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LOSING YOUR HEAD...by b. Malin

Updated on January 6, 2012

IT COULD HAPPEN TO YOU...

Hi everyone, I've been gone for awhile...lots of "Hectic Things" going on in my life. I'm sure that they will continue for awhile longer. So today, I said aloud, "TIME OUT"...I miss "Hub Pages" and all my Hub Friends... So, Here's a little "Ditty" from a walk on the Beach...Don't Judge...this could happen to you, or to me.

I'm walking along the Beach the other day. The name of the Beach, and the person I encountered on that Beach, names, are not used, to protect that person, and that Beach. And really it doesn't matter what Beach it was...Right? Anyway, I'm sure you're saying, "Come on b. Malin, just get on with this "Hub tale"

Ok, ok...So I'm walking along the Beach feeling a bit overwhelmed myself, because Lover Man and I have been "Condo" Shopping, for a "little place" with a view of Water, that we could call our own here in Florida. We looked in "Delray" with a Realtor who found us a place that met our requirements. She rushed us to sign a Contract before the end of the year, having faxed it to us THE DAY BEFORE... We said "WHOA...not so FAST"...and it's a good thing we did, because SHE had neglected to tell US, that SAME CONDO we were buying, was also being rented out as of Jan 1st until March 31st..."HUH"? we said... good thing we didn't sign on to buy...for we would have INHERITED a TENANT! Oh and She and the other Realtor a Bonus! We dropped that Realtor.

All of a sudden I'm looking at this guy buried in the sand with his HEAD sitting next to him...Now I'm thinking, what do I say to him..."Hey guy, I think you lost your head"? He saves me the trouble by saying..."Yes, I've lost my head, well not really, I mean it's sitting here next to my body". "So it is" I reply trying to sound like this is a NORMAL sight to see. Meanwhile, he has put his arm around it. "Do you want me to go for Help"? I ask. He replies, "aren't you curious how I wound up like this"? "Well, only if you want to tell me, I didn't want to be nosey", I say. "I've lost my head every now and then, why just the other day"...My voice trails off, because I know I'm beginning to sound silly, and this guy needs help.

He clears his throat, which was an interesting sight to see, and says. "I lost my head in a Business deal, got in over my head...My wife said, I should have told her, TWO HEADS are better than one...Now she's left me and here I am...I actually woke up this morning here...Headless in the sand". I almost wanted to say, this is a joke, right, you're pulling my leg"...But I thought better of it.

"Look I said, I'll go for help, but before I do, would you mind if I snapped a picture of you with my Cell Phone Camera? No one's ever going to believe this". And so I did. As I was walking away he yelled to me, "Hey, what's your name"? "b. Malin, I replied, and yours I said? "Joe" he replied. (Of course that was not his real name). It was at that point that I noticed his head was turned around and FACING ME! "OMG, how did you do that, turn your head all the way around"? He was now smiling at me, as he replied, "I don't know...I guess I'm starting to have a Good Day! Hurry back b. Malin...Hurry back"!


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    • PDXKaraokeGuy profile image

      Justin W Price 5 years ago from Juneau, Alaska

      well, I'm sure you could google them...

    • b. Malin profile image
      Author

      b. Malin 5 years ago

      Hi Minds Eye53, so Glad you Enjoyed. Interesting that you found my Hub Inspirational, I like that thought! I'd also like to say, Thank you, for your Votes.

    • My Minds Eye53 profile image

      My Minds Eye53 5 years ago from Tennessee

      After I read the "bathroom" story, I had to come read this one. It's great! I also found it inspirational. Funny things happen to me all the time. Voted up and funny. Also shared.

    • b. Malin profile image
      Author

      b. Malin 5 years ago

      Oh...Ok KaraokeGuy, I certainly feel Honored by the Compliment! Now if I could just get hold of a few of his "sketches"....

