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Letter to my daughter

Updated on December 3, 2010

Daughter, when these words will truly reach your soul you will probably be my age, and by then you will have realized that this world isn’t perfect, but you can still make it wonderful each day that you step in it, fierce, but still with the primitive fear of a baby who’s just born. You will have learned that there are friends who weren’t really friends, and lovers that didn’t really love you. There will be relationships that will not work, and people that you must leave behind. There will be tears to be cried and laughter that will make you forget about the bitterness of those tears. There will be disappointments that will feel like the world has stopped, and mornings where the sun will shine so bright that you’ll feel like you can hold the entire world in the palm of your hand. There will be jobs that will exhaust your energy to its very core, and nights spent trying to keep your eyes on a Math book that speaks Greek to you. There will be cars breaking down on you when you’re already late for an important meeting. There will be nights so damn long that you’ll feel like tomorrow won’t ever come fast enough. There will be exams, and tests, and assessments to take, over and over and over again. There will be scores to be achieved, and plans to be laid out before you. There will be goals you’ll never reach, and promises that won’t be kept. There will be people who will misunderstand your intentions, and lies that will make you wonder if there are still good people left out there. There will be cars that drive so fast that the world will feel like it’s at your feet, and accidents that’ll happen when you least expect them (and that’s why they call them accidents).

Through it all, don’t you fear the downs, and don’t get too excited about the ups. Through it all and above all, don’t let other people make the decisions that belong to you, and don’t let anybody plan your route for you. Don’t let unloving partners stomp on your heart more than once, and unworthy friends get the best of you. Be your own best friend, and respect yourself above anybody else. Leave incompetent coworkers behind, and focus on your own work only. Everybody gets what they deserve, sooner or later. Find the right job and put your whole self, mind and soul in it, every day, passionately, is if every day were your first day. But don’t forget about family, friends and lovers in the attempt to get to the top because they will be the ones to wipe your tears when disaster strikes. Remember that for every person that lets you down, there will always be another one that will pick you up and dust you off when you can’t do it on your own. For every exam you will fail, there will a promotion that will earn you respect, glory and gratification. For every Math equation you won’t understand, there will be a friend who will care so much for you to take the exam for you (where applicable, of course). And for every Math exam you will fail, you will score an A in another subject which will make you feel like a specialist in the field. For every job you will lose, for every chance you won’t get, there will be a better job and a better chance. Just wait and see. For every lover that will shatter your heart, there will be a man so kind and devoted that all past hurt will be forgotten in the very moment your souls fuse together.

Remember, never look back in anger. Forgiveness and love are the only way forward, the only way to get past the failures. Hate for a moment, maybe for a day. Then grant forgiveness to the people whose carelessness broke your heart. They will be left empty handed. You will be left with peace. Travel, travel the world. Always keep in your heart the very first time you took your very first flight; the anxiety, the excitement, the shiver you felt when the plane took off. Remember that feeling and make it the inspiration to your every day, the emotion to your every experience. Take chances. Take all the chances you can take. Sometimes they will involve separation and distance from the things you love the most; but chances are chances and they won’t be waiting for you. Plan your future, but don’t live in the future. Remember your past, but don’t live for the past. There is a time for everything, but the present is all you can really be able to experience. So be wise and look forward, but don’t forget to feel, taste, and smell the things that surround you now, in this very moment you are breathing in.

Lastly, my baby, among all these uncertainties and doubts I must have faced you with, there is one unbreakable, undeniable and unmistakable truth. And that is that I will be there for you, in every step of the way, to catch you when you fall and celebrate the victories when you succeed. I gave you life, but you don’t belong to me. You didn’t belong to me anymore in the very moment I put you in this world, and with that knowledge came the fear that I can’t protect you from the mistakes you will make, and clear the way when obstacles arise. But I can sure be there to love you.




Your Mother


© 2010 Roberta S


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    • Edward J. Palumbo profile image

      Ed Palumbo 4 years ago from Tualatin, OR

      There are volumes of things we want to tell our children…what to avoid, what matters and what doesn't, how to deal with countless things that only time and experience usually teach us. You'll probably edit this a time or two, but give it to her when she's ready to absorb the wisdom. You've written something your daughter will treasure. Now, what will you tell your son? Interesting Hub. I'd like to read more of it.

    • robertaharden profile image

      Roberta S 7 years ago from California on the rocks

      Thank you much, I really appreciated your kind words

    • the clean life profile image

      Mark Bruno 7 years ago from New Jersey Shore

      What a beautiful thing to write to your daughter. You have given her every bit of great information to succeed in her life ahead. You have touched every part of life that your daughter will need to survive in our world today. Very well written, beautiful and touching to my heart for I too have a daughter.

      Voted UP and Beautiful.

    • robertaharden profile image

      Roberta S 7 years ago from California on the rocks

      Thanks!I felt the same way about it. I wanted my daughter to know and realize that despite the fact that I must play the role of the discipliner every day, I am also on her side, I am her friend, and will be with her throughout the lessons that life will teach her. Thank your for reading!:)

    • The Suburban Poet profile image

      Mark Lecuona 7 years ago from Austin, Texas

      I think it's great that you wrote this. I've done the same for my children. In fact the primary driver for my hubs is that one day, my children will know my mind and it will be something they can refer to (hopefully!) when I'm gone... they will see who I was and how I felt about life... keep doing it...

    • robertaharden profile image

      Roberta S 7 years ago from California on the rocks

      Thank you Laurie. I plan on putting this letter under the tree for her to keep. I don't think she will be able to understand now, at her age, but I'll make sure to save that letter for her to read again in 15 years, when she'll have gone through the experiences that are gonna mold her character.

    • LaurieDawn profile image

      LaurieDawn 7 years ago

      What a beautiful legacy for your daughter. Such profound loving words. Did you also write that for her in a handwritten format? Just curious, I would have loved to have that from my mother. Wonderful hub, and voted up.



    • ilmdamaily profile image

      ilmdamaily 7 years ago from A forgotten corner of a dying empire. OK, it's Australia :-)


      This is lovely! Incredibly touching...your little girl is so very lucky to have you as her mother! So many people offload so much of their own baggage onto their children, and try to dictate the course that their lives will take. Here, you have avoided that completely, and the unconditional love and hope you express for her is moving indeed.

      A prediction: in your old age (which is ever so far off) you will find yourself a matriarch of your family. You will be surrounded by children, and the strength of your personality will be there as a cornerstone in so many of their lives.

      The sharpest swords are forged in the hottest fires...your lessons will be heeded:-)

      Great work, miss!