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The Better Side of Grief

Updated on June 25, 2020
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Kathi writes about fossils and other earthly subjects, plus the natural fauna of Michigan, features in her community, poetry, and more.

The Better Side of Grief

To all those who have lost a loved one, my deepest sympathy. I hope this letter written in honor of my husband's memory has a healing effect on you today as it has for me. It's true what they say, there's always a silver lining at the end of every tragedy life presents. I have discovered mine through the pain caused by the loss of my husband. My prayers for peace found in the process of your journey through grief!

My dearest husband,

it’s been fifteen months since

you passed into the spirit world

Last time I counted fifteen months for anything

was when our youngest boy had reached that age

Now he’s twenty three

and you would be so proud of him and our oldest, too

Well, I had one of those crying spells today

At least they’re coming fewer and farther in between

Some days, I just wish I could end this pain

and leave this world to be with you,

but then I come to my senses

I know how much I'm needed here

I’m reading an uplifting book, Conversations with God, by Neale Donald Walsch

In it, God says, "Grief is a natural emotion

It’s that part of you which allows you to say goodbye

when you don’t want to say goodbye

When you’re allowed to express your grief, you get rid of it

Grief that is continually repressed becomes chronic depression

People have killed because of chronic depression, wars have started, nations fallen"

Such wise words He speaks

You recognize wisdom when you hear it even though you're not there yet

Anyway, I don’t know if I would be on this path of knowing Him better,

that is, if it weren’t for this wrenching grief I own

Though, I must tell you, the good news is that it has opened my heart

and God has ignited many new pathways for me

to see His truth

feel His love

sense His peace

and grow my own soul

I am wiser for it, and have made leaps spiritually,

but then you know that

I feel your love inside my soul and your presence all around me

every day and every night, guiding us

watching over me and our boys

I want you to know how grateful I am for that

My grief is only another expression of my love for you

And as this pain continues to fade, my love for you will only continue

to grow stronger because I will be stronger for having survived this fate

of mine and yours,

and our sons who lost the best dad ever

Promise to take care of yourself

and I will do the same until our joyous reunion

some day on the other side

© 2011 Kathi Mirto


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