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Updated on June 28, 2011

Too tired to write, too sad not to

There will be no sleep till

My mind is emptied of these images

No sleep till they become words

Heavy shovels of dry dirt

Clumps laid days in the sun

Till the moisture was gone

We knew it would be soon

Skin hanging like old and yellowing drapes

Over rods of bone

Hiding completely the idea

Of any light, of any vibrance

Petite clay bowls painted lively colors

Holding colors orange, ochre even tiny blue

Matching that in your tired eyes

So many pigments to choke down

Images before the cancer

Healthy and I suppose robust

Disappeared deep into a forgotten happy corner

I'd lay my head on them if only I had them


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    • Randy Behavior profile imageAUTHOR

      Randy Behavior 

      7 years ago from Near the Ocean

      Thanks Enigmatic. I'm doing much better with every month that goes by. I should be back to writing randy stuff soon.

    • Enigmatic Me profile image

      7 years ago from East Coast Canada

      Such a change of pace from the lighter airy side. It just goes to show how we writers really are affected by our lives. I wish you well. And commend you on utilizing your writing as part of the grieving process. Reach out if you need to.

    • Nikkij504gurl profile image

      Nikki Wicked 

      7 years ago from Louisiana

      time heals all wounds. just remember the good times with him. and he will always be close in your heart. he may not be here in body, but his presence will still be around.

    • Randy Behavior profile imageAUTHOR

      Randy Behavior 

      7 years ago from Near the Ocean

      Thanks for coming by Hamlet. Not easy but necessary to my healing. Love and light to you as well.

    • McHamlet profile image

      Paul Buckle 

      7 years ago

      Very sensitively done. It's obviously not easy to write about these things but you've done a fine job. Peace.

    • Randy Behavior profile imageAUTHOR

      Randy Behavior 

      7 years ago from Near the Ocean

      My Dad's suffering was awful and yes we prayed for his death. I have no doubts being with him again, but feel sorry for myself in his absence. Its all still very fresh; I haven't fished adjusting to it yet.

    • Nikkij504gurl profile image

      Nikki Wicked 

      7 years ago from Louisiana

      awww this is sad. but lets not think of our loved ones as gone forever, but rather moved to a better place. at least she/he is no longer sick and in pain. I actually wished death upon my grandmother when she was so sick and no doctors could help. she died shortly after and yes i miss her and was very sad but i believe I will see her again. and this was a veryy good write btw.

    • Randy Behavior profile imageAUTHOR

      Randy Behavior 

      7 years ago from Near the Ocean

      Thanks Tony. I appreciate your comment.

      Hi Alekhouse. I amassed a lot of poetry while I was inactive on HP, just trying to finish the process.

      Morning Tom. Thanks for coming by.

    • Tom Rubenoff profile image

      Tom rubenoff 

      7 years ago from United States

      You capture the shared pain of a loved one's difficult departure. Your poem beautiful in its sadness.

    • alekhouse profile image

      Nancy Hinchliff 

      7 years ago from Essex Junction, Vermont

      Thanks for this bit of your wonderful poetry. Looking forward to more.

    • Tony DeLorger profile image

      Tony DeLorger 

      7 years ago from Adelaide, South Australia

      A sad portrayal of impending loss and the ebb and flow of life. As always good imagery. Thanks for sharing. Tony

    • Randy Behavior profile imageAUTHOR

      Randy Behavior 

      7 years ago from Near the Ocean

      Thanks bbnix. Some images need to be purged.

    • bbnix profile image


      7 years ago from Southern California

      Nice vivid imagery. One can place themselves in the moment - "Too tired to write, too sad not to"

      Well done...


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