Monkey Business

Monkey Business.

I never did put 

much stock in evolution.

if I did I would have had 

a house full of monkeys, 

freed by my own hand 

from the local Zoo, 

just in case any of them 

were long lost distant relatives,

I took a bloody nose 

in the seventh grade 

from my science teacher, 

he told us we were all 

evolved from apes.

I raised my hand and said,

maybe your ancestors were 

evolved from monkeys,

but mine weren't.

He took offence 

and in a very ape-like way,

backhanded my nose.

then it was off to the boys room,

with me in tow 

his voice full of apology,

as we paper toweled 

my martyrdom to creationism.

I monkeyed around a lot

when I was a kid,

climbed scores of trees, 

and probably ate at least

72 pounds of bananas,

but my only contact with primates

was Magilla Gorilla

every saturday morning

on cartoons.

Besides if Adam And 

Eve were monkeys

they would have had a heck 

of a lot more kids then two.

I personally think the monkeys and apes

would find it a bit insulting to be 

lumped together with man,

what with our propensity to be so

violent and untribelike,

Although I always did see

a true resembalence

to a furrowed orangutang's brow, 

whenever Donald trump

got up to speak.

So who knows?

maybe some segment of our society,

actually was descended from apes,

I say stop desecrating the graves

of two million year old prehistorians,

let them rest in pieces,

poor Lucy's been handled more then

Bill Clinton's little black book.

We need to start examining what's inside

our own skulls and 

become more like the monkeys,

tribelike and caring for each other

right down to picking the fleas

of of our homeless with some good

medical help and a place to stay 

that's not a box or a cage.