Top 10 Most Garbage Words Ever
Greetings fellow book nerds, bloggers, and idle internet wanderers. This post is a nice little break from last week’s pleasant discussion of murder and familial dysfunction. But never fear; it is sure to bring you just as much food for thought.
While I will not be exploring the tortuous human condition through various forms of literature, I will be exploring a different kind of torture today, the kind brought to us by the sick and twisted labyrinth that we know as the freaking dictionary. Or just, you know, language.
Listed below for your viewing pleasure are the top 10 most useless wastes of letters and space to ever be conceived by mankind. They will enable you to find new ways to spice up the conversation and lose all your friends.
Pretentiousness, Ho!
10) Pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanokoniosis
This may look like someone just fell asleep on the keyboard, but it’s an actual word that pertains to a specific lung disease. Can you imagine being diagnosed with this? If it doesn’t actually kill you, I’m pretty sure you’d be dead anyway by the time the doctor finished pronouncing it.
(9) Hippopotomonstrosesquipedalian
This is a word defined as a word that has been coined to make a very long word. Now they’re just screwing with us. I wonder what jackass thought this one up?
(8) Floccinaucinihilipilification
This 29-letter bad boy is defined as the estimation of something worthless. Much like its own existence.
(7) Moribund
Though hardly the most unusual word on this list, I’ve included it here because it sounds like a reference to some kind of delicious pastry, which gives me infinite amounts of delight. Strictly speaking, this term means obsolete, approaching death, or being in a state of “inactivity.” Basically if this word is ever applied to you, call a priest or your mamma ‘cuz it’s pretty much all over.
(6) Eleemosynary
This means charitable. So you should just the word “charitable.”
(5) Coruscating
Refers to something brilliant, which is the exact opposite of 90% of this bullcrap we call the English language.
(4) Autochthonous
This means indigenous or native, much like the feelings of hatred that arise within me whenever I read words that are barely pronounceable.
(3) Sprezzatura
Studied nonchalance, an important skill to master when reading lists of excessively long words.
(2) Aggrandizement
Enlargement or extension. Insert dirty pun here.
(1) And the number one most ridiculous word ever is 189, 819 letters, so I’m afraid I can’t actually spell it out for you here. However, here’s a link to a three hour video of a guy pronouncing it. Watch it because you know you have nothing better to do for three hours (certainly not live life or anything):
Sources (a.k.a., others like myself who dwell in isolation and prefer to spend their time looking up things that are most likely to annoy other people on the internet):
Dictionary.com
http://grammar.yourdictionary.com/word-lists/longest-words-in-the-english-language.html
http://www.oxforddictionaries.com/us/words/what-is-the-longest-english-word
http://www.pompousasswords.com/www/index.htm
