 4 years ago

      Hi Gypsy, Thank You. Yes, someday, Everything will come to an End, but NOT in our Life time...The Government couldn't AFFORD it...who would be here to pay TAXES? Ha, Ha.

      LOL back to you!

    • b. Malin profile image
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      b. Malin 4 years ago

      Hi Jackie, So hear I am 24 hours later and Hubbing to You. Actually, it's suppose to end a little after Noon today 12:21 to be Exact...It's NOT going to happen. Trust me.

      Thanks for your most Interesting and Informative Comments.

    • b. Malin profile image
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      b. Malin 4 years ago

      Hi Susan, I'm so Enjoying my Kia, drives like a Dream. My Lover Man is Always thinking...Men...Right...after the End...What then? However, he's right to get the Insurance...Because We will be hear Tomorrow, and the day after, and the day after that, Etc., Etc!

      A Very Happy Healthy New Year to You and your Lovely Family.

    • b. Malin profile image
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      b. Malin 4 years ago

      Hi Dreamseeker, Thank You. The End of the World is NOT coming, so we shall get to carry on! I'm so Glad you Enjoyed my Spin on it! A Big Thank You for your Vote as well!

    • b. Malin profile image
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      b. Malin 4 years ago

      Hi Nell, That is too Funny...You're NOT Kidding Me...Right? Anyway, I'm Laughing at your Comments as I'm Enjoying Driving my New Kia! Would you believe FORD, just called me to see what I wound up Buying...Ho, Ho, Ho!

      Friday Tomorrow...and we'll all be here, Hubbing away once again on Saturday! LOL.

    • Gypsy Rose Lee profile image

      Gypsy Rose Lee 4 years ago from Riga, Latvia

      Voted up and funny. Yes, we will still be here in 2013. This is just a way to let procrastinators keep doing what they do best because after all things will soon end anyway. lol

    • Jackie Lynnley profile image

      Jackie Lynnley 4 years ago from The Beautiful South

      They thought it might be the rapture of the church, something about a statue with the Christ child and the alignment of the planets on that day, the 21st, is suppose to make the sun hit on the child. Beats doomsday although I missed part of it and then couldn't find it again to see what I had missed. Oh well, in about 24 hours we will know. I read in China 500 people were jailed over this stuff. Shocking.

    • Just Ask Susan profile image

      Susan Zutautas 4 years ago from Ontario, Canada

      I like your choice in the Kia Sportage. I'm with you, the world is not going to end and like you said if it does what good is flood insurance if we're all gone ....

      Happy New Year!

    • profile image

      dreamseeker2 4 years ago

      Cute story! : ) Had me smiling all the way through it. But, you always were good at making us see the whole picture, from beginning to end. (and I don't mean the end of the world, either!) ; ) Voted up!

    • Nell Rose profile image

      Nell Rose 4 years ago from England

      Hi, I did laugh when you mentioned the Ford recall! guess who works or should I say worked for Ford Recall? Um yes er me! haha! I am the little English voice you hear when you phone them up and say, whats wrong with my car and why do I have to bring it in for a darn recall? lol! so its not the Mayans fault that the apocalypse is happening, just blame it on little me and the Ford Recall department! lol!

    • b. Malin profile image
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      b. Malin 4 years ago

      Hi Fiddleman, Can't believe you stopped by, but so Happy you did...It's been a while.

      Thank goodness for Insurance, I do Love my new KIA...It's so Smooth!

      I'm now heading over to your Hubs.

    • b. Malin profile image
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      b. Malin 4 years ago

      Hi Mike, Thank You. Thank you...THANK YOU. I must now go over and visit your Hubs. But before I do, I wish to say Thank You for your Votes as well.

    • b. Malin profile image
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      b. Malin 4 years ago

      Hi Teacher, I know. Maybe we should all just LIVE it UP...Don't spend too much Money though...Because Dec. 22 will Dawn a New Day, and we will ALL still be here!

      Thanks for Enjoying and Commenting.

    • b. Malin profile image
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      b. Malin 4 years ago

      Hi Alicia, Thank You.

