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Too Close to the Edge

Updated on August 22, 2013
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I'm stuck in neutral.


I was sure I was moving forward...
But I caught myself scooting back again.


Now I'm somewhere in the middle.


I usually steer clear of the edge,
tend to keep a good distance from that sort of drop off.


Sure, there's a railing to block my fall
But it's too flimsy and I rarely trust it.


Lately, though, I've been playing daredevil.


I've inched closer and closer still,
Peered over the edge even.

But I still pulled myself back.


I once let a toe ease across so I could stare down the steep rocky cliff.


I know I could leap.

I know I could jump right off.


I would probably just float easily down to the bottom,
Find the cool waters flowing there and bathe in them.


 

But the fear of the fall makes me nauseous and pulls me back every time.

 

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    • To Start Again profile image
      Author

      Selina Kyle 4 years ago

      Thank you Colin and lovely to see you. I feel like I'm on the tightrope too often in life sometimes...but it is fun to walk it in writing, you are right :)

    • epigramman profile image

      epigramman 4 years ago

      Well I love walking the edge or the creative tightrople in my writing because it's all pre-meditated, lol, but when we have to walk that edge in real life then it's a different story isn't it. Love your witty, breezy style but your words also have a lot of truth to them as well.

      Sending you warm wishes from Colin and his cats at lake erie time 3:18pm

    • profile image

      DoorMattnomore 6 years ago

      That sounds like me, its been a life long problem of mine that if I can't do something the way I think it should be done I won't even try. As Ive gotten older I've gotten better about it, but there always seems to be room for improvement.

    • To Start Again profile image
      Author

      Selina Kyle 6 years ago

      mckbirdsbks-thank you! That is a nice way to think of it, a new beginning...which is sometimes just as terrifying!

      DMNM- I wonder sometimes if it is the fear that when we spread our arms o fly, we learn we are merely penguins unable to soar that holds us back. Scared to fail so we don't even try...I think I just delved into my own psyche on that one LOL

    • profile image

      DoorMattnomore 6 years ago

      Ahhh, people always say they are afraid of heights, I always say I am afraid of the edge. That little voice inside that says...you could just hurl yourself right over. Just jump, spread your arms and fly. But I would guess neutral in the middle is worse then pondering leaping. Great hub. :)

    • mckbirdbks profile image

      mckbirdbks 6 years ago from Emerald Wells, Just off the crossroads,Texas

      Sometimes, so I've heard, the edge is the beginning, not the end. You've captured a universal feeling, and expressed it well.

    • To Start Again profile image
      Author

      Selina Kyle 6 years ago

      Hi Chris! I have been floating around trying to make some headway on my writing. I left the internet behind for a bit in hopes of making some serious progress. Then I realized how much I missed all of this so now I'm back :) As for the piece, I would say...maybe both? ;)

      Haunty- hello there sweets :) I will probably always entertain that thought....

      Q--thank you! The edge is scary sometimes, isn't it? But it still lures us out to it.

    • What Is Q profile image

      Adam 6 years ago from Tennessee

      Wow, this was great. Completely summed up what I've been feeling for the past couple of years. Moving forward, moving back, always hanging by the edge of a cliff that I still haven't found the courage to step off of. Excellent writing and thumbs up.

    • Haunty profile image

      Haunty 6 years ago from Hungary

      You're still entertaining the thought of the edge?

    • Christoph Reilly profile image

      Christoph Reilly 6 years ago from St. Louis

      Hi Janetta! So, where have you been? Loved the piece. An allegory for life or love? You will probably float down gently, or perhaps, rise up on the wings of wind!