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Book Review: 'Romancing Your Child's Heart'

Updated on January 27, 2018
tamarawilhite profile image

Tamara Wilhite is an engineer, scifi author and fan and periodically reviews books. You can also read her books Humanity's Edge and Sirat.

Introduction

"Romancing Your Child's Heart" by Monte Swan is intended to teach parents how to help their children develop an emotional connection with Christ. Many parents teach doctrine and share stories but leave out the personal connection to God that helps them remain in the faith as they hit adolescence and the attractions and the distractions of the world start to erode the unformed faith they have.

Disclaimer: The publisher provided me with a complimentary copy of the book through BookCrash.

Points in Favor of "Romancing Your Child's Heart"

Some of the best advice in this book is the section about filling your life with God's love and words, not just a dutiful lesson on Sundays. And while you want to be intentional in sharing your faith, simply raining down stories of judgment and sin will have the opposite effect than what you intend long term, though it may scare a child into obedience. Discuss God's love and grace with your children and what God does for them in a visceral, age appropriate manner. And you can share your love for God when you share passions that bring you closer to God such as music and nature.

The author points out how "rebellion" isn't inevitable and isn’t even natural. Yes, your children will struggle to define their own identity separate from the parents' and the family unit, but that doesn't mean they will turn 180° and reject everything unless the home environment seems oppressive or overly restrictive. Giving them a spiritual connection to God early on and freedom to develop it in their own ways (under guidance) can give them the confidence to remain in the faith even as they grow and change.

The author brings up how children learn through stories. The author brings up the Narnia book series, and these would be a great set of books to give your older children to read. "Marian's Big Book of Bible Stories", which he mentions, is a good choice for younger children. Other books are mentioned in the book, as well as many tips to engage your children at many levels to deepen their faith.

The author brings up the problem of fighting liberal secular culture for your child's heart and mind, and that simply going to church isn't enough. After all, many churches bring in lessons based on the latest cultural phenomena, giving it a Christian veneer and seeming acceptability, leading kids to watch movies and read books with messages contrary to what the parents want them to learn. "Romancing Your Child's Heart" by Monte Swan refers to a number of books and Biblical passages on this topic if you want to read more about that subject.

The book is under 300 pages and an easy read.

Points against the Book

The author spends too long speaking about his own spiritual development. The discussions of how his own parents raised him are relevant but read as if it is an autobiography, not a parenting guide. And a sizable plurality of this book is his life story.

While there are organizations like AHG that provide fun ways to connect with other kids and Christ, what can parents do on their own to help their children grow in their faith?
While there are organizations like AHG that provide fun ways to connect with other kids and Christ, what can parents do on their own to help their children grow in their faith? | Source

Observations

Romancing Your Child's Heart" by Monte Swan has a section I can summarize best by quoting Dr. Laura – quality time requires quantity time. Don't expect to spend a couple of afternoons with your child and offset all the pressures of the world, and you don't know which moments and memories will create that deep spiritual connection you want the child to have. And getting to those deep, meaningful conversations with your child may take a whole day to reach.

Remember to join organizations that reinforce your beliefs and goals for your children, so that it isn't just you against the world. And whether it is American Heritage Girls or a church youth group that is diligent in teaching the values you believe, this helps parents not seem to be opposite of the world, and it helps reinforce what parents teach while reducing the contrary views their children are exposed to.

Summary

If you want to ensure that your children grow with Christ and develop a deep personal attachment to God that will last a lifetime, this book addresses the need to take on that challenge as part of an intentional part of parenting and gives many good resources and action steps to achieve that goal.

Comments

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  • tamarawilhite profile imageAUTHOR

    Tamara Wilhite 

    9 months ago from Fort Worth, Texas

    Sukhneet Kaur Bhatti Thank you for the compliment.

  • sukhneet profile image

    Sukhneet Kaur Bhatti 

    2 years ago from India

    Hi,

    I read your article and must say that the review is well justified. Well, I do not have much idea about Christianity because I am not a Christian, but I can only say that a long-lasting faith in God is something that can be developed in the kids only when they get to learn about the true meaning of faith within their households. Sharing personal experiences with kids regarding their firm believe on God even during the times of crisis and how God created a set of events to make things move in a positive direction.

    Also, it is important to make them understand what we get from life is our destiny and we should accept life as it comes to us without complaining to God. People who have just a right attitude towards God's judgment are never unhappy in life.

  • Say Yes To Life profile image

    Yoleen Lucas 

    2 years ago from Big Island of Hawaii

    These are good ideas. I grew up in a very negative household, but became a devout Christian because of a fabulous church operated summer camp I was fortunate to attend for 8 summers, and a Christian high school that saved my life. I need to warn you, though; just because someone is a Christian as a child does not mean they will be as an adult. Being subjected to numerous extreme negative events in which God doesn't help can kill the flame. In those instances, there's not much parents can do; God must speak for Himself.

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