Love. Time. Eternity: Lt 10

Savvy, I know I have been a bit dramatic in the past. And I think in a lot of ways I failed to pay attention to the reactions around me. But I want to change that, I do love change, sometimes it's that fresh look at something that helps keep the world interesting. Granted, I wouldn't get carried away, I am not a hipster after the next best thing. No, my grass is perfectly green over here in my world. :) Though to have a little change every now and then makes sense. And its time for a little of that. Of course you are not going to miss out on any of it. No, you will have a front seat ride the whole time through these letters. I plan to tell you all about the things that happen. I'm not giving up, and you will see that soon enough.

After a little dose of LDS faith this week my perspective has broadened further. (Yes I kept to my words and went to church) Though it wasn't like I remembered. Still many things to consider, but that can come in time. It was surprising how many people were on their phones texting though. Haha. Anyway, I only brought that up to let you know I was keeping to the Honor I proclaimed. We spoke about the kinds of things you want in the future and I won't give up on that. For now, you are who you are. Enough talk about that though. I wanna dive into this weeks dream, because you have read a handful of them so far and I feel like you haven't even come close to the best ones. I am still astounded by the things I have been shown. Because you aren't even in my arms, I cannot even feel your heart beating next to me. But somehow, my heart sings to your tune and follows your chords. The heart always influences the mind, why do you think there is always so much confusion when in love. I'm not worried though, and you shouldn't be either. I just wanna show you love. You and me can make it anywhere, but for now I just wanna see you smile...

...4am, 'sigh'. All I could think about was how much I missed you. Rubbing my eyes I lean over to the edge the hotel double bed, and roll myself to my feet. It's warmer here, I guess I thought it would be colder. Had to sleep in my underwear. I stood at the crack of the curtain to the large window that over looked a starlit city, “it's amazing anyone can sleep with all these lights.” “Or maybe they don't.” I just leaned my head against the glass staring blankly, half naked and towering over Tokyo. The room was pretty high up in the air, I thought, but just as quickly as the thought arrived, it fled. Being replaced with 'why I was here'. Don't get me wrong I always wanted to visit Tokyo, and hundreds of other places around the world. But I wanted you by my side, I wanted our family together. I missed that, I missed our kids, I missed you Savvy. I knew why I had to be here, work was work and this is where it led me. I use to envy Tony Stark out of all the Iron Man comics and movies. But once you get that sense of feeling on top of everything. It just doesn't feel worth anything, not like the feeling I get when I am home. Nothing can take away our long nights of warm cuddling when you had a rough day. Or the endless playful sarcasm and jokes we parade through in the mornings when we are both a little cranky but romantically in love. Or the satisfying proud feeling I can get when I look out across my yard after a long family BBQ, and see that I found her (my Savvy), the one that brought all the pieces of my life together. My beautiful family all together, your mom & dad took some time, but it was worth it! Such wonderful people. And our kids have never seen happiness like this. It was like a wish upon wishes.

The alarm went off just then, 5am. Work was in just a couple hours. I guess all the city lights captured me into a day dream. I know it was only a week I had been gone this time, but when you know what kind of love you have waiting for you at home. Then it feels like a lifetime. Wandering to the mirror in the rather large bathroom for a hotel. I still was getting use to the idea of luxury, since I was born I lived in poverty. Poor house, poor school, poor life. The only things I grew up learning the most was survival, and surprisingly, kindness as well. I look in the mirror flexing like every morning, a little boost of confidence to make me feel like hitting the gym all this time was worth it. Just then I smile, thinking about what you usually say to me when you catch me doing that. “Stop playing with your muscles.” and then slap me on the butt playfully. Usually we end up in a tickle fight right after. (Too bad we can't do that now).

Hair's done, just gotta brush my teeth and I will be out the door. Still had a little time though. Probably take a light walk before I make it to the meeting. “Be-loop”, just then my phone chimed in. Text message? Probably. I literally get mild goosebumps every time my phone goes off with a text, it's happened ever since the day we started dating. Because in my mind I always get excited to think it's you for some reason. Doesn't matter when or where or even if I know you are busy. I always think to myself please be Savvy, please be Savvy. I guess I kinda make up in my mind that, 'maybe she forgot to tell me something important' or 'maybe she just wants to tell me she misses me or loves me.' It's really incredible how I automatically do that, if that doesn't mean I love you then I don't know what does. Haha. It was you on the text! Even with the time difference you woke up just to text me to have a good morning. I wrote back that I love you too, and I wish you were here. With the boost of confidence from my true love, this was definitely going to be a good morning...

I know this dream may have seemed like it was focused on me because I was the only one in it. But then again I wasn't was I. This was a dream created by you, all of them have been. I once told you that you were my muse. It's not far from the truth, inspiration follows you. It's an aura you can't escape, it's why you have such natural talent. There really is no reason to doubt your capabilities. But I haven't doubted a thing about you since day one. Because if there is anything I truly believe in over all realms of possibilities, it's you!

Savvy with where my heart and mind fight on uneven ground right now. One thing remains in agreement. You. No matter the cost, no matter the pain. The love I hold for you is undefeatable, it is protected on a level that I don't even understand. And I have spent my life trying to understand everything. So if you ever read these letters, and you feel that spark of love in return. Just remember mine won't ever fade, and with our two sparks we can ignite the world.

Forever, an eternity beyond time

I love you.

- Sky