ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel
  • »
  • Books, Literature, and Writing»
  • Poems & Poetry

Lost: Song & Poem

Updated on June 9, 2017
PDXKaraokeGuy profile image

Justin W. Price, AKA PDXKaraokeGuy, is a freelance writer, blogger, and award-nominated author based out of Juneau, Alaska.

Source

Through Composition

From Wikipedia.org:

"In music theory about musical form, the term through-composed means that the music is relatively continuous, non-sectional, and/or non-repetitive. A song is said to be through-composed if it has different music for each stanza of the lyrics."


This song is not through composed, but it's a non traditional format. The lay out of the lyrics would allow for through composition.

The Background

I don't typically write songs/poems in a blatantly evangelical vein. Hell, I don't typically write about anything blatantly. This piece is a possible exception.

I wrote it in high school. I was concerned that one of my friends might be contemplating suicide and I wrote this piece imaging what her life was like at that point. What had happened to her that, at such a young age, she felt so hopeless? I wrote this piece, almost exactly as it appears below, and showed it to her. I remember, she cut out the poem from the paper it was written on and put it on her binder.

I am happy to report that she is alive and well and I keep in touch with her periodically.

I had always intended for this piece to be a song, which is odd, because it's not written in a typical verse/chorus/verse/bridge/chorus format. Instead, it is ALMOST through composed. I say almost because it does have a verse repeated, more like a chorus, before the denouement.

I started a band in 1998, after my high school band (Five Minutes Cooler) broke up, called Royalty Wears Thorns. We were experimental, loud, and pretty much reviled. But people liked this song. It was our set closer and would usually climax with me ripping the strings off of my guitar and then smashing it to the ground. Those days were fun. I've been in four bands, and Royalty Wears Thorns has by far been my favorite.

I don't know what key this is in. I didn't pay attention to things like that in those days, but I could probably figure it out. My part, the jangly arpeggiated part, was played on a wafer thin danelectro guitar with the tone on high. For any tabbers out there, the tuning is DADGAD.

Below is first the original version of the poem, followed by the lyrics adapted for song and, below that, a video for the song so that you can hear the music, if you are so inclined.

I find the subtle changes between the poem and the song to be fascinating. For example "Love from Above" in the original is changed to "LIght from Above." God poetry should be rhythmic, but music has to be, so the lyrics within that have to have a rhythm to them as well. I like the lyrical liberties that The Sub Con made with this piece. I think it's stronger as a result.

Thanks for reading and enjoy.


Lost: The Poem


Alone she walks, finding her place among the streets. Alone she walks on poisoned feet. The pain in her heart won't go away. She stands on a bridge and looks down into the water and she cries. A little piece dies. She can't escape the demons that have her. Will she awaken in a pool of her own blood? Will she escape to the One who is Love?

I watch her from afar and say a silent prayer for her. I see her scars as she walks away and-- for a moment--I am stirred. She won't take my hand. She can't remember the One she used to love. The One who shines down Light from Above.

Help her through this! She blasphemes you now with the shake of her fist. She can't grasp just who You are. She can't grasp just who she is. Her mind is a locked gate, like her heart. But I have faith! You have done greater things! She will come crawling to You on scabby knees. The Love from Above.



all rights reserved. Copyright 1997, Justin W. Price

DADGAD Tuning

Source

Lost: The Song

Alone she walks, to find her place among the streets. So alone and walking around on poisoned feet. She won't see another day.

The fear in her heart won’t go away. She stands on a bridge and looks down into the

water and she cries. A little piece has died.

The fear in her heart won’t go away. She stands on a bridge and looks down into the water and she cries. A little piece dies. She can't escape the spirits that have her. Will she awaken in a pool of her own blood? Or will she go to the One who is Love?

I watch her from afar and say a silent prayer for her. She shows me her scars and she walks away and-- for the moment--I am stirred.

I don’t understand why he won't take my hand. Can't she remember the boy that she used to love. The boy that showed her the Light from Above.

