LOVE: The Roller Coaster Ride
Why do I allow you to make my life a roller coaster ride?
It is a constant up and down, highs and lows,
Never knowing what each day will bring….
I’ve allowed you to do this to me.
I just don’t know why.
Is it for love?
Is it for fear of being completely alone?
Am I hoping you will realize you do care?
Why do I torture myself so?
I hate the torment of the lies and deceit.
I trusted you in the beginning, but now it’s lost.
The trust I had has been broken… time and time again.
Each time I think I can trust again.. You just disappear without an explanation …. Disappear without a trace.
How can one build a relationship without trust?
My question is…. Why do you continue to come back again?
You obviously have no feelings for me……….. So why?
If you cared, you would not disappear for days with no call…. No text… no communication of any sort.
Even when you are with me… I still feel alone.
You make me feel completely lost and alone…
I sense you want me, but not to be with me… so how is that… and what are your true feelings for me?
Where do I fit into your life?
Am I just a convenience or am I just an option … what is my place in your life?
I really do not know….
You make me feel so helpless.. … and I hate feeling helpless.
I love to be touched, and kissed.
Body language tells all… that’s what you always said.
And yours speaks volumes…. Why will I not tell you what I need to say?
Why can I not let you go?
Why do I continue to stay on this ride?
Once again I allowed the ride to continue..
Even after I have said I would never allow you to torment my heart again.
This time was different, you were so attentive
Kisses so tender and gentle…
You brought me to life over and over again all night long..
Yet when the day dawned once again,
You were gone.
Will this be the last of the roller coaster ride?
You say I will never hear from you again….
Will that really be the end of our up and down relationship?
Or will the ride never end?