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Me... An Old Lady

Updated on March 15, 2011

Old lady

I was called an "Old Lady," the other day, and I was never so happy to be called anything in all of my life. Now, mind you, I'm only 62 years old. Prior to the incidence that I'm about to share, I might have been offended. After all, THEY say that 60 is the new 40, LOL! So by THEIR standards I'm only 42. Yeah, whatever, anyway the experience made me happy to be called an old lady. By the way who are THEY anyway, (Just asking)?

My Experience

I've been taking public transportation lately and, have had some very interesting experiences, this is just one of them.

I had just gotten off the bus and was walking home, when I was approached by this very young man, I say very young to emphasize why he saw me as an old lady, okay, now work with me here on this one. Anyway, I had some magazines in my hand, and he asked me, "how much you got?" So I held up the magazines, and said, "these many." He then said, "how much do want?" Thinking he wanted to buy my magazines, which weren't for sale, I said, clueless, "I'm not charging for these. "He said, "you don't want nothing?" Then I said, "wait, are you trying to sell me drugs?" He boldly said, "yes!" And I said, "why?" He pointed to another young man a little ways away from us, and said that he was told to look out for a lady coming down the street. The young man let out a chorus of expletives to his companion, I won't repeat here. He proceeded to take me over to the young man, and I asked his mother's name, assuming he was from the neighborhood, (he wasn't). At any rate, as both took a closer look at me, the first one said to his companion, "man this is an old lady, why you let me mess with an old lady like this." (Take a look at my picture on this hub, that photo was taken in 2009, so you know I haven't aged since then). Then he told me to put a curse on his friend, (as if I could). I carried my old lady handle a little further, and said I would, LOL, and told them that they should be ashamed of themselves as I walked away. I walked away feeling like an old lady, and enjoying every moment of it. Their perception of me probably saved me from needless explanation, or maybe something even worse.

Needless to say I was in the middle of a drug deal gone bad. Being an old lady protected me, from whatever could have happened, had I not been perceived, or in some sectors an actual old lady.

Conclusion

So all you old ladies, let it all hang out, it could work to your advantage if you're ever in a drug deal that you don't want to be in. LOL!

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    • profile image

      getmyback 6 years ago

      LOved this immensely,

      Old Lady is like a protection shield

      seriously however, I am so glad your okay

      Thanks for this hub

      It's 19 minutes old

      but you are not

      lol

      billY

    • franciaonline profile image

      franciaonline 6 years ago from Philippines

      Hi fastfreta,

      You will always get away with messy situations given your personality. ( Reading all your hubs gets me closer to the woman that you are!Strong, vibrant, funny, very intelligent, compassionate!) Yup, the "Old Lady" badge is a badge of honor, this time in your story - a badge of security. The badge when viewed by ageist though puts the elderly in a vulnerable position. But there is a way out to the vulnerability of course and that is by being a stable, wise and gracious Old Lady. Thanks for sharing your experience here.

    • fastfreta profile image
      Author

      Alfreta Sailor 6 years ago from Southern California

      Thanks you two for weighing in so quickly. And yes Billy, I am alright. franciaonline you're right it was a real protection. Thanks you two for stopping and reading and for the comments.

    • Veronica Allen profile image

      Veronica Allen 6 years ago from Georgia

      What a saving grace! I guess we never know what may be a protection for us. No doubt you will be wearing this badge of honor proudly - especially seeing that it no doubt saved your very life.

    • fastfreta profile image
      Author

      Alfreta Sailor 6 years ago from Southern California

      You're so right Veronica, my old lady status really was a protection that one time. Thanks for stopping. See you soon.

    • Ann Nonymous profile image

      Ann Nonymous 6 years ago from Virginia

      Oh my goodness, freta...for some reason the lady who swallowed a fly has been on my mind lately!

      Great story telling and great story! Good job!

    • fastfreta profile image
      Author

      Alfreta Sailor 6 years ago from Southern California

      Thanks Ann for your very generous comment. Please come back again soon.

    • Hello, hello, profile image

      Hello, hello, 6 years ago from London, UK

      Gosh, you were lucky. As regard the 'Old Lady' bit, in that age everybody it old. There is a saying that yur are as old as you feel and I am sure you don't feel old. Stupid kid.

