How to get the groom to the church on time (a true but funny story)
The morning of the wedding
It was the morning of the big day and to say the groom was nervous would be an understatement. I was one of three in the grooms party, a grooms man if you would, best friend to the groom and a friend to the family.
We spent the morning eating our ulster fry in the grooms home house, there was me, the groom, the grooms father, the best man and another grooms man, five of us in total all scoffing away at our greasy fry, all dying a bit from the drinking session the night before. No one really talking to much due to both nerves but mainly not feeling too good.
The wedding mass was due to start at a small chapel about one mile away at 12 O'clock, no one thought there would be any problems, god we were wrong.
An eight seater white stretched limo was hired for the big day to which the grooms side would be getting to the chapel and another classic car was hired for the bridal party. You would think if any car was going to give bother it would be the classic car and not the limo which I have to say was only a couple of years old and like new.
Things started to go wrong when the grooms father rang the limo company to make sure everything was "OK". the reply he got wasn't the one he was expecting. "eh, I am awful sorry to tell you this but the driver of the eight seater limo has phoned in sick this morning and we won't be able to send it up to you" said the receptionist from the limo company. Well you can guess what the grooms father said to the receptionist, I won't repeat it as the hub will be deleted. After a short time on the phone the grooms father came back and told the groom the bad news but on a brighter note they have a driver for their 6 seater limo (which is about 8 years old) and they are sending him up to collect us along with a brand new BMW 3 series.
At this stage the time was starting to get on, coming on 11.45 and the limo company was based about 30 mile away. In reality the grooms party should have been at the chapel by now, so a decision was made to call the bridal house and inform them that the groom was going to be late. For some reason that I can't remember I was nominated to do this task, so I duly rang the number and got speaking to the brides mother, told her what had happened and that although a hiccup everything will work out and for them not to leave until we ring them and let them know we are on our way first (we can't have the bride waiting on the groom after all).
I will never forget all of us standing there looking down the road hoping the limo will come round any second. I have to tell you at this stage the grooms home house was based out in the middle of the countryside so any traffic was few and far between, any noise was expected to be the limo coming round the corner and not a tractor, quad bike or car.
At around the 12 O'Clock stage things started to get desperate, there was suggestions of taking a few of our own cars and driving down to the chapel but that was dismissed out of hand. To try and lighten the mood I stood out in the middle of the road and stuck my thumb up, trying to hitch a lift, that got a few nervous laughs. I am sure anyone that drove past was thinking to themselves "what is going on there" especially as they were heading to the chapel.
Eventually at about ten past twelve the limo and BMW showed up, when quizzed on what had taken them so long they told us they got lost.... So we told him to turn the cars in behind the house and we will all jump in and get ot the chapel, while turning the limo we made the call to the brides house to let her know we were "eventually" on our way and everything was going to be fine.
You would be forgiving in thinking that is the end of the story and that the couple got married without any more problems and lived happily every after, oh no, as the limo done a 180 in the drive the engine conked out, the driver tried the ignition but nothing happened, no turning, no noise, nothing, the battery was completely dead. All hell broke lose, "someone quick get a car up beside the limo", "hold on" said another person "bugger the limo, just jump in a car and get to the chapel", after the voices died a bit we had decided to jumpstart the limo and get to the chapel urgently.
A happy ending
We got to the chapel at about 12.25 with the photographer taking some hasty photographs before being ushered into the chapel as the bride arrived. Needles to say as soon as the groom got in the car with his new bride he grabbed the champagne bottle and poured himself a very big glass.
A great day followed with plenty of food and drink on the go, everyone had a great time and I am sure there was a lot of laughs after it about that mental morning and that it must have been the first time ever the bride had to wait on the groom.