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Let me write my Love Story
My Idea of a happy heart whether in love or simply inspired
Why am I writing this?
Because of someone at the other side of the world who never knew I exist.. Nope I am not in love with him because falling in love for me is something profound and cannot be associated with two persons in separate worlds, where two different languages became a great barrier, not to question our culture and religion too. But I know sometimes, in LOVE those things are immaterial, but in our case it is indeed impossible, for he is there and I am here, and he is a very popular actor, that I know I am not alone who sees him as a goodlooking individual; but he suddenly became an inspiration that unbelievable it may seem, I glow just with the "Thoughts" of him.
A writer who loves to write about her dogs
I write about a lot of things
I believe I am a natural writer, regularly writing about animals, specifically dogs. Writing about dogs is like writing without effort at all. But in Hubpages, I consider myself a writer in general. Here I don't just write about dogs, I write about places, things that please me, those that I like, my personal feelings and beliefs. It is in Hubpages where "He", my future leading man, accidentally read about me, got fascinated with the passion I have for my dogs, for the fields that I like.....and for the way I write....
Who is He?
The man I am thinking about
He is a popular actor from another country, her leading lady in one drama is my real favorite, but getting familiar with him while watching the drama regularly made me like him too. Aside from his soap opera, I only have the internet which provided me access on some information about him, and I wonder if he understands or speaks English? Their language is something I cannot understand but I am interested to learn it only if time permits... In other words, it's very clear for me... I cannot fall in love with this guy, he is just another crush or someone I admire, and of course, the nerve of me to think of him to get attracted by me..... before me he can possibly meet more beautiful women in his country... it's like the same belief that I have that maybe it will always be fine to marry someone in your own country..
He Found Me
He finally has his freetime after series of tapings and shootings, so he browsed the net to find out what was written about him or how his fans are nowadays. Click after Click he was led to the link of a hubber Maria Cecilia, who has hub about her favorite actress, the soap opera where "He" is one of the leading men. He smiles knowing that many fans were reacting to thier drama, and they are from different countries like Philippines, Indonesia, Romania etc. Little did he know, he was already reading all the hubs by Maria Cecilia, but what attracted him the most is her love for her dogs... and he created an account in hubpages not stating his real identity just to react to the writer's hubs.. and that started the friendship. His Pen Name "Tim".
Friendship in spite of distance
Friendship via Hubpages
The Actor or "Tim", became Maria Cecilia's regular follower, he posted comments everytime she has a new story, though not so good in English they managed to communicate. Tim's busy schedule did not stop him from checking hubpages from time to time. Until thier communications expanded to exchanging emails, etc...Tim's shared personal things about himself except real name, and his work as an actor. On Maria's part, Tim believed that everything she shared is valid.
Though communication is not regular they were able to update one another thru email or hubpages. They chat thru YM if they have the luxury of time
Chatting and revelation
Tim: there is something you need to know
Maria: yes tell me
Tim: My real name and Identity, why havent you asked for it...?
Maria: Why did you share something untrue?
Tim: Everything is true except my real name and my job
Maria: I cant get it? so Tim is not your real name, so you are going to tell me now...
TIm: I'm Richard Kim (actor's real name)...
Maria: no kidding, same name as one of my favorite actors....
Tim: I am the one
Maria: hahaha you're funny, running out of jokes ?
Tim: It's really me, see, you don't believe me now. It i tell you from the start who am i, definitely you will not believe me..
Maria: Come on tim, we are okey right? thanks for making me laugh really hahaha (LoL)
Tim: How can I make you believe? aren't you surprised why I know so much about him when you asked before
Maria: Yes I remember that, I even asked you if you were a gay (LOL).
Tim: ok you turn on your pc camera so you will see who I am....
Maria: are you serious? can you tell me why so urgent to be recognized by me?
Tim: Because I am visiting your country 2 weeks from now for a promotion of my next soap opera..
Maria: (LoL) more more, very convincing....
Tim: oh Aigoo... Thru YM Messenger showed himself
Maria: (surprise) come on it can't be you, this can't be true., this is a joke.. okey tthis ime you won... you Koreans do look alike sometimes...
Tim: come on you still dont believe.... okey show you something...(got a props from the soap opera where Maria first like him)
Maria: hahaha stop it, I am having stomach ache laughing...ok so you are going here in my country,
Tim: Yes and I want to meet you...
Maria: No problem with that....but how will I know if it's you...
Tim: foolish questions.. give me your cellphone number I will call you once I am settled
Maria though not convince that she was talking to her favorite actor, assumed it will be part of the surprise of her friend tim, she believed that he is really coming to the Philippines.
