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Paper Castles

Updated on February 21, 2013

Look at the castle I’ve built,

on the ground that I created.

You watched me struggle

to get to this point.

Now ,you’re reluctant to give me praises.

Are you hating?

Why are you jaded, now that I’ve made it?

It rained, I got wet

and mud stained my clothes.

I didn’t ask for help.

More satisfaction came from

doing it myself.

I’ve saved the town

and you’re looking at me all crazy,

like I need to be found.

I’ve seen more of my own blood,

than support throughout this process .

I can’t believe that you’re bold enough

to talk to me like I’m stupid.

I don’t need a medal, just say

“I’m proud of you”.

Let me know you’ve acknowledged

that I’m not a little girl.

I didn’t do this to please you,

but I did want to prove something to you.

Should I feel bad now?

Why don’t you feel good?

I’ve exceeded what the world

thought I’d become.

I’ve gone from a shack

to royalty,

bitter to sweet and I still

have the same heart in me.

I’m still down.

I’m still a lover.

I know where I came from.

I remember the summer

that I was born into.

When the hot, humid air was so thick

I choked ‘til I was rescued.

I was thrown into a pool,

but I remember the flames.

I still wake up

swearing I’ve heard hell

whisper my name.

Even in my castle,

even as a queen,

I still have nightmares.

But, I’m still climbing

because I’m still trying to reach a dream.

Make it a sweet one.

You have shown me

what behaviors not to repeat.

Live for yourself, girl

cause that’s where the satisfaction will be

when you start breaking barriers.

As long as your heart is at peace,

don’t worry what these fools think of you

just believe in me.

I believe in me.

I know what I am…

I know what I will…

I know what I must do…

Someone’s gonna get killed.

My struggle is real.

Envy is your pill.

You’re drugged up,

you’re a screw up.

Don’t credit my success to luck

all because you messed up.

I shake my head.

I can’t believe I’ve lived like this

for as long as I did.

I’m not looking for attention,

all I want is respect.

You don’t have to like me,

I’m not the girl to ask for that.

I just want…

I just want your heart in my castle.

I want to know it won’t go up in flames

because you think I’ve wronged you.

I want us to eat together,

just as we planned.

I never switched up,

I played the same position.

Where are you now,

in the one room shack?

Would you love me again

if I neglected my hard work

and came back to you?

I wanted you in the castle,

but if your heart’s in the shack

I will live and die there too.

I never ever thought you understood me.

I knew in my heart,

That’s not how it should be.

I could’ve given all my love,

but you came between us.

I’m disappointed knowing you’re

heart’s not smart.

Broken hearts are never intelligent.

You broke mine and left the burning walls

as evidence.

I’m dumb enough to walk back into it

cause I just want is to feel whole again.

You make me who I am.


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