THIS ONE'S FOR YOU, SHARYN...by b. Malin

A few days ago Sharyn, who also writes on Hub Pages, under the name of "Sharyn's Slant" and is Enjoyed by many of us here, came onto my Hub, "LOSING YOUR HEAD". She left me the following Comments.

Sharyn's Slant - You know B. you could take a trip to the "Bathroom" and make a Super Story out of it.:) Seriously, this Hub was very Enjoyable. Thanks for the Giggles.

b. Malin - Funny you should say that Sharyn, because I did have a "Bathroom Trip" while out shopping the other day that could be my Next Hub!

So dear Hubber Friend Sharyn, this one's for you, and the Coincidence of the Moment... And Your Fun thoughts... The following happened to me the other day. The names have been changed to protect the guilty.

Lover Man and I are shopping in a well known Retail Store here in Sunny Florida. We are looking for "things" to buy for the "Condo With the View". Which we haven't yet "Closed On". But are hoping for an early Closing...like hopefully next week. So, what are we buying? Things for the Kitchen, like dishes, glasses, silverware...NECESSITIES! I had told my sister I wasn't buying Anything until after The Closing. I said during our last phone conversation, that I was superstitious. I said, "remember how when we were pregnant many, many, Moons ago...we never brought anything into the house until after the baby came"? She said, "I knew you'd say that".

Anyway, so there we are shopping away, when I announced to Lover Man, "I have to go to the Bathroom". He replies, "Of course you do...and actually I do too". So we decided to take turns, because we didn't want to leave the shopping cart filled with all our Treasures. I say, "You go first, because you're quicker". He smiles a knowing smile as he turns to leave. He goes and comes back, and now it is MY turn. I don't know what it is about Women and shopping and having to go...

I enter the Ladies Room and find I have it all to myself. I select the Stall that has it's own Sink and Mirror...Ok, ok, I know, it's the "Handicapped Stall"...but it's so Nice, and I'm going to be quick! DON'T JUDGE...and if you're Honest, you'll admit to doing it too, occasionally. So I settle in.

Suddenly the Ladies Room door swings open and in comes a Woman, who is TALKING LOUDLY on her Cell Phone.

Her Conversation: "Wait Ceil, I'll put you on SPEAKER PHONE, I'm in the Ladies Room at "H---G----." I hear her go to the first stall where she announces, "There's no paper in the stall, wait Ceil, I'm taking you to the next Stall". And she precedes to do so. That STALL is right next to mine!

"Ok Ceil, I'm settled in, can you hear me"? Ceil, replies that she can. They go on to have a Conversation about this Friend of theirs who is dating a new man...her husband has been dead close to a year now, and she's gone through a few LOSERS, but this could be "THE ONE". "Listen Fran, (Ceil is talking) Doris wants us to join her at the movie theater to see that "Horse Movie" oh, what's it called...Neither one knows, but I do, do I join this Conversation and tell them? Or do I just sit here quietly...saying Nothing, I Flush, and wash and dry my hands, and then run my comb through my hair and smile into the mirror, before I exit my stall.

Ceil and Fran are still talking away..."We'll meet Doris at four in front of the theater, it's really supposed to be a good movie, I think Stephan Spielberg directed it...isn't that silly I can't remember the name".

I'm about to open the Ladies Room door and enter the world once again, when I turn and say, "War Horse, the name of the movie is "War Horse."

In Unison, they both yell, "Thank You"!