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Sass and Ass

Updated on June 28, 2011
Thank you Katie Tegtmeyer on Flickr for this photo. http://www.flickr.com/photos/katietegtmeyer/
Thank you Katie Tegtmeyer on Flickr for this photo. http://www.flickr.com/photos/katietegtmeyer/

Smart ass you call me

Smart I’ll agree

With the perfect ass

For the shape of your hand

You’ll agree

And sass I must admit

I suppose I’m full

Of it

Shall we reconvene

In a moment I could be

Sweetness and light

If that is what you’d rather

Not in the mood for sweet

Perhaps some other sticky treat

Oh there I go, my randy side

Always wants to play

Too rough sometimes

Best keep your feelings up

Off the floor

Lest they catch

The heel of my boots

Made for walking

For me, a fence

Lady like and tender care

To the left

Fire fueled with flesh and vinegar

To the right

And here I am like a cat on a two by four

Struttin’ my stuff under a full moon

With a little girl smile

And a spark of devil in the eyes

It’s all true you say

Sass and ass, love and light

Simplicity is found

In the sacrifices made

To the night

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    • Randy Behavior profile image
      Author

      Randy Behavior 6 years ago from Near the Ocean

      My Dad used to say, "alright little miss smarty pants!" The art is in not going to far to the fiesty side of things... I'm still working on that.

    • profile image

      Doug Turner Jr. 6 years ago

      May you always proudly revel in being sassy and assy -- assy in a good way, that is. Not like jack-assy or fat-assy or dumb-assy. Smart-assy is okay, cuz it's fun.

    • Randy Behavior profile image
      Author

      Randy Behavior 7 years ago from Near the Ocean

      Well I like your honesty Kosmo. Maybe something else I've written would suite you better?

    • Kosmo profile image

      Kelley 7 years ago from California

      I love your truly suggestive nickname, and your poem is okay. Honestly, I never know what to say about people's poetry. Good use of vocabulary? Sure. Stay randy, babe. Later!

    • Randy Behavior profile image
      Author

      Randy Behavior 7 years ago from Near the Ocean

      So glad you approve of my silliness.

    • epigramman profile image

      epigramman 7 years ago

      the greatest use and example of the english language since the Magna Carta was issued in 1215!

    • Randy Behavior profile image
      Author

      Randy Behavior 7 years ago from Near the Ocean

      Come as often as you like... but you haven't read all my stuff surely.

    • Micky Dee profile image

      Micky Dee 7 years ago

      Getting some in some "reruns". Thank you!

    • Randy Behavior profile image
      Author

      Randy Behavior 7 years ago from Near the Ocean

      Nice to see you again MFB, I've missed your, oh so sweet comments.

    • MFB III profile image

      MFB III 7 years ago from United States

      Nothing quite as exquisite as unpredictable....and mood swings are even more fun when two ride in tandem....just sweep back with me now, and then let's sit up really really fast together, and giggle at the butterflies that nest in our bellies. Makes me wish I was nearer the ocean..lol Great write. ~~~MFB III

    • Randy Behavior profile image
      Author

      Randy Behavior 7 years ago from Near the Ocean

      Sorry I missed this comment Trooper. Glad you liked it. For some a nice ass is a requirement.

      Hi Chris! Of course "you'd" like my fire line. :) Thanks for coming by for visit.

    • Christoph Reilly profile image

      Christoph Reilly 7 years ago from St. Louis

      Why was I drawn to this title? Hmmm? I love the line, "Fire fueled with flesh and vinegar." Very hot...it SSssssssizzzzzles!

    • trooper22 profile image

      trooper22 7 years ago from Chicago

      Better a smart ass, than a dumb ass I always say. And a Nice ass is a BONUS!! Rockin poem Randy!!

    • Randy Behavior profile image
      Author

      Randy Behavior 7 years ago from Near the Ocean

      Censor-what-ship EM?

      Thanks Micky. Nice to meet you.

    • Micky Dee profile image

      Micky Dee 7 years ago

      Nice. It's good to see the view on the other side.

    • Enigmatic Me profile image

      7 years ago from East Coast Canada

      Censorship does not reign in here ;)

      Thanks be to... lol

    • Randy Behavior profile image
      Author

      Randy Behavior 7 years ago from Near the Ocean

      Greetings Cris. Just tellin' it like mine is I guess. Thanks.

      Hi Blonde, long time no see. An ass in hand is worth two hands on your.... no, that's not right. A bush in hand is worth two... damn thats not right either.

    • blondepoet profile image

      blondepoet 7 years ago from australia

      Makes me proud to be a woman with a cute little posterior.

    • Cris A profile image

      Cris A 7 years ago from Manila, Philippines

      no one waxes poetically about the dichotomy of womanhood better than you do, Ms B!