    • PDXKaraokeGuy profile image

      Justin W Price 5 years ago from Juneau, Alaska

      b, i was just generalizing. it had a silverstein vibe. all it was missing was the cartoon sketches... :-0

    • b. Malin profile image
      Author

      b. Malin 5 years ago

      Hi Suzie, So Glad you Enjoyed and gave me a Big WOW...Thank You!

      Funny you should say that Sharyn, because I did have a Bathroom Trip while out shopping that could be my next Hub! So Glad you Enjoyed this one, and that I could make you Giggle!

    • Sharyn's Slant profile image

      Sharon Smith 5 years ago from Northeast Ohio USA

      You know B, you could take a trip to the bathroom and make a super story out of it :) Seriously, this was very enjoyable. Thanks for the giggles!

      Sharyn

    • Suzie ONeill profile image

      Suzie ONeill 5 years ago from Lost in La La Land

      Wow... what a story. LOL Thanks for sharing!

    • b. Malin profile image
      Author

      b. Malin 5 years ago

      Hi Leni Sands, missed your Comments, Welcome Back! I'm so sorry you weren't having such a good day, so Glad I could make you Laugh. I will stop by to say "Hello" to you.

    • leni sands profile image

      Leni Sands 5 years ago from UK

      Love the hub, love the pic's. Love the laugh - perfect end to an otherwise imperfect day. Thank you

    • b. Malin profile image
      Author

      b. Malin 5 years ago

      Hi PegCole so Glad you got a Laugh or two, that makes me Happy! Yes, Camera Phones are a Blessing to us writers.

      You did find a place, needs some work, but has a View, so we're feeling Lucky! And Yes, we kept a Cool Head during Negotiations!

      Ok KaraokeGuy, you know I'm going to ask, "Which Poem?" of Shel Silverstein's, or are you just generalizing? Thanks for the Compliment, so appreciated.

    • PDXKaraokeGuy profile image

      Justin W Price 5 years ago from Juneau, Alaska

      what a great picture, and the story, of course, made me think of an adult version of a Shel Silverstein poem!

    • PegCole17 profile image

      Peg Cole 5 years ago from Dallas, Texas

      This was hilarious B. Thank goodness for camera phones, there when you need them. And the photos were priceless. What a funny story.

      Boy, those realtors should be counting their blessings with a live customer who wants to buy, not sell! Hope you find the place of your dreams! Remember to keep your head during the negotiations. Hahaaa.

    • b. Malin profile image
      Author

      b. Malin 5 years ago

      Oh Nell, you Devil you! I'm so glad you enjoyed my Humor on this Hub...After all, it could happen to anyone! We now have a Wonderful Realtor and think we've found our place in the Sun!

      Hi "Dream On", Let us all make it a Fun Filled Year! So glad I gave you a Head start! That perfect "Condo" is just around the corner in my Hubs...It should be a Fun write!

    • DREAM ON profile image

      DREAM ON 5 years ago

      I think you are ahead of your time on this one.Good luck with your condo.I can imagine all the fun and sun in Florida.Nice to see you and the New Year is already looking real promising.I read your hub and now I have a headstart on making this year funnier than ever.

    • Nell Rose profile image

      Nell Rose 5 years ago from England

      Hi, that was great! lol! I would have had to reach down and tickle him behind the ear! ha ha! just to see how quickly he got out! loved the photo and your great story to go with it, good luck with the Realtors!

    • b. Malin profile image
      Author

      b. Malin 5 years ago

      Hi Thesesus, Thanks for your Thoughtful Comment, hope all is well. I would also like to wish you a Happy, Healthy, 2012, my Friend.

      I really get into my "Characters" in my Hubs...they really do Talk through me! Yes, it would be Fun Bluestar to meet someday, who knows? Life is Long! A very Happy Healthy 2012 to you and your lovely Family.

      Hi Movie Master...Those Photos made my Hub, so glad you Enjoyed, and Thank You so much for your Vote. A very Happy and Healthy 2012 dear Friend!