      I hope your Class Enjoys my Story. I'd be curious to hear their reaction. But remember to tell them, IT'S NOT GOING TO HAPPEN, I promise!

    • Fiddleman profile image

      Robert Elias Ballard 4 years ago from Zirconia, North Carolina

      Been missing you. Isn't insurance great! I believe I would have gone for the gusto and gotten myself a Tahoe!! Great to see you again.

    • Mike Robbers profile image

      Mike Robbers 4 years ago from London

      lol ,, loved your theory of how Mayans began making up a Calendar :P

      Loved the cartoon, too.. Voted you up - funny and awesome - and shared all the ways!

    • teaches12345 profile image

      Dianna Mendez 4 years ago

      If we were really coming to an end on the 21st, many of us would be changing our lifestyle right now. Funny, what need is there to continue paying any of our expenses if the world is ending soon? Enjoyed your wit and reflections, Barbara.

    • AliciaC profile image

      Linda Crampton 4 years ago from British Columbia, Canada

      I'm very happy to read another hub from you, Barbara! The End of the World is a big topic with my students. I'll have to tell them your story about the Mayan calendar!

    • b. Malin profile image
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      b. Malin 4 years ago

      Hi Sunshine, Thank you. We will Survive, and We will be saying "Happy New Year 2013"! Yeah, that's right, I want to enjoy my NEW CAR!

    • b. Malin profile image
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      b. Malin 4 years ago

      Hi ImKarn, Thank You and in x amount of payments...It's Mine, the Kia is mine! If you lived closer I'd take you for a Ride! The Color is Beautiful.

      And so we will all be here Singing "Happy New year 2013"!

      Love you back girlfriend!

    • b. Malin profile image
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      b. Malin 4 years ago

      Hi Tillsontitan, I'm Back, I'm Sooo Back!

      That's my Guy... My Lover Man, Worrying about the Mayans...But hey, it gave me something to write about! The car is definitely a KEEPER. Thanks for Enjoying my Friend!

    • b. Malin profile image
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      b. Malin 4 years ago

      Kj, That sounds Amazing! Thanks for sharing.

    • b. Malin profile image
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      b. Malin 4 years ago

      Hi Jackie, Hey, we've got to find Humor in the Mayans...otherwise we are Doomed. Laughter is the Best Medicine. I'm so Glad you stopped by to Comment. Wondering what your News is?

    • b. Malin profile image
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      b. Malin 4 years ago

      Hi MizBej, It was only the 2013 Ford Escape that had 4 Recalls. We even "Googled it" and read about it. I Enjoyed driving it down from Jersey... But once we heard about the recalls, we sadly gave up the idea of buying it.

      I'm so Glad you Enjoyed my Humorous take on the Mayans. They were so Bored...Another Calendar? Yea! They must have found some more Wall Space after all! Thanks for Enjoying and Commenting and of course your Votes.

    • b. Malin profile image
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      b. Malin 4 years ago

      Hi Ruby,

      The Boat is a DREAM of Lover Man's...so you know he's counting on getting past Dec 21st. Yeah, otherwise... We will have to capture one of the Yacht's anchored in the Marina...Yes, a BIG one for the Animals. Hee, Hee!

    • b. Malin profile image
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      b. Malin 4 years ago

      Hi Amy, Wow, you really know how to make ME Smile too! Listen if the World does come to an End...It Won't, but if it does... I'd hope somewhere, somehow, ALL of us Hubbers could be together to Laugh, Dance, Sing...Write...Express ourselves... We are definitely like a "Family" of Writers here on Hub Pages!

    • b. Malin profile image
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      b. Malin 4 years ago

      Hi Deborah, Thank You. It's Good to be Back. We are like a "Family" of Writers here on Hub Pages.

      A Very Merry Christmas to You & your Family Debbie. LOL.

    • b. Malin profile image
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      b. Malin 4 years ago

      Hi Fossillady, Thank You. Love the Car. Getting all the Extras from a Car sitting on the Lot was a Big Plus. The Salesman was priceless. The Boat is a Dream...in the Future...the distant Future! LOL back!

