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How to Walk Down the Street
Walk on Down that Street!
You've been walking a long time now. At least, if you can read this you've been walking a long time now. If you are a baby reading this and you haven't learned to walk yet, who cares? Dude, you are a baby and you can read! You totally rule. I guess I lost track.
At any rate, walking is a very healthy activity. The more you walk, the more calories you burn each day. It is a great way to get where you need to go and get some sunshine. Think of all the interesting sites that are just waiting for you. So now, let's talk about a basic that we may not think about in life: how to walk down the street.
Signs: They Exist for a Reason
Even if you are not driving a car, this does not mean you should disregard street signs, stoplights, and other necessary warnings. You should always look both ways before crossing the street. I know, it is a little basic, but we need to remember it even as adults.
Sidewalks and crosswalks were created for walkers. Don't ignore them. Sidewalks are your friends. Don't walk out in the middle of the road or walk on the grass if there are sidewalks for you. Someone worked really hard pouring that concrete just for you and your walking experience. Don't let his or her hard work go to waste.
While walking along the sidewalk, you may come across some uneven pavement. Make sure to pay attention so you do not fall. If you should happen to slip, jump back up if at all possible. Look around quickly and make sure no one saw you. If they did see you, either wave and smile to let them know you are fine or just pretend like you meant to do it. If you can't get back up right away, pretend you are looking for a coin or something on the sidewalk. It is important to look cool on your journey. It also helps to carry a cell phone just in case you do seriously injure yourself.
While walking down the street, you will probably encounter other pedestrians. Most of them are going to be totally normal. Others will not be normal at all. It is important to stay alert. Sometimes a person may look a little sketchy or walk too close. This is a good time to make sure your can of pepper spray is visible.
If you do not have pepper spray, you need to order some online or buy some at the store. Pepper spray is not going to protect you 100% of the time, but it helps. Look at it this way - if a thief sees you with your pepper spray verses some other random person not carrying pepper spray, who do you think he is more likely to go after? Pepper spray is not the most threatening weapon, but it is awfully painful and most thieves would rather not experience it.
Aside from dangerous walkers, there are some people that are just plain creepy. You should probably avoid them as well. Here is a list of some of the people you may encounter and should avoid on your walk:
- Pedestrians having lively conversations with no one.
- People yelling at random walkers, pets, etc.
- Anyone spending too much time feeding and talking to squirrels or pigeons.
- Walkers screaming songs at the top of their lungs. (People, no one cares that you are listening to Katy Perry on your IPod. It's creepy. Stop singing out loud.)
- Anyone running as fast as possible. Turn around and see what they are running from. You might need to run, too. If you see nothing, the invisible people are chasing them. Just keep going and avoid any eye contact.
- People just staring without blinking. You never know when Invasion of the Body Snatchers could become a reality.
- Joggers. They aren't really creepy; they just need walkers to get out their way.
- Clowns or Mimes. Need I say more? I didn't think so.
Make the Walking Experience Safe!
Besides carrying pepper spray, there are some other basic items you should have handy. If the forecast calls for rain, then you should carry an umbrella. If it is an especially cold day, it is a good idea to wear a coat, gloves, and boots. Nothing ends a walk quicker than not being prepared for the weather.
You should also always remain alert. Even if you are walking along the sidewalk, there are some really bad drivers out there. Some people start their day by chugging alcohol for breakfast. Yes, these people drive while they are in this condition. You never want to get too comfortable while walking on a sidewalk. It is best to always pay attention to your surroundings and listen for screeching brakes, yelling, or honking horns. You never know when you may have to jump out the way of a moving car. Sometimes drivers forget about pedestrians. It is important for a pedestrian to never forget about the drivers.
Now Get Out There and Walk!
Are you really still reading this? Think of all the calories you are not burning. It is time to get away from the computer and go for a walk. I promise you, with all this helpful information you are going to be walking down the street like a pro!
So now, go on. Shoo! What are you waiting for?
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