    • b. Malin profile image
      Author

      b. Malin 5 years ago

      Hi Marcoujor, so Glad my Hub left you Smiling. We have a lot of work ahead of us with this Condo...Where to start...Where to start! But it's like a Diamond before the cutting stage.

      A very Happy and Healthy 2012 to you and yours my Friend.

      Hi Vocalcoach, yes, I'm back, but will probably only write once a week until we are done Fixing that Condo...My Hubs will reflect those Fun, (Ha!) filled times.

      This is a hard time of year for those who have lost a Loved one...My sister with her daughter and you with your beloved Son...So I'm glad I was able to make you Laugh a little. I hope this year of 2012, will be a Happier, Healthy one for you dear Friend.

    • Movie Master profile image

      Movie Master 5 years ago from United Kingdom

      A great laugh, terrific photos - voting up and awesome!

    • thebluestar profile image

      Annette Donaldson 5 years ago from Northern Ireland

      Ahhh b. you can tell a funny tale and make it sound so real. I LMAO. You never change hunnie, maybe one day we will rub shoulders and I will steal some of your humour. Until then keep em coming. :)

    • theseus profile image

      theseus 5 years ago from philippines

      Just what I need at the moment..I very good read.

      Thank you..

      God bless.

    • vocalcoach profile image

      Audrey Hunt 5 years ago from Nashville Tn.

      Oh b. Malin...I've missed you and am so glad to see you're back! I'm so happy that you and Lover Man are going to have your very own condo. Best of luck with that.

      This is hilarious and the perfect way to end my day. It's been a rough one and these photos are just what I needed. Thank you so much. Happy New Year and voted up!

      vocalcoach~

    • marcoujor profile image

      Maria Jordan 5 years ago from Jeffersonville PA

      b. Malin,

      I believed you....are just what I needed to close my evening with a big smile! Voted UP & FAB.

      May you and Lover Man have a fabulous new year. Best of luck with the N Palm Beach condo, mar.

    • b. Malin profile image
      Author

      b. Malin 5 years ago

      Hi Genna, Love your new Photo. I think we may have a GOOD deal on a Condo, in N. Palm Beach with a view...that needs some WORK...a diamond in the rough...I see some Fun Hubs coming...

      Thanks for all your Lovely, Comments, and stay warm!

    • b. Malin profile image
      Author

      b. Malin 5 years ago

      Hi Breakfastpops, it was actually COLD here today...temp in the low 50's...Ah...Anyway glad my Hub warmed you up with a laugh!

      Oh Froggy I've missed you too...So you don't think I talked to this guy?...Mmmm...In my CRAZY Imaginative Mind, I have!

      Hi Lyric, it's Great to be back among my Writer Friends...I Love you Guys! And of course I Love to make you Smile!

      Thanks for Laughing Acaetnna...Music to my Writer's Ears!

      Hi "Always Exploring", You are so Right...Only in Florida...It's a Writer's Dream here!

      Hey Drby, I think we've all been there...losing our Heads...Those Photos made me say, I've got to write about it...and so i did! So glad you Enjoyed!

    • Genna East profile image

      Genna East 5 years ago from Massachusetts, USA

      Good to see you back, B. I wish you better luck in finding that perfect condo; certain realtors can be a little devious.

      This was such a funny, enjoyable hub; what a hilarious and odd experience; these are moments you have to capture on camera. It’s freezing here, in New England, and those warm beaches (with or without the head) were a sight for sore eyes, as well as your delightful return. :-)

    • b. Malin profile image
      Author

      b. Malin 5 years ago

      Hey Thanks Rosemay, sometimes we don't know where a Hub write will take us...I certainly didn't know until the end. I just knew I had to use those pictures. Thanks for Enjoying!

      Flora, Amen to BAD Realtors...Our new one seems to be a nice guy, who actually LISTENS...Hoping we have a deal coming through!

