ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel

from A Squandered Life / Eberhard '52

Updated on April 10, 2016
vrdm profile image

Born without a clue. A lifetime later, situation largely unchanged. Nevertheless, one perseveres.....

I tried frenziedly to punch them to death....

One day Mari-Ann announced that we were going around to visit some people called Mortons in the village. For some inexplicable reason she wanted us to scrub up and put on some clean clothes, but she happened to mention that there was a boy there who had an electric train, so we were very quickly on programme.

We were shown, smart and clean, into a house full of strangers but I didn't clock any of them. All I could think of or do was look and look for this fabled train. After what seemed like an eternity, the boy of the house - introduced to us as Jeremy - led the way down to a playroom in the cellar. As I came down the stairs I saw a circle of track on the floor and, as I got closer, made out a magnificently industrial looking black engine and some ornate wagons. These were impressive enough in themselves, but Jeremy squatted down beside an ominous looking pale green metal box with a big fat dial on it and wires trailing in and out. He threw a switch and something hummed, but as he turned the dial, miracle of miracles, the train began slowly to move. It headed off down its track, untouched by human hands, and picked up speed.

Jeremy got it clattering around its circuit like a chattering box of scissors, and looked up at us, beaming with pride. We watched, dumbstruck, overwhelmed by the sight and the sound and the smell of ozone which somehow magnified the importance of what we were seeing. After a few moments of mesmerised rapture, Jeremy upped the ante by asking us if we'd like to turn the dial. Harry and I looked at each other, then scrambled over to the ominous metal box and took turns making the train slow down and speed up and slow down and stop and start and speed up and so on for what seemed like forever.

Not long afterwards Jeremy and his family moved two doors down from us on the Lakeshore - into the very Cobweb Manor - and our relationship with him and with the Manor was ratcheted up a few gears as we found yet more in common. Jeremy fit chronologically between myself and my brother. This meant that he was more in thrall to Harry and more likely to be dismissive of me. This created interesting dynamics because Harry, by the same chrono-logic, was often dismissive of Jeremy. Our lop-sided triangle was sometimes augmented by the appearance of Eberhard, a friend of Jeremy's from his previous life. Eberhard used to pick up on the nuances of our three-way relationship and would find them hysterically funny. This would usually set Jeremy and Harry off too which left me not understanding what the fuck was so funny, odd man out, and getting angrier by the minute - which made Eberhard laugh even harder and spin the whole thing even further out of control. I recall getting so enfuriated that I would physically attack all three of them, but they were so helpless with laughter that all they could do was collapse in the face of my onslaught and roll on the floor as I tried frenziedly to punch them to death.

Jeremy's chrono seniority to me was reinforced at the school playground when I eventually made it to there. He would appear with a mob of his mature mates and condescendingly say “hello” and swoop off to do whatever mature boys did. To be fair, I saw more of him than I did of my brother who always seemed distant and totally immersed in even more mature processes. But Jeremy didn't stay long at that school and was soon spirited off to a private one by his British parents who bought into the value of such things. So our association with Jeremy became exclusively a holiday one which I suppose gave it an extra fillip.



© 2013 Deacon Martin

Comments

    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment

    • vrdm profile imageAUTHOR

      Deacon Martin 

      5 years ago from Bristol, UK

      Hard to say JP. In those days, didn't really have an outlook on life much beyond "what about ME?"

    • JPPhilips profile image

      JPPhilips 

      5 years ago from SC Piedmont Area

      Interesting relationship. Did it change your outlook on life?

    working

    This website uses cookies

    As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, hubpages.com uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

    For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at: https://hubpages.com/privacy-policy#gdpr

    Show Details
    Necessary
    HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
    LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
    Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
    AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
    Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
    CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the googleapis.com or gstatic.com domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
    Features
    Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
    Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
    Marketing
    Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
    Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
    Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
    Statistics
    Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
    ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)