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She's Full of Hot Air

Updated on November 17, 2015

Two old long time friends decided one day to go out on the town for a night of fun to try to forget about all of their worries and sorrows in their life. Joe and Randy figured after a long night of drinking and club hopping that the two of them would head on down to the brothel on the far edge of town. Neither of them had any idea whatsoever $6 what was in store for the two of them next. However the very alert doorman saw them, from a good distance away weaving and stumbling, as they proceeded up the steep long curving driveway towards him. The watchful doorman then gave the heads up to the owner. Who whispered to her manager to go up to the first two bedrooms and put an inflated doll in each of the beds. The owner figured that both Joe and Randy were too drunk to know the difference, and that there was no sense in wasting two of the girls on either of them. The manager did as he was told, and both Joe and Randy went on upstairs and took care of their business and departed. As they both were walking home Joe said you know, I think my girl was dead, because she never moved or made a single sound the whole time I was with her. Randy told him that it could have been a lot worse, because he thought his was a witch. When I was with her and kissing her neck, I gave her a little bite, and then all of a sudden she loudly passed some gas, and flew straight out of the window taking my teeth with her. Joe agreed with the toothless Randy, and said that this just wasn't a good day. The two drunk buddies spent the rest of the night looking around in the night sky for that witch with Randy's teeth, but they never did find her.

While you are still here and before you go, I figured I'd kill two stones with one bird. I mean one hub, well you know what I mean. I'd now like to answer the age old question - If a tree falls in the woods, and there's nobody around, does it make a sound? I just got finished taking a walk in the woods, and a large tree fell while I was there. The tree did make a sound, but only to me, and since nobody else was around, no one else heard it. I think that's just about as close to answering this question as we will ever get. In a future hub we will explore, and try to answer the question - Does a bear go to the bathroom in the woods? Maybe the next time I take a walk in the woods I'll see what a bear does.

Can I get some privacy around here!
Can I get some privacy around here!
5 out of 5 stars from 1 rating of this Hub

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    • eugbug profile image

      Eugene Brennan 5 years ago from Ireland

      This gave me a great laugh this morning!

    • profile image

      Deb Welch 5 years ago

      Funny and Up. Cute stuff.

    • Lightshare profile image

      Lightshare 5 years ago

      Just -) -) ha!

    • Rosemay50 profile image

      Rosemary Sadler 5 years ago from Hawkes Bay - NewZealand

      Hylarious story, loved it

    • Teylina profile image

      Teylina 5 years ago

      Love this! Clever and Funny.!

    • Angie Jardine profile image

      Angie Jardine 5 years ago from Cornwall, land of the eternally youthful mind ...

      There is also that other enduring koan ‘If a husband says something and his wife isn’t there to hear it, is he still wrong?’

      Funny hub ... I just love a good laugh!

    • Amy Becherer profile image

      Amy Becherer 5 years ago from St. Louis, MO

      Hilarious story that I'm sure the two drunken a-holes never caught wind of. I laughed out loud envisioning Randy's teeth out the window and down on the street.

    • aviannovice profile image

      Deb Hirt 5 years ago from Stillwater, OK

      What an amusing story. Did Randy ever replace his teeth?

    • shiningirisheyes profile image

      Shining Irish Eyes 5 years ago from Upstate, New York

      Hole story! This was great! I so enjoy a hub that brings a hearty laugh and this one did just that. Great writing.

      Happy to be following you.

    • phoenix2327 profile image

      Zulma Burgos-Dudgeon 5 years ago from United Kingdom

      Knowing human nature like I do, I have no reason to doubt the veracity of this story.

      It doesn't matter. It was still a good laugh. I'm sending my husband this link. He'll love this.

    • kj force profile image

      kjforce 5 years ago from Florida

      TheHoleStory.....please contact the local county sheriff's office..asap

      your yellow balloon witch is lying in our pool..and is causing quite a riff..the authorities are claiming murder as Randy's teeth are still in her neck...

      Loved your sick A%# humor !!!! I will be sharing this one....have a great week-end...

    • writer20 profile image

      Joyce Haragsim 5 years ago from Southern Nevada

      I fully enjoyed your laughable story. When I saw the yellow balloon I knew I was in for a good laugh, thank you.

      Voted up and funny (no surprise).

      I hope your having a great weekend, Joyce.