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In Response to Bill’s Challenge: The Woman on the Mountaintop. Prose, by Manatita

Updated on November 6, 2014
manatita44 profile image

Manatita is an esteemed author living in London, UK. He writes spiritual books, flash fiction and esoteric poetry, his favourite genre.


In Response to Bill's Challenge, as Inspired by Annart's Original Challenge Mentioned Later on

The old man sat on a wooden stool, in a busy area of Frazackstan Airport. Head down, and pressing against the palms of his hands and knees, he felt lonely, forlorn and afraid. In this sad state of desolation, nothing was to his satisfaction –the coffee and croissant tasted awful, and the air was thick with smoke. Here in Terminal 2, everyone and everything felt hostile, and the dark drums within the restless minds of the unshaven Frazacks, echoed of every surface, and made him long for home.

Seemed like he’d been climbing mountains all his life – Dr Spazek – and somehow, this one did not appear any less arduous. He had just returned from Arstraglia, where he carried and cremated the remains of his dear wife Betsy, who had recently passed away in her sleep. Heart attack, they said it was! Now as he mulled over the circumstances of her demise, numerous reminiscences began to appear fleetingly in his troubled mind.

More mountains, he thought, but at the same time as he was dealing with this reflection, mercifully, another kind of mountain entered into his conscious mind.

Bev, Bill's Wife
Bev, Bill's Wife | Source
antelope | Source

It was William Holland, (aka Billybuc) his friend, who had told him the story of ‘the woman on the mountaintop.’ Now it came as a welcome solace; vigour entered his body, and he longed to journey home. Dr Spazek remembered the ethereal photo that Bill had shown him – that enchanting figure of ‘the woman on the mountaintop.’ To him she represented hope, that soaring attribute, that undying and much needed golden scepter which he yearned to hold on to, to soothe and calm his Spirit.

He could see her standing there, hands folded above her head, as if gazing at the infinite; it’s numerous possibilities. Once more she shone with radiance in his thoughts; danced her way into the cobwebs of his mind to grant him peace. Feeling better, he began to remember the configuration of white clouds; the vastness and freedom of the blue sky, as he wept with relief. Somewhere in the core of his being, the fragrant smell of the valley came to him; he saw the silhouette of the distant mountains, and dreamt of future sunbeams.

Such a fine woman! He listened and re-told the story to himself a thousand times! He saw her feeding the fawns; talking to the foliage; whispering comforts to the yearling antelopes beneath her feet. He reached into her Spirit, and felt the longing of a universal heart, bleeding for the joys of plenitude. There she stood, a garland inside his heart, dreaming of supernal beauty; with a large and magnanimous heart, embracing love, enchantment and delight…


All of a sudden, the old man stood bolt upright from his wooden stool! This touching story; this wondrous image; this vision of the beyond, of what could be, now stirred the life-energy in his every bone! Once more he began to look at possibilities; the audacity to dream; to fight on; he longed to share and merge, like a balm of Light, to the cosmic reality beyond. Slowly he walked through customs, headed for the gates, then the runway …

With a renewed lease of life, he strode into his plane, took his seat in a far corner near the window and headed home.

-Manatita, Bard of Solace, 4th November, 2014. Air France passenger end route to London. ©Copyrighted.

Beauty Garland


In Recognition

Bill tells us that this Hub was inspired by Ann's own Challenge included here:

THE RICHNESS OF THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE: What does it Mean to You as a Writer? Learn it Well; Use it to

Indeed he said that he was 'blown away' by it. Ann is an excellent writer and a noble Soul, and well worth reading:

I note that some really good writers have contributed to this challenge also. I commend you all, and now include the second of my humble inputs, a short story in prose. In Joy and Light.

The Woman on The Mountaintop

Some Descriptive Words for Bill's Challenge?

See results

© 2014 manatita44


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    • manatita44 profile imageAUTHOR


      3 years ago from london

      Yes, Shanmarie, so true.

      Thank you for stopping by. Much love.

    • shanmarie profile image

      Shannon Henry 

      3 years ago from Texas

      How very beautiful your words are. There is always hope.wven after profound loss.

    • manatita44 profile imageAUTHOR


      4 years ago from london

      Thank you so much Gypsy. Glad hat you liked it. Love.

    • Gypsy Rose Lee profile image

      Gypsy Rose Lee 

      4 years ago from Riga, Latvia

      Voted up and beautiful. Lived the doctor's journey and found it inspirational. Just really enjoyed this story.

    • manatita44 profile imageAUTHOR


      4 years ago from london

      Yes, Bro.

      I felt it myself. A good one, this. Thank you so much.

    • vkwok profile image

      Victor W. Kwok 

      4 years ago from Hawaii

      Splendid, Manatita! Simply splendid!

    • manatita44 profile imageAUTHOR


      4 years ago from london

      Thanks again, Eddy.

      You're so kind. Much Love, much ...

    • Eiddwen profile image


      4 years ago from Wales

      A brilliant story and voted up for sure.


    • manatita44 profile imageAUTHOR


      4 years ago from london

      Suzette, so kind of you, so sincere.

      Your heart speaks and mines offer also in silence. I tryly thank you for your noble sentiments; your contributions. In Love and Light.

      Thank You, my Dear Judah.

      A friend indeed! I know that you are an excellent poet and writer yourself. In love and harmony. Peace.

    • Jodah profile image

      John Hansen 

      4 years ago from Queensland Australia

      This is a wonderful response to Bill's challenge. A good read and very uplifting. Now I am off to read your poetic response. Well done, voted up.

    • suzettenaples profile image

      Suzette Walker 

      4 years ago from Taos, NM

      What a beautiful response to Bill's challenge. This is lovely. Your expressions of hope, peace and tranquility for this man through the photo are wonderful. My favorite line: "Danced her way into the cobwebs of his mind to grant him peace." So expressive! I so enjoyed reading this!