    • Sunshine625 profile image

      Linda Bilyeu 4 years ago from Orlando, FL

      Congrats on your new Kia! Hopefully we will survive 12/21 so you could enjoy your new wheels a lot longer! :)

    • b. Malin profile image
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      b. Malin 4 years ago

      Hi Suzzycue, Thank You.

      Actually a friend called me on the day we were going to buy the Ford Escape and told me the "Good Morning America" (one of those shows) was talking about Another recall on the car. We Googled it, and learned that the Engine could blow up, and to leave the car if the light went on. That was the 4th recall on the Escape. So much as I enjoyed driving it...I wasn't going to buy it after reading about it.

    • b. Malin profile image
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      b. Malin 4 years ago

      Hi Jools, I am SO Back, Thank you! Loved your Thoughts too.

      Those Mayan's just had a Crazy kind of Humor...Not much to do...so they let their Imaginations run Wild...Probably still Laughing somewhere at us!

    • b. Malin profile image
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      b. Malin 4 years ago

      Hi Breakfastpops, I Hate BUGS! Let's just hope it's all a lot of B__ S__ha, ha!

    • b. Malin profile image
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      b. Malin 4 years ago

      Hi Eddy, We are like a "Family" of Writers here on Hub Pages...And you guys are the Best!

      I'm so Glad you Enjoyed dear Friend.

    • b. Malin profile image
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      b. Malin 4 years ago

      Thank you Tobusiness, It's so Good to own a Car again!

      Right...if the World come to an End...Let's just be Dancing in the Street! But that will NEVER happen. We are both optimistic...after all what's the alternative...Thanks for Enjoying!

    • b. Malin profile image
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      b. Malin 4 years ago

      Hi Mckbird, My Kia Sportage wheels are l8 inches! The Condo w/the View is on the 4th Floor of a 5th story Bldg. The Flood Insurance is for Jersey...It's a Ranch style house. But if the Mayan's are right...oops...But They're NOT!

    • b. Malin profile image
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      b. Malin 4 years ago

      Hi Mhatter, Your welcome. I know, I can't believe there aren't more stories on the Mayan Predictions. But I guess with all the Horrible things that have been happening lately, it's taken a back seat.

    • b. Malin profile image
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      b. Malin 4 years ago

      Hi Xstatic, Thank You. Humor is needed now more than ever this Season. It give me Pleasure if I can give some.

    • b. Malin profile image
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      b. Malin 4 years ago

      Hi Mar, Missed you too, Sweet Lady. Glad I could make you Smile...We will never forgot the Sadness in Connecticut, and the Lives Lost needlessly.

      Season's Greeting to You and your Lovely Family too. Thanks for the Vote.

    • b. Malin profile image
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      b. Malin 4 years ago

      Hi Drbj, Me too! Those Mayan's needed to get a Life, and I believe they Did! It's Good to be back with a Car of my own once again!

    • b. Malin profile image
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      b. Malin 4 years ago

      Hi Btbell, Me too...The alternative is SCARY! I'm so Glad you Enjoyed. Thank You, the Kia is a Fun car to drive.

    • b. Malin profile image
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      b. Malin 4 years ago

      Hi Bill, Thank you, it's Good to be back. A Smile from you, makes my Day!

    • b. Malin profile image
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      b. Malin 4 years ago

      Hi Wetnose, We really do Humor one another, my Lover Man & I. So glad you Enjoyed.

    • b. Malin profile image
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      b. Malin 4 years ago

      Hi Michael, OH...well...EVERYONE misunderstood my Ending... What I was saying is, Lover Man can't be taking it too seriously if he's saving up to buy a Boat...Of course if the Floods come before that...NO WAY! Thanks for the Advice and Love Ya, back.

    • b. Malin profile image
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      b. Malin 4 years ago

      Hi Frank, Never is Lover Man SILENT. Thanks, it's Good to be Back in Hubland!

    • b. Malin profile image
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      b. Malin 4 years ago

      Hi Gail, Thank you. Geico was Wonderful and Fair...Monies bought half the car. Flood Insurance in place, we are now in Florida Land, and loving it.

