How to kill vampires...A poem

There are certain ways to kill a vampire

Your courage I don’t have time to inspire

So listen well and listen quick

I have no intention of being a vampire picnic

The first has endured the test of time

And is an old favourite of mine

By cutting off their demonic head

You can be sure you have killed it dead

Second thing that works just right

Is to set the damn things alight

They all have a deep fear of fire

Kills nearly every type of vampire

Close your mouth and open your eyes

Can’t you hear the innocent’s cries?

It’s to time to find your backbone boy

We have a lot of evil to destroy

The third and most obvious way

Is to use the light of day

But not as easy as it sounds

As the undead like to hide underground

Four is the old stake in the heart

Parallelizes them so you can take them apart

But unlike the movies it won’t kill with one strike

And if you miss, be careful of their bite

Stop trembling and shaking your head

Fear like that will find you dead

Your only chance to survive this night

Is to listen up and don’t hesitate to fight

The most painful deaths for the demon is number five

Holy water that burns them alive

It’s a slow and torturous way to kill

But some hunters do it for the thrill

A lot of hunters, use number six

Thinking that modern guns are a quick fix

But unless you are using a shotgun or something bigger

A vampire won’t stop despite how many times you pull that trigger

Everything else you can learn as we go

I don’t have time to tell you all that I know

So remember these things and don’t get in my way

And maybe you and others will live to see the light of day…

© K.A.E Grove