    • alekhouse profile image

      Nancy Hinchliff 6 years ago from Louisville, Kentucky

      Freta, don't feel bad, I get called "Old Lady" all the time. Well, I guess though, in this case it was a blessing. This is absolutely hilarious...typical "Fastfreta" You have such a great sense of humor, especially for an Old lady LOL. You made my day! Happy Easter. Loved the videos. Still ROFLMAO.

      Thanks.

    • RevLady profile image

      RevLady 6 years ago from Lantana, Florida

      With grandparents being in their thirties and great grandparents in their late forties and early fifties these days, it is understandable that us Baby boomers may get called old.

      God bless you on this wonderful Resurrection Sunday!!

      Forever His,

    • BkCreative profile image

      BkCreative 6 years ago from Brooklyn, New York City

      Come visit me in Brooklyn, NY fastfreta, where old ladies like me have a different set of interesting issues.

      It seems men want us - why? With the economy and men being broke, it seems the older woman appears to be settled and can take care of them - maybe they think I get a social security check. But I wish I was exaggerating. I cannot tell you how many times a younger man has sidled up to me telling me age is but a number. The old men are no better. A man of about 60 on the bus asked for my phone number (I'm 60) when I told him no he asked why. I told him that he'd be too much work. He never said another word.

      And here is the advantage of being an old woman - we know how to handle this - as you did, and even leave with parting words - as you did. We can even get scary (as in crazy old lady) if someone messes with us.

      Life is good for this old lady.

      Loved your hub!

    • Enlydia Listener profile image

      Enlydia Listener 6 years ago from trailer in the country

      Sweet!

    • fastfreta profile image
      Author

      Alfreta Sailor 6 years ago from Southern California

      I love all the comments. Oh BK, I've had those too, I like your response, I'll have to use that sometimes.

      Thanks RevLady, I never thought of it that way, you're right.

      The funny thing is alekhouse, I've never been called "old lady" to my face before, and fortunately for my first time I really liked it.

      You're right Hello, hello, I don't feel old so maybe that's why I wasn't offended.

      Thank you Enlydia Listener.

      Thank you all for taking the time to read and leave a comment. Please come again soon.

    • theherbivorehippi profile image

      theherbivorehippi 6 years ago from Holly, MI

      Oh my!! LOVE this story!! See...being that you are 42 (wink wink) saved you! Had you been a couple years younger you may have been in some real trouble! Wow. That will teach you to walk around with magazines again! Don't you know the "signs"...lol. Magazines are ideal to work as distracting shields! I mean..I worked in a bar for half my life so..napkins seems to work well too from what I've seen. haha

    • fastfreta profile image
      Author

      Alfreta Sailor 6 years ago from Southern California

      Okay, I missed that lesson, thank theherbivorehippi, now I know what to do next time. LOL! Thanks for stopping, see you soon.

    • rmcrayne profile image

      rmcrayne 6 years ago from San Antonio Texas

      The boldness of dealers amazes me. They advertize on Craig's list! Those videos are a hoot!

    • fastfreta profile image
      Author

      Alfreta Sailor 6 years ago from Southern California

      What, Craigslist? WOW! That's beyond bold, it borders on stupidity. Thanks rmcrayne for visiting. See you again soon I hope.

    • DynamicS profile image

      Sandria Green-Stewart 6 years ago from Toronto, Canada

      fastfreta, very interesting experience. If the Old Lady title works for you and you are comfortable wit it, then work it!

      I guess I'm on my way in that direction because it uesd to erk me when I'm called maam; now I take it as a badge of honour. Maam is music to my ear! LoL! Maybe in another 20 years, I'll feel ok with the old lady title...

      Thanks for making the sides of my lips curl up:)

    • fastfreta profile image
      Author

      Alfreta Sailor 6 years ago from Southern California

      DynamicS, now that I'm officially an "old lady" I guess I'll have to "work it." LOL! Seriously though it doesn't bother me yet, but who knows in the future. Kind of reminds me of the time I first felt my back fat, I thought it was cute, and I would feel it all the time. Now however I try not to feel it. So maybe later I'll not feel so good about my old lady title either. Thanks for taking time to read and comment. Please come again.

    • profile image

      ladydijay 6 years ago

      -LOL!!! Very funny story, the dances were great.

    • fastfreta profile image
      Author

      Alfreta Sailor 6 years ago from Southern California

      Thanks ladydijay, I like the dances too. Thanks for stopping. See you soon.

    • Sage Williams profile image

      Sage Williams 6 years ago

      Wow, was luck on your side. You had me laughing throughout. When all is said and done, you have a great sense of humor and a wonderful outlook on life.

