ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel

Loving the UnLoveable

Updated on August 19, 2020
lifelovemystery profile image

Entrepreneur, writer, mom, and experienced digital marketing professional who enjoys writing about business, employment, and social issues.

Sometimes You Need to Love Someone From a Distance

When you and your spouse aren’t getting along. When your teen rebels. When your parents use tough love and must enforce the rules. When your friend makes bad choices, and all you can do is bite your tongue. Sometimes you need a little time, a little space, a little prayer, and a deep breath. It is alright to love someone at arm’s length for a time.

I love this scripture reference as a reminder that we are not to be afraid of the unknown.

Isaiah 41:10 So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.

Time and Space


Distance Can Be Beneficial to Everyone

Sometimes you need distance with people. Just remember God is close. He sees your struggle. He understands the defiant. He will uphold you during this time and he will give you the strength to endure.

Responding to Anger

How do you respond to someone that just wants to argue?

See results

God Understands


Patience is Required When You Can't Escape

I took care of my Dad for the last 18 months of his life. He will always be the most incredible, insightful, kind and genuine man I have ever known.

My Dad had Alzheimer's.

The disease roped off the most brilliant part of his mind and left him with memories of war and fear. Those memories created anxiety within him that took endless conversations each day and assurances that everything and everyone was safe.

He woke up every day with the sight, scent, and memories of his time in Korea. I won't write his description of the place, but he did have a soft spot for the people. My Dad's memories of the people he met was their absolute poverty. He would cry and feel extreme sadness that the Koreans he met during his deployment had nothing.

Responding to Repetitive Stories

My Dad's stories were told verbatim multiple times throughout the day. There were never new details or surprises, but each time I responded as if I didn't know the story.

The patience it takes to endure the repetition cannot be measure. As a caregiver, you cannot escape the stories.

Endurance, perseverance, love, and genuine kindness is the only way to survive 18 months with an Alzheimer's patient. I found following a daily routine was the easiest way to stay sane from 6 AM to 10 PM. Any change to his routine whether it was a trip to a doctor, dentist, or breakfast at his favorite mountain restaurant could flip a switch that took him to the dark side of the disease.

My Dad passed away in June 2020 and it took a year to unwind from the routine I had developed with him. The patience that I learned during that experience is now being used with another family member that appears to have the onset of Dementia.

Caregivers can't escape any more than the Patient can walk away from the disease. It is a time that only one of you will survive, and the other will leave to be with Jesus.

This content is accurate and true to the best of the author’s knowledge and is not meant to substitute for formal and individualized advice from a qualified professional.

© 2012 Michelle Orelup


This website uses cookies

As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at:

Show Details
HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the or domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)
ClickscoThis is a data management platform studying reader behavior (Privacy Policy)