Me As Leonardo Da Vinci !!
Me As Leonardo Da Vinci ! !
I am Leonardo Da Vinci.
If you do not a believe that I am the real guy
please do not a pinch me ...
but you can call me Leo for short,
just don't a call me early in the morning,
cause I like to sleep in and dream
of my home port, in Tuscany Italy.
I am an artiste visiting you.
I came here in my time machin,
an invention those who study me have never seen!!
I parked a my time machine
in the principals parking spot,
so if she comes looking for me,
you tell her a “Thanks a lot.”
Tell her not to be mad, but glad,
because when I leave
I will go back in time 2 hours ago and move it,
then she will never know I was there.
it will be just fine.
I was a born in 1452
phewwwweee, that's a long time ago...
I am a 559 years old you know.
How old are you young fellow, Wow!!
You are like a tiny speck of paint
on the huge canvas of life,
a smudge of bright yellow,
while I am an ancient hardened
bit of oil paint in the color of gray,
But hey, I am a still here with you today.
I lived with my grandparents,
lots of cookies, ice cream,
and a bigga pizza slices,
they were real nice,
when I was a child like you.
I used to scribble on all their walls
and I painted their home twice,
because I was a wee artiste
with nothing to do.
I became a Renaissance painter,
Renaissance means re-birth,
like being born all over.
Which is probably why I am here
with you all today.
But I guess I musta been born
old this time I must say.
I was an apprentice for 13 years
under a man named Verrochio.
He was as popular as that boxer
your parents call called Rocky II today.
But he was a famous artiste you know.
And he taught me how to paint
and even earn some pay, Yay!
I also studied biology, botany
but my true love was art
Oh how a my grandparents were always
a cheering me for a being so smart.
But I was also an inventor
and one of my favorite
inventions was a flying bird,
An “ornithopter“ which was quite absurd.
Here I brought one...let me show you.
Everyone move way back that a way,
because a this a flying bird has no brain,
it is untrained and just might create quite a flap.
So when it lands please bring it a back to me
gently for it's nap.
(walk away from the group to launch bird.)
Some of my inventions also include:
A glider, helicopter, parachute, a car run by a spring,
a machine gun, a robot, a tank...tank you very much
, and a scaling ladder.
I also was known for painting the Mona Lisa,
It was just about ta this a big, like this a matte,
30 and 1/4 inches by 20 and 1/4 inches.
The Mona Lisa now hangs at the Louvre in Paris,
but it used to hang on that louver thing-a-ma-gig
on my blinds in my studio.
I am a so very much embarrassed...
I never a knew she would be
such a valuable thing,
and I used her to block
the sunlight in the spring.
It took me a ten years to finish the Mona Lisa.
She a never wanted to sit still.
Like a bucket in a well... up and down.
The painting is called the Mona Lisa because
she was always such a moaner:
“Leo, I'm tired of sitting here for hours,
Leo, I want to go to lunch,
Leo I need a cappucino break.”
Ah, but she was worth the wait,
because her eyes in the painting
they a follow you wherever
you a go in the room.
It's a magical thing and her mysterious smile,
well that was because she was always
five minutes away from her
next break to eat Italian pastries.
Heh, heh, heh. I used a painting
technique called sfumato.
on the Mona Lisa, which means like smoke....
(the technique of allowing tones and colors to shade
gradually into one another, producing softened outlines
or hazy forms.)
I put layers and layers of an oil based glaze on her
that made the highlights and depth
and transparency leap right out at you.
The King of a France himself bought
and owned the Mona Lisa,
I was a soooooo proud.
It was and is a most famous painting,
and she was such a nice a lady
to sit for me so long.
See that little spot right there,
(show a copy of the painting)
That's a Rigatoni sauce
that I dripped on her painting
once during my lunch.
I left it there because it
blended in so well.
Do you know what happens
to you if you turn
the Mona Lisa painting sideways
or upside down and look at it.
You getta really stiff neck."
I should tell you about another artist
I met on my journeys in my time machine,
I stop and visit often in the 1800's
with my good friend
Oscar Claude Monet.
He is such a fine a painter,
he always liked to paint outside,
but he said it was hard
because he always had things
falling into his paintings,
like leaves and bird feathers,
and in the desert when he painted
he had sand and tiny pebbles
blown onto his canvas.
For all I know some of them are
still glued under his paintings and glazes.
Little bits of geography
from where he worked.
Monet loves to paint water,
he likes how the colors
reflect themselves on the surface.
He is one of the painters
who invented Impressionism.
Impressionism is where an
artiste uses dabs of color
to show how a scene looks
and how the light falls.
He once fixed up a boat
as a floating studio because
he loved water painting so much.
I'll just bet you he even
painted in the tub, heh,heh,heh
In school he used to make
funny cartoons of his teachers,
he got in trouble for that
but he became very good
at making caricatures.
Monet made a lot of bigga paintings,
like this one called the Water Lilies.
Isn't it sooooo beautiful...See how big it is,
Here two of you unfold this roll of paper,
it is the actuaL size. Wow it is a bigga then me.
He told me once that he really
only became a painter
because he loves flowers.
When he was older, he went blind,
but he still painted
even though he could not see his work.
Thatza Mazing to me.
Claude Mone was and still is
one of the most famous painters in the world,
and he did some of them with his eyes closed.....
Well I must a be going... my time machine will
run out of batteries and I will be stuck here
painting pictures of Justin Beiber and Barney
I have to fly in my time machine
to the year 3014
to the planet Galuba and
visit some kids in space.
MFB III Productions-
ArtWhimsically Yours Studio-(c)-2011