ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel

Looking For a Place to Die

Updated on August 4, 2014

I was young and brilliant,
but the problem was
I thought I was a woman.
My soul was stolen cause I didn't guard it
and that proved something,
but I was too hard headed
to focus on the lesson.

I was a little girl
and he knew I was too damn sweet.
He knew I was naive
and that's what attracted him to me,
the fucking creep.

I alienated everyone who loved me.
I didn't want to have friends.
I just wanted to be alone
with my demon.
I won't lie,
I am sometimes satisfied
when I feel an evil visitor
enter my body.

There are times
when he won't allow me to cry,
and those are the moments I really
feel like I need help.
But, that only happens once in a while.
I'm good in life, I just need a place to die.

This might sound strange, but something about him
allows my true talent to come out.
I try to act as God's child,
but this spirit
doesn't feel godly at all.
I feel like I'll be misunderstood again,
but I know who I am
and that is why
I am bold in my statements.
I will never fall.

I'm just looking for a place to die.
I need a place to rest when my body
is too tired to settle for a night
of tossing and turning.
That is why I hustle
and that is why I
put up with the bullshit
of this journey.

You don't have a goal?
You don't know what you want?
I'm leaving you behind,
you're no love of mine.

I'm searching for something,
and it has to be better
than the place I was born in.

I have split personalities and we need a place
where we will be accepted.
It's hard to believe
that we don't always agree.

Man, I just remember being young,
brilliant, and naive.
I was forced to do things I didn't want,
but I didn't know I had to become strong.
See, you can't send just any little girl
out to hunt,
she needs experience first.


    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment
    • Ryem profile imageAUTHOR


      7 years ago from Maryland

      Thank you for the great comment, I really appreciate it!

    • Harishprasad profile image

      Harish Mamgain 

      7 years ago from New Delhi , India

      Ryem, your poems are like rays of the Sun and your light is so overwhelming and powerful, though, this poem is imbued with streaks of sadness. But, then rays have to penetrate deep into everything. Voted up. Peace. :-)

    • Ryem profile imageAUTHOR


      7 years ago from Maryland

      Thank you, Skylar!!

    • SkySlave profile image

      Skyler DeCristoforo 

      7 years ago from Olympia, WA

      Very raw and true. I definitely feel the emotion tucked into these words. Brilliant!

    • Ryem profile imageAUTHOR


      7 years ago from Maryland

      Thank you, Angela. : )

    • Angela Ohm profile image

      Angela Ohm 

      7 years ago from Beach Park, Illinois

      This is very deep and powerful ! Great writing ! Voted up.

    • Ryem profile imageAUTHOR


      7 years ago from Maryland

      You're great! Thanks so much!

    • word55 profile image

      Al Wordlaw 

      7 years ago from Chicago

      Nice, cool digging this up Lisa Luv. Way to share!

    • word55 profile image

      Al Wordlaw 

      7 years ago from Chicago

      Way to express yourself Ryem. Nice digging up JackieThere is no place for you to choose to die so just try to keep living. Most of us have had to learn to be strong sooner or later. That's life! Some people are affected with pain much more than others. You survived! I can tell! Stay up my sister! You are truly loved!

    • Ryem profile imageAUTHOR


      7 years ago from Maryland

      Thank you, Lisa!!

      Yes Jodah, isn't it great how music can inspire you that way? Thank you for commenting: )

    • Jodah profile image

      John Hansen 

      7 years ago from Gondwana Land

      Wow Ryem, what a poem you wrote there. I see you were inspired after listening to the song in the video. I have written a couple of poems after being inspired b songs too. This is so dark and brutally honest though, very impressive. Voted up.

    • Lisa Luv profile image

      Lisa J Warner AKA Lisa Luv 

      7 years ago from Conneticut, USA

      Nicely written and a very point-full piece... KUDOS!!! GREAT JOB!!!

    • Ryem profile imageAUTHOR


      8 years ago from Maryland

      Thank you everyone for all of your nice comments!

    • Indian Chef profile image

      Indian Chef 

      8 years ago from New Delhi India

      Very beautifully written poem and though there was pain in it but I still liked it.

    • bizarrett81 profile image

      Elizabeth Barrett Kearney 

      8 years ago from Maine

      Beautifully written, indeed. I love the lines :

      "I have split personalities and we need a place

      where we will be accepted.

      It's hard to believe

      that we don't always agree."

      So powerful and full of pain, as everyone else has said. Voted up and everything but funny

    • Laurinzo Scott profile image

      LJ Scott 

      8 years ago from Phoenix, Az.

      Very well written, and indeed I too could feel the pain flowing from this one...

    • Minnetonka Twin profile image

      Linda Rogers 

      8 years ago from Minnesota

      My heart is so heavy right now. You are a very talented writer and did a great job expressing your emotions in images. Beautifully sad and heart-wrenching poem. Are you going to be alright? Email if you need an ear. I'm a good listener and a counselor.

    • wayne barrett profile image

      Wayne Barrett 

      8 years ago from Clearwater Florida

      Ryem, very powerful work. I could feel the pain and the frustration. Well written. Voting up and sharing.

    • Ryem profile imageAUTHOR


      8 years ago from Maryland

      Thank you, Bill and shofarcall!

    • shofarcall profile image


      8 years ago

      Heartbreaking. Shows the face of the cruelty of this world. God Bless you.

    • billybuc profile image

      Bill Holland 

      8 years ago from Olympia, WA

      Brutally realistic. I was going to hit "beautiful" but it is too is beautifully written but man oh man there is some serious pain here. :) Well done!


    This website uses cookies

    As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

    For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at:

    Show Details
    HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
    LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
    Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
    AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
    Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
    CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the or domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
    Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
    Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
    Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
    Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
    ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)
    ClickscoThis is a data management platform studying reader behavior (Privacy Policy)