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Bittersweet Poetry: Cloud Watching

Updated on June 9, 2013

Pretty little pictures,

Put away

Left to be seen another day.

Memories of you and me,

Two kids at play

Staring at the clouds in May.


Blanket spread out,

We laid atop our little knoll.

Our tale of love beginning to unfold.

I grabbed your hand,

Daring to be bold,

Hoping not to be left in the cold.


You took my hand

We looked into each others eyes,

And kissed beneath a cloudy sky.

My heart was racing,

I didn't know why.

I just felt so happy I could cry.


This was our special place,

Where we spoke our love aloud.

The place where we watched the clouds.

Our little secret,

No one else allowed.

The place where we watched the clouds.


And in those clouds,

Our future looked bright

We were two love birds in flight,

But the sky turned gray,

And try as I might

I couldn't accept when God took your light.


Those pretty little pictures,

That were put away,

I opened them up today.

I relived those memories

Of two kids at play.

In our very special place,

Where we used to watch the clouds in May



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    • AudreyHowitt profile image

      Audrey Howitt 

      6 years ago from California

      Lovely write! Sad---

    • PHILLYDREAMER profile imageAUTHOR

      Jose Velasquez 

      6 years ago from Lodi, New Jersey

      Cloud Watching is always good wholesome fun. I can't wait for the spring to get here.

    • Angelique Loux profile image

      Angelique Loux 

      6 years ago from Ohio

      Great hub, I love cloud watching.

    • anglnwu profile image

      anglnwu 

      6 years ago

      Enjoyed the read. It's lovely, sad and magical all at once. Thanks for sharing.

    • MartieCoetser profile image

      Martie Coetser 

      6 years ago from South Africa

      Beautiful memories! You've managed to project nostalgia. I like the structure and rhyme. Why do couples stop looking at the clouds once they are properly connected?

    • Gareth Pritchard profile image

      Gareth Pritchard 

      6 years ago from North Wales

      That's really funny because they wont help or at least they don't help me. I said heard in the last comment instead of head and i checked that twice.

    • PHILLYDREAMER profile imageAUTHOR

      Jose Velasquez 

      6 years ago from Lodi, New Jersey

      LOL. That is true, even when you pointed it out in the comment I was like, he just wrote the same thing twice. I'm going to have to get a pair of glasses one of these days.

    • Gareth Pritchard profile image

      Gareth Pritchard 

      6 years ago from North Wales

      Hey do you know, it is about being very focused, you know the words so well inside your heard, that you see them when they are not there, I get it a lot. The thing is, it is so close to the correct word, that others are putting it in as well, when its not there, otherwise they would have said, me included.

    • PHILLYDREAMER profile imageAUTHOR

      Jose Velasquez 

      6 years ago from Lodi, New Jersey

      LOL. I'm so blind it took me 6 re reads to catch that. Thanks.

    • juneaukid profile image

      Richard Francis Fleck 

      6 years ago from Denver, Colorado

      You caught it!

    • Gareth Pritchard profile image

      Gareth Pritchard 

      6 years ago from North Wales

      Is this the typo?

      Out future looked bright

      We were two love birds in flight,

      Should it be?

      Our future looked bright

      We were two love birds in flight,

    • PHILLYDREAMER profile imageAUTHOR

      Jose Velasquez 

      6 years ago from Lodi, New Jersey

      Where is the typo? I can't see it.

    • juneaukid profile image

      Richard Francis Fleck 

      6 years ago from Denver, Colorado

      A nice lyrical poem with the cloudy backdrop. There is one typo that could be removed. Perhaps all of the stanzas except for the last could be in the present tense thus vivifying the experience all the more.

    • Support Med. profile image

      Support Med. 

      6 years ago from Michigan

      Beautifully written, beautifully said. The heart is a home for all emotions. v/r

    • PHILLYDREAMER profile imageAUTHOR

      Jose Velasquez 

      6 years ago from Lodi, New Jersey

      Thank you Rosemay. I hope when you see more of my poetry you will feel the same way.

    • Rosemay50 profile image

      Rosemary Sadler 

      6 years ago from Hawkes Bay - NewZealand

      Beautiful poem. I got here via martie's Precious encounters, to your poetry challenge, a journey worthwhile.

      I love to watch clouds, ever changing, never the same.

      Your poem is delicate and sensitive and beautiful

      I am a new follower

    • PHILLYDREAMER profile imageAUTHOR

      Jose Velasquez 

      6 years ago from Lodi, New Jersey

      Thank you I wanted to write something about deep love that endures even death.

    • PHILLYDREAMER profile imageAUTHOR

      Jose Velasquez 

      6 years ago from Lodi, New Jersey

      Thank you though I may have gotten the idea from the movie Up lol.

    • ThePracticalMommy profile image

      Marissa 

      6 years ago from United States

      I thought I commented on this before but I guess I didn't. This is a beautiful poem of innocent, young love that ended too soon. Well done!

