Fish For Dinner ~ a Micro-Poem
Do You Like to Fish?
Are there any avid fishermen and women out there reading this? Just love to fish, whether you catch anything or not, getting up at 5 am, digging worms for bait, and making sure all the fishing gear (lines, reels, hooks etc.) are all ship-shape and ready to go. Then arriving at the spot and throwing the line in, and waiting.. and waiting. Hours pass and you catch nothing, apart from snags and a few tiny nibbles that take your bait. But you love it anyway, the fresh air, getting away from it all (or the wife), or an excuse to drink beer either accompanied or alone.
Or maybe you are like me, thinking fishing is a wasted pastime unless you are actually catching fish! This poem more or less expresses how I feel at the end of the day if I go fishing.
Fish For Dinner
Lazing on the river bank
Sipping beer beneath a tree.
Fishing rod wedged in a rock,
I'm relaxed and worry free.
Suddenly the line goes taut,
A fish takes up the fight.
I jump up quick to grab the rod (and spill my beer)
Damn, ...*#%#* ..beans again tonight!
Fishy Jokes (sorry)
Q. Why didn’t the prawn share his toys?
A. He was a little shellfish
Q. What fish is a serial killer?
A. Jack the Kipper
Q. What did the fish say when it swam into the wall?
A. Dam!
Q. What are the fastest fish in the river?
A. The motorpike and side-carp
There was a big fight at the seafood restaurant.
Three fish got battered
Q. What kind of money do fishermen make?
A. Net profits
Q. Why do fish like worms?
A. Because they’re hooked on them
Q. What’s the King of Russia’s favourite fish?
A. Tsardines
Q. What fish can write books?
A. Salmon Rushdie
Q. What’s the difference between a catfish and a lawyer?
A. One is a bottom-dwelling, scum-sucking scavenger and the other is a fish!
Q. What swims in the sea, carries a machine gun, and makes you an offer you can’t refuse?
A. The Codfather
Q. Where did Noah keep his fish?
A. A multi-storey carp ark
After catching a speeder…
Policeman: “I’m sorry sir but do you know how fast you were going?!”
Speeder: “I was going the same speed as everyone else!”
Policeman: “Ever go fishing?”
Man: “Yeah…”
Policeman: “Ever catch ALL the fish?”
© 2013 John Hansen