    • manatita44 profile imageAUTHOR


      4 years ago from london

      Gratitude lrc7815.

      Welcome and extremely pleased to have you here and yes, thanks for the link. Nice choice, eh? an old man :)

      My sincere thanks for your loving contribution and wishing you much peace.

    • lrc7815 profile image

      Linda Crist 

      4 years ago from Central Virginia

      manatita44, you paint multi-dimensional pictures with words. As I read this, I could not only feel the emotions but also the textures of an old man's wrinkled hands, the roughness of a weathered face, and more. What a beautiful response to Bill's challenge. I am so glad that your comment on my response to Bill's challenge led me here. Voted up, awesome, beautiful and adding a link to my hub as well.

    • manatita44 profile imageAUTHOR


      4 years ago from london

      Just found you, Dee.

      Sorry. Will read now.

    • manatita44 profile imageAUTHOR


      4 years ago from london

      Hi Blossom.

      Still writing? Don't recall seeing one from you. Much gratitude and much love.

      Thanks Dee.

      Did you do one? Still going through them. Catching up? I seem to remember you as my first serious friend on Hub Pages, so you will know, even before that (I just remembered the book), that I started here as a writer.

      Have a go, you're more than excellent to the challenge. Much gratitude.

    • MsDora profile image

      Dora Weithers 

      4 years ago from The Caribbean

      Short, sweet and empowering! Another great response to the challenge!

    • BlossomSB profile image

      Bronwen Scott-Branagan 

      4 years ago from Victoria, Australia

      A lovely story - thanks for sharing.

    • manatita44 profile imageAUTHOR


      4 years ago from london

      Dear Ann,

      You remain so kind to me! I value this very much. Of course your spirit is woven in all these Hubs, rather like what Phyllis has just done for America with her wonderful Hub. Ancestral Lands of Woven tapestry, I believe. Higher blessings.

    • manatita44 profile imageAUTHOR


      4 years ago from london


      I am so grateful that you are a fan. This encourages me to continue; to serve. My profound gratitude.

      Yes, my Brave warrior. I do both with ease. I'm also conscious of the Source, of where they come from ... you are so kind to me. Much mehta.

      Thanks Bill,

      I will look you up for my cup of tea some time. He he he ...

      Seriously, Bill, you and Bev are more than worthy, and you might say that it is the sublime beauty of your combined Spirit that sent me lovingly here. God bless, Bro.

      Yes, Maria,

      You guys picked up on Hope. I wrote purposely for the old man to remember this; to end in a sweet and loving way. God bless your beauty-heart.

      Thank You, Alicia.

      Great to have you! I so appreciate this. Billy and I and a few more, I'm sure, do love this word 'hope.' Gratitude.

      Hi Jamie,

      I tell Bill that I started at 4 years old in the Caribbean sunshine, and quickly ran through Keats, Chaucer, Shakespeare, Milton, Blake, Wordsworth .... time for some American ones: Edgar Allan Poe, Bradbury, Dickenson, Wadsworth ... you get the drift? (smile) I am an old Soul. Hey he, I'm having fun, just like at work. Of course only with my good brother-friend. Much Gratitude.

    • annart profile image

      Ann Carr 

      4 years ago from SW England

      Wonderful story about this man. Who could not be inspired by the photo of this amazing lady?

      Thank you so much for mentioning me too; I'm honoured. I love all these challenges but I never thought of doing one, until I came to the end of that hub and decided to use my favourite photo! I was amazed at the response. This one has instigated so much too.

      Your poem was great and it's wonderful to see your prose for a change - it attains the same high standard as your poetry. Great!


    • jhamann profile image

      Jamie Lee Hamann 

      4 years ago from Reno NV

      Well written story! The story flowed so naturally from beginning to end and kept my attention. An excellent take on this challenge. Jamie

    • AliciaC profile image

      Linda Crampton 

      4 years ago from British Columbia, Canada

      This is an interesting story with a very hopeful and inspiring ending. It's a lovely contribution to Bill's challenge!

    • Maria Antonia profile image

      Antoinette Lee Toscano 

      4 years ago from Raleigh, NC

      What a beautiful story that epitomizes what it is to find the hope to keep going.

    • billybuc profile image

      Bill Holland 

      4 years ago from Olympia, WA

      Not only are you a quality poet, my friend, but your prose is beautiful as well. Thank you for this bonus entry in the challenge. It really is exquisite.

    • bravewarrior profile image

      Shauna L Bowling 

      4 years ago from Central Florida

      This is beautiful, Manatita. You're as good at writing prose as you are poetry.

    • liesl5858 profile image

      Linda Bryen 

      4 years ago from United Kingdom

      Hello! Manatita44, that's why I follow you because you inspire other writers like me. I enjoyed so much reading your story and thank you. Voted up and well done.

    • manatita44 profile imageAUTHOR


      4 years ago from london

      Dear Rubs, great on you. Keep the hope going. You and I, and a few more here or we would crumble. Speaking in general. As for the Hub, thank you so much for your loving sentiment. In Love and Light.

      P.S: Read my book: My Guru Sri Chinmoy: Life and Teachings

      WillStarr, great to have you and for you excellent contribution. I do have a friend in Phoenix. Much peace.

    • WillStarr profile image


      4 years ago from Phoenix, Arizona

      Excellent! Voted up!

    • always exploring profile image

      Ruby Jean Richert 

      4 years ago from Southern Illinois

      This is one of your very best Manatita! When you write words of hope you open the door for the lonely and forgotton to catch a glimmer of light once more. Beautifully penned. Shared on Twitter. Bravo!


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