The Manic Pixie Dream Girl

Film critic Nathan Rabin came up with the term 'Manic Pixie Dream Girl' and it refers to a stock character used in movies who will enter a boy's life and fill his life with brightness and adventure so that he can emerge from his slump and see everything that is right in the world.

Because of course men need women in their lives to be happy. And of course the purpose of women is to be worshipped and used to find happiness.

The character we're talking about usually has some sort of quirky trait like bright hair colour or a bullring in her nose or a bizarre family background. Perhaps she's a little bit off the rails or has strange habits that are slightly disturbing and yet awe inspiring.

Anyway, this representation of character degrades both men and women. It degrades a man's capability to find love in himself rather than another person, and it objectifies women as a means of achieving happiness. (Sorry, I used the dreaded O word...)

There's been lots of controversy over the portrayal of the manic pixie dream girl and it's effect on women, blah blah blah. But the exact same character is often used in men too.

Charming, romantic, usually poor but rich in love will come and sweep the female lead off her feet. We've seen it all before in the romance movies, and nobody has a problem with that? Something seems wrong here...

Well... Either way, whatever the controversy, I've written a poem about how destructive it can be to idolise someone. I hope you enjoy...

My friend was a manic pixie dream girl.

I am not a manic pixie dream girl.

I am not to be placed on a pedestal,

Sought for to find happiness,

Needed for adventure,

Light, colour, or hope.

I can't teach you to embrace life.

Only you can.

And I know it's wrong

To place all your dreams on someone

But still,

I sought out my manic pixie dream girl.

Yes, girls can do that too.

But the pedestal was too high

And I was the only one with my arms stretched to the sky,

Trying with all my might to keep her up there.

And my hope was tall and when it all became too heavy...

My god did she fall.

Expectations do not belong in the mind of a 14 year old girl

Because she is far too young to have explored the world

And if she's on that pedestal she can see for miles,

She can see celebration, love and all of life's trials.

But she can't explore it because as soon as she tries to take a step

She'll fall.

All she wants to do is experience what she can see,

The world is full of so much opportunity.

But I'm the only one holding her up

And the palms of two hands isn't enough

To walk.

So I think: "Hey, maybe what she needs is more."

But I soon realise that more people are worse than just the first

And mass worship proves to be a bigger curse

Because now more people are looking up

And watching her struggle as she gives up

Because she can walk now, on the palms of a thousand hands

But their hopes keep growing and she can barely see the land.

She is relying on us to hold her high.

She is depending on us to stay alive.

But what good is that is she can't enjoy her time?

What good is that if she'd rather die?

But we won't let her fall, her legacy is too strong

And despite all her best efforts we keep holding on

Because she is our hope, our light, our sun.

We have to help her

We have to help her

I have to help her

She deserves recognition for all her efforts and strife,

What can I do to add value to this life?

I find more people to observe her beauty

And I tell them that to save her is their absolute duty.

So we hold her higher and higher and higher still

To protect her from the wars and the conflicts and the ill.

No matter what happens she must stay safe.

But we push her further and further away

Until eventually we can't see her anyway.

And we start to wonder if this was all real

Or if it was just a projection of how we feel.

Meanwhile, she is up there suffocating

Without air to breathe or help to receive

And we can't even see the struggle

So we continue ignorant as she begins to crumble.

With our arms still up stretched

We realise the weight as gone.

So we lower our palms to find...

No one.

We panic and stress as the place starts to swirl,

How on earth can we now have faith in this world?

We need to find another manic pixie dream girl!

I shake my head,

"We've done enough,

We've already killed the girl I love."

But their eyes brighten up when they look to me

And I turn behind me to see what they see

Wait... Is it me they're looking at?

They say to me: "You've taught us well,

You guided us away from hell,

You're the one who introduced us first,

You're the one who saved the world,

YOU are the manic pixie dream girl."

And in a desperate attempt to defend myself I say:

"But so are all of you."

And suddenly people start running scared

About how they'll survive

Balancing on the very tips of five

Tiny fingers from which they are bound to fall

And suddenly it clicks.

They were wrong after all.

And before long our hands aren't pushing people away.

Instead, they're interlocking, keeping each other safe.

Men and women alike hold each other close

And guard each other in turn from Earth's deadly foes

And to these issues we must stay awake

Because love can be just as destructive as hate

Because to worship, to idolise is to push away

And in an attempt to protect, we isolate.

My friend was so alone in this world.

Because my friend, was a manic pixie dream girl.