ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel

Crappy Poetry

Updated on January 28, 2010

What follows is a collection of some of my crappy poetry from my school days.  I used to go to this really artsy coffee shop with friends in the hipster district, and some of this was created there for and during a weekly open mic night. Yeah, real cerebral stuff, and totally not my style anymore if it even was then, but thought someone might get a kick out of it.

There is a lot of really, really good poetry on HubPages.  I don't think I've ever written a good poem in my life, but hey, I figure there is a lot of really, really bad poetry on HubPages also. The way I see it; chances are that my crappy poetry is not the worst of the worst, but I'll let you people be the judge.  Enjoy!

Pete's Limerick

There once was a boy named Pete
Who was born without any feet.
He never did learn to walk,
But he really knew how to talk,
And he never shut his mouth to eat.

That Pete, he was an ornery cuss,
Chartered himself a Greyhound bus.
He forcefully claimed one whole side,
With no one else allowed to ride,
And provoked all the others into a fuss.

Five Months

Biologic metabolism
Slows in winter time
Smokey winter nights drag by
Live from Milan; hour and a quarter
Lasting for days; three days exactly

Five months to go. Five months to be
Birthed; thrust into the cold winter
World. Perpetually frozen winter lake
Question: how long is five months
How long is the winter time?
City of Angels, New Amsterdam, living on
The bayou. Drunken madness, reefer madness
Miles and Chuck D together at last.

No need to explain, five months to complain,
Take a ride on a train, and I am attending.
S'okay, man, 'cause this world's full
Of crap, and you're your own best friend.
Panhandling looks okay on paper?
Enough cash to eat on?
What's that education worth
Living in a cardboard box?

A goldfish in a bowl has more dignity
Than most people met on the street.
How long is five months to the goldfish?
Has one ever lived that long?
Flush it down the toilet; dead eyes staring
As it swirls down around the plumbing.
Frozen in five months of winter
Time there is nowhere to go.


What do you say to a world
No longer inclined to listen
Who to express hopes dreams desires
What liquid will quench this fire

Die a little each day you're repressed
You never could have guessed
All your actions are final
Responsibility opposes denial

Lie to me again I refuse the truth
I fear the regrettable loss of youth
You tell me things are just fine
But this world swallowed your mind

Decide to live your own life
Choices made are all mine
We give no more of ourselves
And no longer reside in your hell


It's good to see It's good for health
It's good to be yourself
And let your soul
Find its way back home
It's good to watch It's good to wait
It's even good to hate
Those who try to keep you down


This website uses cookies

As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at:

Show Details
HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the or domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)
ClickscoThis is a data management platform studying reader behavior (Privacy Policy)