      Warm Holiday wishes back to you dear Friend...It's so Good to be back Hubbing again. Of course we are still fixing things here in Florida...But I'm going to try for a Hub a week. LOL.

    • b. Malin profile image
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      b. Malin 4 years ago

      I eHealer, I DID get the Kia, and I LOVE it. Well, we got the Flood Insurance, but I still do live Life on edge half/the time! Thanks for the warm Welcome back, good to be back!

    • b. Malin profile image
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      b. Malin 4 years ago

      Hi Atikos, No, I meant, he was Not taking it Seriously, if he was Saving up to buy a Boat!

    • ImKarn23 profile image

      Karen Silverman 4 years ago

      Congrats on the Kia, hon! So exciting - and in one of my favorite colors too! mmmmm....

      as far as the world coming to an end - d'uh...did it come to the end predicted in 2000? No? The Mayan calander ends but then - it starts back up again..

      cause...dat's life..

      love yaxx

    • tillsontitan profile image

      Mary Craig 4 years ago from New York

      What does that tell me? Well, a few things....first I'm so glad to see you are back and all is well. Next, maybe Lover Boy needs a hobby ;) if he has time to worry about the Mayans....lastly,good luck with your new car and thanks for this delightful hub.

      Voted up, funny, and interesting.

    • Attikos profile image

      Attikos 4 years ago from East Cackalacky

      @KJ PAGE: I can't think of anything more horrible than spending seven months cooped in the hold of a leaky old wooden boat with thousands of wild animals and a handful of cranky relatives.

    • K J Page profile image

      K J Page 4 years ago from Pacific Northwest

      Direct lover man to the Dane who has rebuilt the ark complete with petting zoo!!!!

    • Jackie Lynnley profile image

      Jackie Lynnley 4 years ago from The Beautiful South

      Started to say it is funny, but I am not sure it is...I have a link about this but it is suppose to be good news but still too late tonight for me to want to get into it, so I am waiting until tomorrow. We humans...crazy, huh? Crazy things happening though, so I guess we have to wonder.

    • MizBejabbers profile image

      MizBejabbers 4 years ago

      I'm glad you came out of Sandy OK. Strange about the Ford Escape. I have a friend who drives a 2006 Escape Hybrid and hasn't had any trouble with it.

      I love your humor about the Mayans. I've been gone this week for the 12-12-12 Conference. I just got back from a live lecture by John Major Jenkins on the Mayans and 2012. He shares your opinion about the world not coming to an end. Luckily, I don't recall any mention of a flood, though. Another Mayan calendar has been found that continues after Dec. 21, 2012, but that wouldn't make any money for the media so they avoid publicizing it. Loved the cartoon, too. Voted you up and funny!

    • always exploring profile image

      Ruby Jean Fuller 4 years ago from Southern Illinois

      Hello b., Good to see you . If you buy a boat, it might be good to buy a big one just in case. You know, like Noah built.. Hee.

    • Amy Becherer profile image

      Amy Becherer 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO

      Love your levity, B! Since yesterday, it's difficult to find any. Whether the world ends 12/21 as the Mayan's predict or not, I want to be somewhere in your vicinity. I think you could find something to foster a smile even in that event. I'm thinking Lover Man knows how lucky he is! Thank you for the smile today, B.

    • Deborah Brooks profile image

      Deborah Brooks Langford 4 years ago from Brownsville,TX

      You are so delightful.. you speaking my mind.. LOl.. of course it is not going to end. the 21st.. . so glad you got the KIA.. .. sounds wonderful... we just bought 2013 Ford Focus.. hope there is not recalls on that..

      glad to see you writing

      Merry Christmas

      Debbie

    • Fossillady profile image

      Kathi 4 years ago from Saugatuck Michigan

      Cute story, I like the running out of wall space theory. Glad you're back in a new car with all the bells and whistles, and you made the salesman's day. Happy Boat Hunting! lol

    • suzzycue profile image

      Susan Britton 4 years ago from Ontario, Canada

      Love your stories. Did the recall really say get out the car would blow up or is that your wonderful imagination working overtime. I loved this. Enjoy your writing.

