Red as I

"I am I" is strict a fantasy poem. It's reading from both the man and the woman point of view. It's about a secret romance with a married man. No I have never did that myself but i wanted to do a poem from another point of view.

You are you and I am I

I gazed across the room admire perspiring while day dreaming

Of lick ice cream from your belly button

Now wouldn't that be something

Listening to your strong deep breaths as you become anxious yep it's the same us we have always been

You are you and I am I my friend

I mean I sit back legs cross

Eyes lost in just how far does that melanin go

My guess is from head to toe

But you know I wouldn't mind a peak

Or a little smackaroo

As pooh would do

Going up the tall tree that is you

I am I and you are you

I see her walking through the room not knowing my hands have smacked it all in my dreams

Lefted hand marks on tattoos and even a tiny bruise

From the candle whose wax was to hot

But she yelled "don't stop!"

As it dripped as I sucked the honey from her lips

I am I and you are you

As I lean back with my drink in my hand trying to constrict my little man

I see the club lights exposing your excitement as if they were point at me and only me to see

Slow tasting them with the warm from my mouth and the chill from the ice.

Them I place my ring on my finger and exit home to release my loyalty upon my forever at home

If only if only I was just I and you were just you.

You ask me if I have the capacity to do it

I wouldn't do it if it was the only choice with a gun to my head saying choose it.

If there was a million men beating me in my head with crowbars

I'll still wouldn't turn on you

Put my hand on the Bible

Go to hell with my rivals

Look the judge in his face and say never did it I was there

I don't care if I was sitting belted up in an electric chair

I would perm my curly locks if you asked me too

I would walk the desert sand without any shoes

Theirs just one thing I ask of you dont hurt me when you see what I would do for.

I would write a bad check at a bank let it bounce let my credit drop that's how serious I feel when you bring the subject up about us

And the fact that you could think differently

And you could leave without a trace

Let me go

Like you would try to replace me

Like some girl could even face me

The very fact that you would put my name in the same race with any female forget the retail

Like her soul could match mine

Like you would have the same vibe

Like you would feel the rhythmic air vibrate with your finger in her hair

But you would let me

You would let me....

Feel as inadequate as just some other female?

I guess when I fell I fell alone

I keep knocking and banging at your head but no ones home

I guess I'm bae

We together...but im alone.

"Like a moon" is about taking the strong independent woman and making her stand by her man not in front of him. I battled with this in many of my relationships. I was raised to take charge as a woman and if the man follows then "GREAT". I was never taught to need a man so when I ran into a man that I needed. Ladies I don't mean financial or physical. I need him in a spiritual way. He just makes my soul happy. So I had to teach myself how to not over shadowed him and be a partner with him.

Sit still like the moon

He said

And watch them gaze and be amazed

They'll admire you like the perfect book in that corner place in the library

They'll admire talk about your quiet storm lightly shooting sparks of lightning

My dear sit still like the moon

And you glow is loud enough

I'll dim the night sky so that your light can glow loud not your mouth

My love be like the moon

Teach the ocean its way to move

Lead the oceans

He said

I'll be admired just as much as a star

She yelled

I'll lead men and woman to home and dreams

Keep your dark night sky I'll be bright without it

I'll be in sight without it

And people will wait for me

I want to be wild like a star

They'll talk about the shooting and burn and disappearing and reappearing

I want to be wild like a star honey bun

They'll sit watching me like a lion from a far

They'll gaze at me like sun rays sweetheart

I'm better as a star.

"It occurred to me" took about a month to write. It's about a parting that you had a rough time doing. Parting from anyone or anything is hard to do even harder when you love them. Parting is also necessary for everyday growth. Most relationships that have ended good and bad have taught us valuable lessons. These lessons aren't to be over looked but to be acknowledged and addressed. This poem is my battle with that.

It occurred to me I'm gonna break your heart one day.

I'm gonna have to separate

I'm gonna have to leave standing in an empty home

Just wondering if I'm still gonna be there for you

And I will

I will do whatever come whenever

But I can't grow here

I can't flourish here

I can't stay here

It occur to me I'm going to break your heart

And it broke mine too

Because their is no one in the world I would want to hurt less than you

No one I would want to make cry less than you

But I don't have a voice here

I don't have a choice here

I just sit and I stress with an S on my chest

But no one applauds

No fan club

No autographs

It occurred to me I'll break your heart someday

I just didnt know it would be today.