      Great Job,

      Sage

    • fastfreta profile image
      Author

      Alfreta Sailor 6 years ago from Southern California

      Thanks Sage, you can say that I dodged a proverbial bullet, or maybe even a real one. LOL! Thanks for stopping.

    • Inspiration101 profile image

      Inspiration101 6 years ago

      LOL!! I'm really glad this story turned out the way it did. You had me laughing. Those videos were hilarious too!

    • Feline Prophet profile image

      Feline Prophet 6 years ago from India

      Haha, that was a close shave! :)

    • fastfreta profile image
      Author

      Alfreta Sailor 6 years ago from Southern California

      Inspiration101, ditto about the outcome, and the videos too.

      You're right Feline Prophet it was a close shave.

      Thank you both for stopping and taking the time to comment. Please come back again.

    • Michael Shane profile image

      Michael Shane 6 years ago from Gadsden, Alabama

      Enjoyed the hub!

    • gramarye profile image

      gramarye 6 years ago from Adelaide - Australia

      Enjoyed the hub, but I was also called an old teacher the other day, and didn't appreciate it very much! Now, maybe if there was a drug deal ...

    • fastfreta profile image
      Author

      Alfreta Sailor 6 years ago from Southern California

      Thanks Michael Shane. Sorry 'bout that gramarye, maybe the reason I didn't mind it, because it got me out of a jam. Thanks you two for stopping.

    • Pamela99 profile image

      Pamela Oglesby 6 years ago from United States

      This hub is hysterical. Glad you handled the young men so well. I laughed till I had tears streaming down my face. No old lady can shake it like that! You are young is spirit and heart! Fantastic hub.

    • pmccray profile image

      pmccray 6 years ago from Utah

      Your only as old as you feel. You are not old at 62 and you don't look 62 and your handling of the situation shows that you're a class act. Your experience is typical of the lack of upbringing in our society. No value system, lack of respect for others and no manners. This young person is not at fault, his authority figures have allowed him to grow into a cretin with the manners of a cave dweller. Loved this hub, you don't get old being a fool.

    • loveofnight profile image

      loveofnight 6 years ago from Baltimore, Maryland

      After all, THEY say that 60 is the new 40, LOL! So by THEIR standards I'm only 42......i like that......thx 4 share

    • fastfreta profile image
      Author

      Alfreta Sailor 6 years ago from Southern California

      Thanks Pamela, in hindsight it is really funny.

      You're right Pmccray, I don't at all feel like the 62 of old. I agree with you on your assessment of our society.

      Thank you loveofnight.

      Thank you all for stopping and taking the time to read and leave a comment.

    • ladylux profile image

      ladylux 6 years ago

      Just goes to show that there are blessings at every age. Definitely a story worth documenting. You rule!

    • fastfreta profile image
      Author

      Alfreta Sailor 6 years ago from Southern California

      ladylux, I guess you're right, my age did serve as a blessing for me at that time. Thanks for stopping and commenting. Please stop a gain.

    • keiranthapa profile image

      keiranthapa 6 years ago from Darjeeling

      hi Fastfreta.

      it sure was an amusing incident and you've captured that brilliantly in words. looking forward to seeing more.

    • fastfreta profile image
      Author

      Alfreta Sailor 6 years ago from Southern California

      Thanks keiranthapa for visiting and commenting. See you soon.

    • lctodd1947 profile image

      lctodd1947 6 years ago from USA

      Fastfreta, You said it well....I am where you are and I am old either...I know I am getting older but I am not sick, I am feeble and I can write on Hubpages...I have an 89 year old Mother that is still living and visited me the weekend and she is old.....to say the least but she is a praying Mother...I am so glad I have her still.

      Thank you Fastreta for this story and I am glad they saw you as being old this time... We will forgive them, won't we?????

    • fastfreta profile image
      Author

      Alfreta Sailor 6 years ago from Southern California

      Yes lctodd, I am glad they saw me as old, I do forgive them, and thank them too. LOL! I have my mother also, who is 84 and like you I am glad that I still have her. Thanks for stopping, hope to see you soon.

    • habee profile image

      Holle Abee 6 years ago from Georgia

      What a wonderful story! Wow! You were lucky, FF!

    • fastfreta profile image
      Author

      Alfreta Sailor 6 years ago from Southern California

      Thanks habee, I did escape that one. Thanks for stopping. See you soon.