      Oh but he was Mackbirdks...Figure of Speech that is! So glad you had a Laugh and the Photo so Inspired me!

      Thanks Cheryl for you Fun Comments!

      Hi Eddy, so Glad you Enjoyed and Thanks so much for your Vote!

      Hey Dexter, so glad you stopped by and I could give you a Laugh!

    • drbj profile image

      drbj and sherry 5 years ago from south Florida

      You have given new meaning, b. Malin, to the expression, "losing your head." Those photos are priceless and so is this hub, m'dear.

    • always exploring profile image

      Ruby Jean Fuller 5 years ago from Southern Illinois

      OMG, This is funny, only in Fl. HaHa..Thank's for the laugh...Cheers

    • acaetnna profile image

      acaetnna 5 years ago from Guildford

      Oh what a laugh! Great work here, thanks for giving me such fun today!

    • thelyricwriter profile image

      Richard Ricky Hale 5 years ago from West Virginia

      Up, funny, and awesome. Another great story B Malin. You always know how to put a smile on our faces. Glad to have you back though. Good to know everything is ok. Have a great New Year and best wishes to you and Lover.

    • The Frog Prince profile image

      The Frog Prince 5 years ago from Arlington, TX

      malin - If you aren't pulling my leg I think you've had a little too much hootch lately. Which is it? LMAO

      Too funny and definitely a b. malin original. Welcome back. I've missed ya Girl!

      The Frog

    • breakfastpop profile image

      breakfastpop 5 years ago

      You are the perfect remedy to this utterly freezing day. Laughing warmed me up!

    • Dexter Yarbrough profile image

      Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States

      Great, b.Malin! Great! I needed this laugh!

    • Eiddwen profile image

      Eiddwen 5 years ago from Wales

      A brilliant hub and thank you so much for sharing.

      I award this one an up up and away here.

      Take care and enjoy your day.

      Eddy.

    • profile image

      Cheryl Kapelner-Champ 5 years ago

      Cute, love the adventure. What a Beach Boy, & what a tale! More, we want more..!

      Love yaz, good story.

    • mckbirdbks profile image

      mckbirdbks 5 years ago from Emerald Wells, Just off the crossroads,Texas

      At least he wasn't in over his head. Very funny stuff. Great photo.

    • FloraBreenRobison profile image

      FloraBreenRobison 5 years ago

      I've never been buried in the sand, but I know plenty of bad realters...I'm related to a former one.

    • Rosemay50 profile image

      Rosemary Sadler 5 years ago from Hawkes Bay - NewZealand

      Definitely voting up, just for my laugh for the day. You always manage to bring smiles and laughter. The way you told the story was superb.

      Those photos are so good.

      I smiled at Susan's tale not funny at the time though.

    • b. Malin profile image
      Author

      b. Malin 5 years ago

      Ouch Susan, Ouch! I'm so glad you Enjoyed my Hub and likewise, I Enjoyed your related story as well...the things we do as kids! Thanks for sharing.

      Hi Alocsin, friends usually send funny pictures, and I select the ones I think I could use in a Hub. Thanks so much for the Vote and thinking my Hub Fun!

      Hi James. Thank you so much for your Vote, your Thoughts and liking my Photos! I must stop by your Hubs as well.

    • JamesPoppell profile image

      JamesPoppell 5 years ago

      Definitely a vote up. I like your photos and your energy...lol. Thanks!

    • alocsin profile image

      alocsin 5 years ago from Orange County, CA

      OMG, where do you get your photos. Quite a good story, accompanies as usual by perfect photographs. Voting this Up and Funny.

    • Just Ask Susan profile image

      Susan Zutautas 5 years ago from Ontario, Canada

      LOL, Your hub reminded me of when I was a lot younger and we would go to Old Orchard Beach with a ton of family members. One day my cousins decided it would be fun to bury my entire body except for my head. Well it was fun until they threw a towel over it and someone walked on my face :) Funny now but at the time I didn't think so.