Years are gone
initially in my experience ,when you lose a loved one.i went in to denial and shock.i lost my Mum who was the most important person in my life.i don't advocate my method of coping,I use two to three years of drinking to help me through the start of it.other family members also helped as we shared the same pain and loss.
Years gone by
YEARS GOING BY
As the years go by,my family gets smaller
People die and are born,then comes a caller
Sometimes good news,sometimes bad
Makes you angry,but also quite sad.
It's the circle of life,circle of death
Year after year,leaves you out of breath.
You need to take it in your stride
Keep your head held high,refuse to hide.
As often as not,more good times than bad
Often upsets you,well really a tad.
Be there when needed,don't become a pest
Make sure your shoulders empty,be ready for the test.
Wee D,sadly missed.
Not so long ago I lost my nephew Donald.he was such a nice guy,my kids adored him.he used to be a regular visitor to my home till we had a stupid falling out,like families do.unfortunately it dragged on for too long,I lost so much precious time with stupid words,time I could have had with Donald.Him being gone has had a profound effect on every person in my family.his mum ,dad and sister have been traumatised immeasurably.I remember his funeral vividly,it was a horrible day I have to say.it hurt me seeing so many of my family members devastated by the loss of our younger familybmember.he is sadly missed,but as I said to my big sister,eventually all you will have is good memories,the hurt and the bad memories eventually go away,not forever,but far enough away that you can carry on.
Close family are the most painful to say goodbye to.I have some amazing memories of wee Donald.he visited often,we had great times as he was such a good natured and caring soul.he adored all my girls,and they in turn were very fond of him.He had a unique way of affecting everyone he came in contact with,and in a good way.He was inevitably too young to die,but sometimes life is cruel,it takes people long before their due date.i just think over the years,your fate can be sealed a lot earlier than you expect sometimes.ive lost lots of family,some young,some old,all went too soon.
The human spirit never ceases to amaze me,just as you think something will break you,the body and mind more often than not finds a way to get through the bad times.
New Coping mechanism.
For many years now ,I've used the medium of writing to express my feelings.if I lose anyone precious to me,I write poems. If I'm angered with stories in the news or round about me,I write.i find it an amazing way to help through the roughest of times.i used to use alcohol,but that wasn't the best thing to do.everyone has the preverbial crutch to lean on.
A few years ago my big brother passed away.i was devastated.my wife and kids were invaluable through this time.i was lost and they did their utmost to look after me.they were amazing,I think I might have lost the plot if I didn't have them close to me.
The Good Times.
As wee boys my brother and me listened to music together.we were never really close as such,but he did have moments when he was trulty a big brother.the time we spent in those moment I will cherish for ever.i have memories of him that aren't great either.But the good memories I have outweigh the bad ones by a fair distance.As time goes on,the pain decreases somewhat,you never forget them,but time does make the loss a bit easier to handle.