ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel

Just an average day...! I thought so.

Updated on April 30, 2012

Went to a bar to drink my life away

Was sitting down next to a pretty blonde

A killer look, wishing my mother in law was gone..!

She seemed to recognize this stud with a thong

"Are you the father of my kids?"

she asked sure of her... pointing out at me.

"Oh Lord have mercy," I said

"Why this is happening to me?

End of the year, broke and in need...!"

Recalling my 12 months of bachelor's partying good deeds

I could swear she was the one I met and came to me...

"Oh! Got it! You are the stripper that I met at Sam's," I said

The one that gave me the joy of my life and that stupid bonnet

"I don't think so. All I know is that you are the dad of one of my kids"

"Woman please, it's gotta be you!: blond, tall, the one that I ever dreamed of"

"Well handsome dad, don't deny your kid!" she screamed.

"Woman let's be real... You want this thing to happen again?" I said

"Forget it then. You are not in your right mind"

"Just tell me, you want to recall that night, right?"

She got furious and grabbed her bag

I wanted to know if I was the father of that child!

"Since he is mine, prove it young lady"

She was about to hit me back so hard...

"You are not man enough to admit it now!"

"If you don't prove it, we might as well say bye, Ciao!"

She took a picture out of her pink purse, inside her bag

"This is the proof, so you won't get so mad!"

"Wait a minute: A bunch of kids and a teacher?

There is my Josh, right in the middle of that picture"

"Yes Mr. Cross, You are the dad of one of my kids

I wanted to explain, but you came out with the truth"

"So sorry, that blond lap dancer was just a gift.

A pay back from my pal John Paul Ortiz."

"Well I'm Nancy, Just argued with Hubby as you see

and wanted to take some free time way," she said

"Well hopefully you won't tell this to my son Tomorrow"

"Rest assure Mr. Cross. You might be at the wrong place I think"

"What's the matter Nancy, please!" I said

Why don't come to meet a girl who is my friend," she replied.

"So? Nothing wrong with all this right?", I said

"This is a bar for ladies seeking ladies, Mr. Cross"

"Oh, no!!, and I already drank more than I thought

Courtesy of this Lady Gaga, who missed her call"

"Can We keep this as a secret too Mr, Cross?"

"Sure Nancy, had to get my wife this Winnie-the-pooh,

just hold on to those beers and say bye to that chick friend of you!"

I left all sweat up, avoiding all that crowd that held me back that night

No more drinks for free from drag queens in disguise!


This website uses cookies

As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at:

Show Details
HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the or domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)
ClickscoThis is a data management platform studying reader behavior (Privacy Policy)