Arrival and TV Guestings
Richard Kim finally arrived in the Philippines, and still Maria thought it was just coincidental to Tim's arrival... Then her cellphone rang,
Tim: It's me I am already here..
Maria: So where are you? How do you want us to meet?
Tim: after my TV guesting in GMA I will call you again? so watch wait I dont know the program's name I will just text it to you.... okey... bye for now
Maria: This tim really don't give it a rest... still playing that Richard Kim joke...
Few minutes later, Richard or Tim texted the TV program where he will be guestings, and Maria was just surprised to see her favorite actor Richard KIm as a guest and even greeted her too live on national TV....she begun to ask herself who really Tim is? he maybe is the Production assistant of Richard Kim, that is why he almost knew everything about him, but never she entertained the thought that she is actually talking to the actor..
Who is Tim really?
Maria went to the Five Star Hotel where Tim and company stayed... Approached the customer service and told them she had an appointment with Richard Kim, and the woman said,"Oh yes you are Maria Cecilia, he is expecting you". then she called up Richard Kim's Room and told her Maria's presence... then turned to Maria and said, somebody will pick you up from here...
Maria in her thought, "this is probably Tim, he is really with Richard Kim".
Man : Ms. Maria
Maria: Yes I am... you probably is Tim... you are tim?
Man: No mam I am Richard Kim's PA, he sent me here to send you to his room.. he is TIM...
At Richard Kim's hotel room
Maria was just astonished to see her favorite actor smiling at her, approaching her, he actually greeted her with a hug...
That started a stronger friendship
Good Communication and Rapport
Happier to communicate in person
It took a while before Maria went back to her senses, and she came back to her old self, the smart humorous Maria, that made "Tim" laugh.. Maria was just so happy to know how fun to be with her favorite actor, that he is still a human being after all...
On a day before Richard's return to his country, he texted Maria saying this "I am leaving tomorrow Morning, why not drop by here tonight?, Maria texted back saying "oh my we haven't discussed about it, I am not prepared to go there!."
Richard replied "how dare you.... your friend is leaving tomorrow and you don't want to see him? we both don't know when will I return here in your country"
Maria replied "Resenting are you? you did not tell me that I needed to go there before you.... ok ok I will be there but please no night outs I need to go to work early"
Richard said " OK just be here".
Maria and Richard and company just had dinner and a little chat then when Maria was about to leave, Richard gave her a huge properly sealed box and said.
Richard : Promise me you'll only open this once you're home
Maria: okey whatever is this thanks, (hugged and kissed Richard on his cheek)
Richard and company sent off maria to hotel lobby where a car waited to bring Maria home, Richard grabbed Maria by the hand before she rides the car and kissed her on her cheek and said "take care and please get in touch often".
Good relationship starts with good friendship
What's inside the box
Maria opened the box immediately upon arriving home, there was a card attached to it, written by Richard
"So that we can always chat online as often as we want to without you leaving your dogs, in the comfort of your home, we can chat and I can finally meet your loveable dogs on line.. I was planning to buy this with you so that you can choose that brand you like, but I know you will beg off, I mentioned this too you before I arrived but you refused. You deserve this.. you are a good writer, and you are more admirable in person..." Maria knew it was a laptop computer, days before his arrival they were arguing about it.... she refused him giving him a favor like this.
Maria was overwhelmed and called up Richard Kim in his cellphone
Maria: Richard, I am overwhelmed, thanks
Richard: Did you like it?
Maria: Yes but I really appreciate your note the most.... I guess I am just lucky to meet you and be your friend..
Richard: I am happy to meet you too... We will still see each other Maria, Ill promise you that...
Maria just feel a certain joy in her heart... ..feels like closer to heaven...
Days and months passed, the two remained friends and became even closer..... true enough, it was not the last time that Richard Kim visited the Philippines and each time he does, he sees to it that he will meet Maria, and spend most of the days with her. But they just remained friends.
Richard Kim knows what he feels for Maria. Something deeper than friendship... but what bothers him is he can't read Maria... he knows she cares for him, and knows no other man in her life at present, but he is not sure if she loves him enough and what will her reaction will be in case he tells her.. but he needs to tell her now, if she's not okey with it then at least she will know what he feels for him, and maybe they can remain friends...
A night before his departure for his country, Maria and Richard had dinner as usual\that's where Richard decided to tell Maria what he feels for her..
Maria: you look so serious are you sick?
Richard: Maria I love you... you knew it I guess?
Maria: though not surprised became speechless.... yes I know because we love our friends right...?
Richard: but you know that's not the kind of love I am talking about.... (staring at Maria)
Maria: Speechless.... staring at richard then bow her head as if trying to find answers on top of the dining table
Richard: Let's just confirm it to one another... if you feel the same then let's start to act more than friends.... dont you feel the same...