    • Jools99 profile image

      Jools99 4 years ago from North-East UK

      Barbara, you're back! Glad to read your latest. I'm with you on 21st and I think your cartoon says it all; they just happened to run out of space and 21st was the the last date entered! I think one of them wrote it down and said "Well look at that! Same backwards as forwards", they all chuckled and went for another pot of cocoa laced with 'coke' leaves and forgot the whole thing..... :o)

    • breakfastpop profile image

      breakfastpop 4 years ago

      We already had the flood, I think it's the invasion of the locusts!

    • Eiddwen profile image

      Eiddwen 4 years ago from Wales

      I can remember when i returned to all my hubfamily after being away for a short while. I can honestly say that i have never ever had such a warm welcome back. This is one for the most wonderful and caring havens on the web.

      Thanks for sharing this gem and enjoy your weekend.

      Eddy.

    • tobusiness profile image

      Jo Alexis-Hagues 4 years ago from Bedfordshire, U.K

      Lovely to have you back, good to hear that you and Lover Man are back on wheels. If the world is coming to an end I don't think the insurance or the boat is going to help much, but your Lover Man is an optimist, and the world needs optimism right now. Great write.

    • mckbirdbks profile image

      mckbirdbks 4 years ago from Emerald Wells, Just off the crossroads,Texas

      Big Wheels Keep On Turning, is how I heard it. Hope the Kia Sportage has bigger wheels than that round Mayan calendar. What story is the condo with the view? The answer to flood insurance rest in the balance.

    • Mhatter99 profile image

      Martin Kloess 4 years ago from San Francisco

      Thank you for this. I'm actually surprised. I thought this Mayan thing would be bigger (commercially) than it is.

    • xstatic profile image

      Jim Higgins 4 years ago from Eugene, Oregon

      Welcome back! We need some humor this holiday season and you have great stories!

    • marcoujor profile image

      Maria Jordan 4 years ago from Jeffersonville PA

      Missed you and good to see you back, b...we need to smile today and this helped so much.

      Season's greetings to you and Lover Man. Voted UP and FAB!

    • drbj profile image

      drbj and sherry 4 years ago from south Florida

      I prefer your 'running out of space' theory, b, to the Mayan End of the World theory. Welcome back in your new car.

    • btrbell profile image

      Randi Benlulu 4 years ago from Mesa, AZ

      I think I like your theory the best! Thank you for a fun hub! Enjoy your new car!

    • billybuc profile image

      Bill Holland 4 years ago from Olympia, WA

      Well welcome back Barbara! It's always nice to hear about your escapades; no matter what the subject, they always bring a smile to my face.

    • wetnosedogs profile image

      wetnosedogs 4 years ago from Alabama

      Love the camaraderie you and your lover man have. Great laughs. Be safe.

    • profile image

      cleaner3 4 years ago

      b, you are so funny.. but to be serious..now.

      the mayans actually predict that the world will be cleansed by the flood water.. sooo what does that tell you.. LoverMan has been doing his research.. I got to give it to him .. if it does flood the earth you two will survive that, and if it doesn't .. you two can sail around the world seeing all the sights. A word of caution.. watch out for storms.... Love ya..

      Michael

    • Frank Atanacio profile image

      Frank Atanacio 4 years ago from Shelton

      and the voices of lover man would not be silenced good to see you again :)

    • Happyboomernurse profile image

      Gail Sobotkin 4 years ago from South Carolina

      Wonderful seeing a hub by you! Glad Geico came through with replacement money for a new vehicle, and am also glad you and Lover Man have purchased flood insurance and are back in Florida.

      No, I don't believe the world will end on 12/21, but I did enjoy this witty hub about that possibility and the conversation between you and Lover Man.

      Also loved the Mayan cartoon!

      Voted up across the board.

      Sending Hub Hugs & Holiday Wishes Your Way,

      Gail

    • eHealer profile image

      Deborah 4 years ago from Las Vegas

      Hey B, get the KIA, forget the flood insurance, and live life on the edge! Lol, welcome back, it's nice to see you hubbin again! :)

    • Attikos profile image

      Attikos 4 years ago from East Cackalacky

      That he thinks it's coming in the form of a great flood?