I hate bloomin' Winter (With ye olde English translation!)

Taken from Ye olde English Dictionary

Bloomin' - sodden, to hate, or more to the point, bad swear words.

Mush- Face, as in, oy mate you got egg on yer mush.

Humbug- misery guts

Mojo- pride attraction as in the bees knees................

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I hate bloomin' Winter

It's such a bloomin' pain

If it ain't bloomin snowing

It's chucking down with rain

-

My clothes are all soaking

My hair is a mess

I get drips down my t-shirt

That stick to my vest

-

I hate bloomin' winter

The wind and the slush

Kids throwing the snowballs

That go straight in your mush

-

My feet feel like concrete,

Packed ready to go

with ice in my nostrils

And frost down below!

-

I traipse home in my misery

Full of humbug and woe

I can't find my door keys

They got dropped in the snow

-

So I forage and fumble

Fingers frozen with frost

My nose started running

I'm a little girl lost

-

I snatch at my hankie

Which sticks to my face

I hate bloomin' winter

This house, and this place

-

My glamour has dwindled

My mojo's all gone

I feel bloomin' ninety

sorry, I don't mean to moan

-

At last I sit by the fireside

Hot chocolate, so yum

My toes feeling cosy

I can actually feel my bum!

-

I hate bloomin winter

with blizzards outside

But here in my sanctuary

I took back my pride

-

Hot baths, and clean undies

My hair in a twirl

I look in the miirror

And see just a girl

-

I hate bloomin winter

As you probably can see

Please bring back the summer

To restore little me

Poem Copyright of M. Loveridge