God, help her through this! She blasphemes You now with the shake of a fist. She can't grasp just who You are.

Her mind is locked like the gate of her heart. But I have faith! You have done greater things! And Your will shall be done. And she will come crawling on scabby knees.

I watch her from afar and say a silent prayer for her. She shows me her scars and she walks away and-- for the moment--I am stirred.

I don’t understand why he won't take my hand. Can't she remember the boy that she used to love. The boy that showed her the Light from Above.

The Light from Above.


all rights reserved. copyright 2000. Justin W. Price/Paul Hedrick

THE SONG

The Band Life

Have you been in a band or performed as a solo artist?

See results

Comments

    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment

    • PDXKaraokeGuy profile image
      Author

      Justin W Price 5 years ago from Juneau, Alaska

      Thanks so much, Tams. very kind words!

    • Tams R profile image

      Tams R 5 years ago from Missouri

      I love this poem. Deep and rich. I was only disappointed in one part - when it ended.

      Well done!

    • PDXKaraokeGuy profile image
      Author

      Justin W Price 5 years ago from Juneau, Alaska

      Jinny, I'm so happy you were touched by this poem. Thanks for your kind comment!

    • profile image

      JinnyMarte 5 years ago

      One more time I am moved by another one of your writings. How many times have we found ourselves in this place and have felt lost. Many ignore the Light of The Almighty and find it in a time of despair, but how much harder it is for those who have met Him and simply forget the way or are too proud or too hurt to seek Him.

      This is beautiful and deep. Thank you.

    • PDXKaraokeGuy profile image
      Author

      Justin W Price 5 years ago from Juneau, Alaska

      Admiral and Cats, thank you very much for your kind words. I'm always nervous posting more preachy poems, but I'm glad you were able to connect with the underlying emotion. I appreciate your reads and your comments!

    • Admiral_Joraxx profile image

      Admiral_Joraxx 5 years ago from Philippines

      Wow!, I instantly felt like an outcast something as I read it, lost, wounded and alone. Great poetry PDXKaraokeguy! Your words here drives ones feeling into it. 1 vote up, beautiful and awesome.=)

    • Lucky Cats profile image

      Kathy 5 years ago from The beautiful Napa Valley, California

      Hello PDXKarokeGuy..your concern and vigilence over the woman is touching and your desire that she find God is inspiring..and hopeful. She has strayed but, God willing, she will return to her former self while recognizing "The Love from Above." Very interesting, beautiful as well as voted UP and useful.

    • PDXKaraokeGuy profile image
      Author

      Justin W Price 5 years ago from Juneau, Alaska

      Thank you, housewife. I enjoy it. It's my favorite medium of communication, at least artistically.

    • RealHousewife profile image

      Kelly Umphenour 5 years ago from St. Louis, MO

      I think your poetry is very interesting! Voted up!

    • PDXKaraokeGuy profile image
      Author

      Justin W Price 5 years ago from Juneau, Alaska

      Ladyjojo, I couldn't agree more. I makes me sad to see people walking the road of death, no matter the cause. Thanks for stopping by and commenting!

    • ladyjojo profile image

      ladyjojo 5 years ago

      This was very nice and so many of these people i see daily. Heading down to a road of death that they themselves doesn't know the end and the Master calls them and they refuse to answer His calls. So sad may God keep us along the way......

    • PDXKaraokeGuy profile image
      Author

      Justin W Price 5 years ago from Juneau, Alaska

      Thank u for stopping by, Heavenbound

    • heavenbound5511 profile image

      heavenbound5511 5 years ago from Under the shadow of the Almighty God!

      Awesome- all that call on Jesus shall be saved from destruction- No greater love than that of God!

    • PDXKaraokeGuy profile image
      Author

      Justin W Price 6 years ago from Juneau, Alaska

      thanks lavender

    • profile image

      lavender3957 6 years ago

      Nice

    Click to Rate This Article