Why Going on Vacation Drives Me Crazy

Each year my wife and sit down and plan out yearly vacation. This usually means list after list of what we need to take along for the ride. As I read each list I feel my back begin to hurt.

When vacation time is near she packs the bags, according to lists, then I lug all the stuff out to the car. My wife packs the car. Why, you might ask. Well let’s just say it works out the best for both of us if she packs the car.

After the car is loaded we wedge ourselves and the children into what room is left and set off on our trek to vacation bliss. If you'd never had the pleasure of driving to your vacation getaway well you don't know what you're missing.

Traveling by car is the only way to go. Who am I kidding. Driving is the last way you want to go to get your vacation destination.

But if you do choose to drive first be warned you must adjust you attitude about confined spaces. And I do mean confined spaces. If you're lucky you'll have some leg room to work with.

If not then you will find yourself stopping along the way in order to wake up your legs. The longer the trip the more stops you'll make. One year we decided to drive from Pennsylvania to Mississippi. Yeah, we were nuts, but we thought it would a nice ride.

While I'm on the subject of stopping the car. The law of physics dictates the more you put into your body the more the more that needs to come out. In others words drink that 64oz soda and you will need to stop at the bathroom A few miles down the road.

This is not really to much of big deal if you combine them with stopping to revive the circulation in your legs.

Another weird fact about traveling by car is that time seems to slow down. An eight hour trip seems to take at least two days, a trip of sixteen hours, well lets just day I still feel like I am driving to Mississippi and that was four years ago.

Why does time slow down? I think it has something to do with the children constantly arguing over leg space in the back seat while at the same time your spouse is nagging you about missing another turn.

I almost forgot somewhere along the way everything about the trip seems to get more annoying. Anybody ready for another rest stop?

There are people out there who are afraid of going on vacation by car, which is ridiculous. What's there to be afraid of? All the miles, the car fumes, the kids arguing in the backseat, your spouse no longer talking to you because you added a few more hours to the trip because you didn't listen to their directions.

Still, In the end when you'll finally arrive at your vacation spot all will be forgotten when those car doors fly open and the people fall out of the car.

Once you regain the lost the feelings in your legs you"ll rush to check in and collapse on a bed, a couch or whatever other place you can find.

That is unless you're stopped in your tracks by your wife saying, “We have to unload the car”. So you and the kids march back to the car, throw open the back and hope nothing falls on top of you. Well vacation can wait till tomorrow.

Oh yeah, I almost forgot as you lounge away at the beach, the mountains, wherever. Remember,the return trip is just days away.