    • Sue1226 profile image

      Sue1226 6 years ago from Dallas, Texas

      you can feel young when you want and old when needed yeah

    • fastfreta profile image
      Author

      Alfreta Sailor 6 years ago from Southern California

      You're right Sue, and I do when it suits me. Thanks for visiting, hope to see you again.

    • My Digest profile image

      My Digest 6 years ago

      Gosh if I were in your shoes, I would have been glad to be an old lady too. Your acceptance of yourself is a delight. Thanks for sharing this experience.

      *Misty

    • fastfreta profile image
      Author

      Alfreta Sailor 6 years ago from Southern California

      Thanks Misty for the visit. Thanks also for taking the time to leave a comment. Please stop by again.

    • valeriebelew profile image

      valeriebelew 6 years ago from Metro Atlanta, GA, USA

      That second video was a hoot, but if she's an undercover ho, it's definitely undercover, and hidden well. LOL. This whole hub was hilariously funny. I knew I liked you, and now I know another reason why. Your sense of humor is great.

    • fastfreta profile image
      Author

      Alfreta Sailor 6 years ago from Southern California

      I had to go back and look at the video to see what you meant, the words are funny, along with the dancing. Thanks for the compliment, and for taking time to read this hub. See you soon.

    • lovelypaper profile image

      Renee S 6 years ago from Virginia

      Those videos were hilarious. You're never too old to get your groove on.

    • fastfreta profile image
      Author

      Alfreta Sailor 6 years ago from Southern California

      Thanks lovelypaper, I like them too, especially the last one. Yeah, she proved your point very well.

    • rose56 profile image

      rose56 6 years ago

      That video was so funny oh my goodness.

    • fastfreta profile image
      Author

      Alfreta Sailor 6 years ago from Southern California

      Thanks rose56 I liked them too. Thanks for stopping, please come again.

    • Micky Dee profile image

      Micky Dee 6 years ago

      Yo Freta! You're a good-looking 62- don't think I haven't noticed!

    • fastfreta profile image
      Author

      Alfreta Sailor 6 years ago from Southern California

      Why, thank you Micky Dee! Thank you for stopping as usual, see you soon.

    • CarolRucker profile image

      Carol Rucker 6 years ago from Cincinnati

      If you're old, I'm right there a few steps behind you. I love your article.

    • fastfreta profile image
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      Alfreta Sailor 6 years ago from Southern California

      Thanks Carol for stopping, please come back.

    • nadp profile image

      nadp 6 years ago from WEST PALM BEACH, FLORIDA

      Sounds like a harrowing experience! Glad you got out of it.

    • fastfreta profile image
      Author

      Alfreta Sailor 6 years ago from Southern California

      I guess it was in hindsight. Although at the time I didn't think of it that way. I guess I need to be more cautious and not try to see the humor in everything. Thanks nadp for taking time to read and leave a comment.

    • create a page profile image

      create a page 6 years ago from Maryland, USA

      I enjoyed reading your hub fastfreta. As usual, you were bold even in meeting and interacting with strangers. The ladies dancing to Beyonce's single lady song had me cracking up and the lady in the solo dance was enjoying herself. I just had a birthday on Monday, so it made me feel great about being one year older. Thank you!

    • fastfreta profile image
      Author

      Alfreta Sailor 6 years ago from Southern California

      Well, well create a page, very good to hear from you again. I'm glad you enjoyed this hub, hope to see you again soon. Thanks for reading and taking time to read and leave a comment.

    • Joy56 profile image

      Joy56 5 years ago

      hi great hub... I will take one of your magazines please........

    • fastfreta profile image
      Author

      Alfreta Sailor 5 years ago from Southern California

      Gladly Brenda, but they're not for sale.

    • A M Lehrer profile image

      A M Lehrer 5 years ago from Southern United States

      You should be proud of yourself!!! :)

    • fastfreta profile image
      Author

      Alfreta Sailor 5 years ago from Southern California

      Thanks A M Lehrer, I am glad to be called an "old lady." Again thanks for stopping, hope to hear from you again soon.

    • SallyTX profile image

      Sally Branche 5 years ago from Only In Texas!

      Too cute! I like the part where you asked him what his mother's name was! LOL! Voted up and funny!;D

    • fastfreta profile image
      Author

      Alfreta Sailor 5 years ago from Southern California

      Thanks SallyTX, I guess I thought I was back in the day when the neighborhood raised a child. I don't know what I was thinking. Anyway thanks for stopping by, see you soon.

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