Maria: Richard, it wont be that easy....
Richard: Let's not talk of what easy or hard... can we talk first of our feelings? if we feel the same then after that we cant talk how are we going to make this relationship work and let's remedy what ever fear you feel inside..
Maria: if I have a feeling for you? ... your presense in my life overwhelms me so much that at times it does not feel so real anymore.... as friends I guess we are okey, but as lovers? do you think it will work? I think we are a world a part... you're heaven and I am earth.....that's the distance the I see whenever I think of our love's possibility...
Richard: Just tell me you love me too, then let's settle your difficulty one after another
Maria was already home, contemplating on her conversation with Richard Kim. She remembered very well what she told Richard
Maria: I love you too Richard but....
Maria: Let's not discuss it now... I will need to think of it one by one before telling them to you..for the meantime let's just enjoy each other's company just the same.
Richard: can you say it again please... at least let me know...
Maria: looking at Richard... at first I thought I was just elated considering your status, but knowing you Richard and how you are to me, made me love you more...
Richard: Hold Maria's hands
Maria: you are right, I may have multitude of hesitations, but let's give way for our feelings for now...
The thought that Richard Kim loves her made Maria's heart overflowing with Joy, telling herself,
"Maria enjoy the feeling now, think of your hesitations and doubts later... just a bit later.... he loves you... you never forced him to love you,nor you put potion into his drink.....and you too never planned to fall in love with him..... and your choosy dog Peso seemed to like him, haven't you ask him if he is the one? Peso hates human males, your water delivery man for almost a decade he still hates until now? but why is he so fond of Richard Kim whom he just met, Isn't he the first male that he allowed to walk him during your last Dog Walking activities with your Dog Lovers Group? Don't you think it's fate?
In spite of her doubts and fears that beclouded her thoughts, Maria is happy...and she is still convincing herself that she is not dreaming....she did pray for someone in her life but Richard Kim is just too much for a simple lady like her... she knows she has enough beauty to captivate a man's heart, but not that beautiful to be Richard Kim's special someone.... This can't be true..... this can;t be true. Thinking of Richard's family added tremor to her shaking heart.... his friends and family daunt her.... add the comment of jealous fans... she read previous article about Richard and former girlfriend, and read few of his fans' comments like how they never found her beautiful, that she looks cold, when at Maria's eyes the woman is almost close to perfection....Maria is now wondering what will they say about her? she's chubby....she's not that pretty....and what ever.
How about their languages? Korean sounds interesting but learning it won't be easy, at least Richard is studying english now, and he told her he is doing it to adjust to her. How about thier Religions, who will adjust to whom, would it be alright to maintain individual beliefs?
The Distance, Is she ready to leave her country her dogs? or Is she thinking advance? Only God knows if the relationship will go that far? for how long will Richard understand her love for her dog Peso? for how long will he stay to please her....?
Richard is like a knight in shining armor. Will he remain that way in case Maria decided to settle with him in Korea. Will she have a different story from fellow filipinos who are married to Koreans, who expressed their disappointments in some filipino forums.
Then Maria realizes she is thinking too advance.....and she is just pressuring herself... Richard is right... one by one they will settle all her fears and hesitations......
Richard Kim's perspective
On his way home, Richard was thinking of his conversation with Maria... He loves Maria, He is sure of that.... He too asked himself many times why it led to that feeling, but he just shrugged his shoulder and tell himself,"it's probably fate". Just like Maria, he too didn't plan to fall in love with her. All he knew is Maria made him feel comfortable, and although Maria admitted that she is a "fan", she never really made him feel like she put him in a pedestal. She treated him as the "Tim" that follows all her hubs and once she got adjusted with the truth that he is "actually" Richard Kim, she kiddingly said, so "you want special treatment from me?. The thought of her first meeting with him made him smile. Maria may not be strikingly beautiful, but her smile is what made her prettier in his eyes. For him she gets more beautiful the longer you stare at her.. But above all, he never noticed the time when he is with her... Since the first day they met personally, he can't recall any dull moment with her... they may have some trouble communicating sometimes because of language differences but it just added to the enjoyment of being with her... They seemed to click in so many things...
Yes Maria is so different... She is not the type to enjoy riding one's popularity, She went out with him not because he is Richard Kim the Actor, but the Tim she knew as her friend, who appreciates all her passions, may it be about writing, dogs and photography...
He met plenty of girls and had relationship with most of them, but Maria is different.....she never pressured him to have a relationship, in fact in their last communication, it looked like he was the one who pressured her to upgrade thier relationship in the next level. But everything about them came out naturally.... Maria never fails to make him feel better.....