    • tillsontitan profile image

      Mary Craig 

      6 years ago from New York

      Very nice. I got here by way of your hub challenge and I'm glad I did. I didn't notice any cliche's ;) Voted up and beautiful. Thanks for SHARING.

    • PHILLYDREAMER profile imageAUTHOR

      Jose Velasquez 

      6 years ago from Lodi, New Jersey

      Thank you. I feel really welcome here.

    • suziecat7 profile image

      suziecat7 

      6 years ago from Asheville, NC

      A very touching poem. Welcome to HubPages and I'm a fan.

    • PHILLYDREAMER profile imageAUTHOR

      Jose Velasquez 

      6 years ago from Lodi, New Jersey

      Even with the devastation I wanted people to know, that you can hold someone in your heart where they will live even after death.

    • DarkMuse13 profile image

      Christine Buenemann 

      6 years ago from Saint Louis, Mo

      Very delicate and gentle. I can tell all the little feelings from moment to moment throughout the poem... even the devastation at the end. Great job =^_^=

    • PHILLYDREAMER profile imageAUTHOR

      Jose Velasquez 

      6 years ago from Lodi, New Jersey

      Thanks Vinaya. It's one of the most romantic things to do with someone, in my eyes.

    • Vinaya Ghimire profile image

      Vinaya Ghimire 

      6 years ago from Nepal

      Cloud is always intriguing to watch. This is a lovely poem.

    • PHILLYDREAMER profile imageAUTHOR

      Jose Velasquez 

      6 years ago from Lodi, New Jersey

      Thank you Eddy. I'm looking to write more soon are you a poet as well?

    • Eiddwen profile image

      Eiddwen 

      6 years ago from Wales

      Lovley poems and here's to many more.

      Take care

      Eddy.

    • PHILLYDREAMER profile imageAUTHOR

      Jose Velasquez 

      6 years ago from Lodi, New Jersey

      Thank you Pamela. I try to keep my style of writing easy to understand. I look more to pull at the emotions than to go really deep, though I have been practicing my use of metaphor.

    • PHILLYDREAMER profile imageAUTHOR

      Jose Velasquez 

      6 years ago from Lodi, New Jersey

      Thanks Sheila, yes this was my contribution to the Love challenge.

    • Pamela Kinnaird W profile image

      Pamela Kinnaird W 

      6 years ago from Maui and Arizona

      Very beautiful. Simple, clear and poignant images.

    • sheilanewton profile image

      sheilanewton 

      6 years ago from North Shields, UK

      A really special poem. You're such a talented guy, Philly. Is this your love poem contribution?

    • PHILLYDREAMER profile imageAUTHOR

      Jose Velasquez 

      6 years ago from Lodi, New Jersey

      I wanted to represent in a way of young love that lasted forever, and though losing someone is painful at least you were able to have some cherished moments.

    • PHILLYDREAMER profile imageAUTHOR

      Jose Velasquez 

      6 years ago from Lodi, New Jersey

      It's funny you said that because I wrote this poem to Amos Lee's Arms Of A Woman, who kind of gives you that effect in the song.

    • PHILLYDREAMER profile imageAUTHOR

      Jose Velasquez 

      6 years ago from Lodi, New Jersey

      Thanks Gareth, hopefully more of my work will have you stop by.

    • PHILLYDREAMER profile imageAUTHOR

      Jose Velasquez 

      6 years ago from Lodi, New Jersey

      It's been a while since I've written something romantic even if this one was a little sad.

    • PHILLYDREAMER profile imageAUTHOR

      Jose Velasquez 

      6 years ago from Lodi, New Jersey

      Thank you

    • sweethearts2 profile image

      sweethearts2 

      6 years ago from Northwest Indiana

      Beautiful expressions of first love, sharing and loss. Thank you for sharing these feelings. Written beautifully

    • Dim Flaxenwick profile image

      Dim Flaxenwick 

      6 years ago from Great Britain

      This is beautiful. Not only in its content , but the flow of the words was like a mountain stream.

    • Gareth Pritchard profile image

      Gareth Pritchard 

      6 years ago from North Wales

      Nice stuff, worth the time to stop by and even make comment, thanx.

    • ImKarn23 profile image

      Karen Silverman 

      6 years ago

      Philly - You never disappoint - and this is certainly no exception! I felt it...

    • SomewayOuttaHere profile image

      SomewayOuttaHere 

      6 years ago from TheGreatGigInTheSky

      ...excellent

    • PHILLYDREAMER profile imageAUTHOR

      Jose Velasquez 

      6 years ago from Lodi, New Jersey

      I'm glad you enjoyed the poem. I hope it wasn't as painful experience as i have described.

    • sarcasticool profile image

      sarcasticool 

      6 years ago from New Zealand

      I like this poem very much, it invokes feelings in me I can relate to. Nicely put together. Thank you for sharing this.

      Voted up :)

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