    • Randy Behavior profile image
      Author

      Randy Behavior 7 years ago from Near the Ocean

      Hi MM! Some days I live up to it, some days.

    • Mighty Mom profile image

      Susan Reid 7 years ago from Where Left is Right, CA

      Damn. Just missed ya! night, Randy! You are one aptly named hubber, alright! Grrrrrrrrr. MM

    • Randy Behavior profile image
      Author

      Randy Behavior 7 years ago from Near the Ocean

      Oh AIDY now that you've come and given me a "fierceness," I can call it a day. My strength went to bed an hour ago leaving my femininity to clean out my in-box. Now with my "superhug" in hand I'm hitting the hay.

      Good Night sweet Sandy.

    • profile image

      Am I dead, yet? 7 years ago

      My dearest sassy Randy! Now I take it that these words amount to staunch sexiness and boots! What is more hotter on a woman? A great ass and boots, long legged black boots! I adore how you write with pure femininity and strength...sensuality--and yes fierceness!

      -Superhugs- dear Randy!

    • Randy Behavior profile image
      Author

      Randy Behavior 7 years ago from Near the Ocean

      logic,commonsense - Thanks for coming by for a read. Just another day in the life of me.

      Hi Blaise! Glad you liked it. :)

    • blaise25 profile image

      Fehl Dungo 7 years ago from close to you...

      sexy sweet..loved it! :)

    • profile image

      logic,commonsense 7 years ago

      Thanks for another interesting poem! Love to read them!

    • Randy Behavior profile image
      Author

      Randy Behavior 7 years ago from Near the Ocean

      Oh gosh, I don't offend so easy. I just meant perhaps I am more like the silly cat from Shrek really, but in my mind I'm all cat woman. lol.

    • I*n*v*i*c*t*u*s profile image

      I*n*v*i*c*t*u*s 7 years ago

      Randy, you so symbolize a great cat women. Very inticing. I hope my comment did not offend... ( my child mind plays to

      'these boots are made for walkin' is all!) :)

    • Randy Behavior profile image
      Author

      Randy Behavior 7 years ago from Near the Ocean

      Hi Invictus! I was thinking cat woman when I wrote this but...

    • I*n*v*i*c*t*u*s profile image

      I*n*v*i*c*t*u*s 7 years ago

      Randy, (words of AIDY) are Fierce! :) You have the sass down well.. Have to say though, ever since Shrek the 'puss n boots' visual changed for me. Needless to say, is giggled a bit through this. Though, you go girl!

    • Randy Behavior profile image
      Author

      Randy Behavior 7 years ago from Near the Ocean

      Greetings Xuniei.

      EM, I try to stay sweet but I really am a smart ass at heart.

      Hi Tantrum! Thanks for stopping by always nice to see you. Nice avatar your sporting!

    • tantrum profile image

      tantrum 7 years ago from Tropic of Capricorn

      SASSY !!LOL I buy it ! :)

    • Enigmatic Me profile image

      7 years ago from East Coast Canada

      Randy, sweet and sour is a good combination... don't knock it! ;) Chili's thrown in and all...

    • xunlei profile image

      xunlei 7 years ago

      yeah,great

      I'll keep your post

    • Randy Behavior profile image
      Author

      Randy Behavior 7 years ago from Near the Ocean

      Well hello my muse; your comment leaves me speechless. Good thing you know how to read my body language.

    • Randy Behavior profile image
      Author

      Randy Behavior 7 years ago from Near the Ocean

      EM, is that what I am sweet and sour? I suppose I am, with lots of those red hot chili flakes thrown in :)

    • Your Muse profile image

      Your Muse 7 years ago

      You're killing me, and breathing life into me at the same time...oh you're love is so wickedly sweet.

    • Enigmatic Me profile image

      7 years ago from East Coast Canada

      The sweet and sour soul always brings with it a tinge of mystery... guess that's why we always come back... keep it coming!

    • Randy Behavior profile image
      Author

      Randy Behavior 7 years ago from Near the Ocean

      Hi Dohn! You are the first comment on so many of my poems, thanks for that. I'm not going anywhere, just need to strut some times. That's all :)

      Well hello Tom! I'm glad you like this one. Thanks for coming by.

      Greetings Floating Mind, it's nice to meet you :)

    • floating mind profile image

      floating mind 7 years ago from Chicago, Illinois

      Nice poem. I like the edge on it. Sharp!

    • Tom Rubenoff profile image

      Tom Rubenoff 7 years ago from United States

      There is nothing with out its opposite, as this poem shows. Nice stuff, Randy

    • dohn121 profile image

      dohn121 7 years ago from Hudson Valley, New York

      Love the fire, Randy...I like the anatomy too :D Good work as usual! By the way, don't walk too far away with those boots of yours, lol. At least leave some bread crumbs so we can follow you, wherever you may go :D