He is sure that Maria loves him too but he can feel her hesitations.. If it's the same hesitations that he felt before he decided to tell her about his feelings, he will surely help Maria to overcome it. He used to wonder if the relationship of two from different countries will work, knowing at this moment, no one among them can choose one from another.... He knew from the start that Maria has difficulty going on vacation because of love ones, how much more leaving them for good.... he too can't just leave his country. But he just can't give up Maria for that... there must be a solution, even if that solution can be good for the time being... so he made it a part of his life to visit Maria's country as often as possible, telling Maria of other reasons why he visited the country but not telling her she is the main reason why it is becoming too frequent. He knew she will not like him spending so much just to be with her.
I love you Maria, together we will answer all your hesitations... let's just believe that if we are not meant for each other, even if we stay in the same country our relationship will not work... but so far we are okey.... as we are... I hope you are the one... maybe you are the one I am looking for.... the one who loves me but never demand too much from me... the one who never pressures me to get married, but made me realized instead that I need to get married because I found the one, though that one has hesitations, that one who hesitates is the one I wanted to bring in the altar with me.... but looks like convincing you wont be that easy..... I wont pressure you Maria, coz I know the feeling of being pressured in a relationship.... and I don't want to lose you for that reason... I will follow everything that will be comfortable for you......if that would be the only way for you to stay with me....
Working on a new relationship...
It's different when you finally admitted your feelings to someone, and you both agreed to have a relationship. It's like a bond instantly created between the two of you, and you'll end up realizing how you miss him more when he is not with you.. sometime she just does not like the feeling of expecting more from Richard... how she now wishes to recieve text messages from him, telling her to go online so they can chat or see each other again ... But she knows Richard is a busy person, and now that he knows him more, her heart felt elated that Richard really gave her his precious time.....then suddenly Richard texted her asking her if she can get online.... very timely for her breaktime at work, Maria turned on her laptop computer, and get herself on line, and Richard was already waiting. It's there first chat as lovers..
Maria : Hi where are you..
Richard: Taping.. just taking a break too, I know it's lunch break there now, have you eaten your meal?
Maria: not yet, but it's okey. I'll chat with your first... I am not hungry yet.. so why?
Richard: Can't take my mind off you.... looks like knowing you love me too, will make me long to see you often... I miss you right away...
Maria :Smiling, I am missing you too...but we are okey right? we expect this will happen..
Richard: yeah.. but still it's different... this feeling just haunts me... the desire to be with you....
Maria: I know... and that's part of the feeling that we need to endure right? at least we can use that feeling as inspiration so that even if we are very far from one another, we will remain strong... can I count on you on that...I mean in my case, not because I miss you, I will seek somebody else's companionship just to fill up your void... i hope you get what I mean... I mean no one can replace you while you're there... that should be the case right?
Richard: you can't tell it directly (grinning)... are you reminding me not to date anyone?
Maria: well if you can avoid it why not? I mean, don't date anyone just because you are missing my companionship, date someone because you like the person.... well that does not sound good, and I don't like what I feel while I am telling this to you... but Richard, what I do not know won't hurt me.... but in my part, you are assured, I wont be dating anyone.. anymore.... I guess you know me already..
Richard: Grinning (as if elated to what Maria said) you sound jealous... but you look cute dear.
Maria: it's actually a warning hahahaha
Richard: I love it you're becoming possessive...
Maria: I like your smile.... looks like your happy to see me jealous.. don't ever try to do it in purpose... please....
Richard: come on..... can't think of anyone else,, my mind is too preoccupied by you.... and dont worry, my work and family wont give me extra time to date anyone unless she's the one from Philippines... I'll be there December, at least try to be there on Christmas season...
Maria: that would be 6 months from now...
Richard: 6 months are long enough..... sounds forever to me... but if my sched. permit, will try to go there in earlier then will return on december for xmas
Maria: 6 mos wont be long... just be here in December... not that I dont want you here often but be practical please.... and conserve your energy too..
Richard: yes maam, Maria.... you look prettier...
Maria: stop it I am blushing already
Richard: hahaha but seriously, hope your hesitations won't bother you anymore... I am happy to know you are adjusting to the situation
Maria: actually it is still bothering me...but your constant presence in my life, neutralizes my feelings.. we will still talk about it okey? Okey take a rest now, I will attend a seminar at 1pm... can I just see you later, at home?
Richard: ah okey take care dear, I love you, I'll deal with your hesitations let's talk about it soon..
Maria: Saranghaeyo.... hahaha did I say it correctly?
Richard: Good enough hahahah