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My Apology

Updated on December 28, 2013
Love sometimes comes like a dream and leaves like a nightmare
Love sometimes comes like a dream and leaves like a nightmare | Source
It hurts to let go, but sometimes it hurts more to hold.
It hurts to let go, but sometimes it hurts more to hold. | Source
One day, someone will walk into your life and make you see why it never worked out with anyone else.
One day, someone will walk into your life and make you see why it never worked out with anyone else. | Source

Staring at you from afar, I couldn't help but wonder about us. I couldn't help but feel joyful at the thought of being us together... what a sweet, gentle and great man you are. I bet a lot of girls were wishing my wishes too, they are day dreaming about you too. But what a lucky girl I am, because I got to hold your hand as we walk, stare at your eyes as we talk and lean close to you whenever I feel like it... I wonder if you did noticed all this things, was I being too obvious or was I being too conscious...

Unaware of the reality that is happening inside me, I guess a newly blossomed emotion finally seized me.

I was ready to leave my past behind, move on with you... only if you let me too. Only if you let me in to your life. How I wish you can love me back and accept me for what I am to you, you will fight for me and will stand for our love, you who will stay beside me through all the ups and downs of this unending game of life.... Taking the chance of this new found love with you turned out to be risky. I know sooner or later consequences are to be faced. Despite it all, I am willing to take chances with you. Because I know, I'd rather fight for this feeling now than end up hoping and wishing of could have been and might have been.

But then, this isn't what you intended us to be. There will never be "us". Behind all the gestures you show, I mean just a friend to you and despite all the realities I know, I still can't hide this hope that maybe someday you will come to realize what I truly mean to you. Maybe I was too quick to assume that somewhere inside your heart you feel the same way that I do. Or maybe you were coward enough to pursue what you truly feel for me too. Or maybe the chance wasn't just timely for both of us. But even at the vagueness of this all, I am still hoping that at least you can tell me what I have been longing to hear... cause I just can't seem to deny that I still sigh at times of what could have been and might have been and I apologize for still holding on to this.

Crying Heart

So true
And undeniable
But unreciprocated
By a coward
Like you

Why
didn't you confide
Why
do you still hide
How long should I wait?

My heart
cries for you
My mind
Thinks of no one
But you

What
Are you afraid of?
What
Should I do?
I need you right now.

Your eyes
Speaks of love
Your words
Speaks of friendship
Where do I really stand?

I sigh
I cry
Things can not be undone
You are free
While I am not.

© phoebe180

Memories

"Sitting on this chair

Reminds me of our old affair

Have we ever been good friends

Or you meant more than a friend?


So many words left unspoken

Silent years have built the wall

Good memories I remember

Etched on my mind forever.


Those were the days

We had our highs of high

Confusing my hearts desire

Wanting me close to you all the time.


It was a secret love

With no commitments

A love left unreciprocated

A love that you never knew I felt.


There were days I dreamt about you

In dreams, I find fulfilment of you

Hoping to see you even in a glance

And make my heart wants to dance


I shiver at the sight of you

Your eyes follow me from a distance

Denying about this feeling inside

And let the chance of love passed us by.


And now as this moment reminds me of you

I wonder about you

Are you thinking about me too,

While you are sitting on a chair too."



© phoebe180

The First Kiss

When You Know

Lost Without You

Lost Without You

"I know I can be a little stubborn sometimes
A little righteous and too proud
I just want to find a way to compromise
Cos I believe that we can work things out

I thought I had all the answers never giving in
But baby since you've gone I admit that I was wrong

All I know is I'm lost without you I'm not gonna lie
How am I going to be strong without you I need you by my side
If we ever say we'll never be together and we ended with goodbye don't know what I'd do ...I'm
lost without you
I keep trying to find my way but all I know is I'm lost without you
I keep trying to face the day I'm lost without you

How am I ever gonna get rid of these blues
Baby I'm so lonely all the time
Everywhere I go I get so confused
You're the only thing that's on my mind

Oh my beds so cold at night and I miss you more each day
Only you can make it right no I'm not too proud to say

All I know is I'm lost without you I'm not gonna lie
How am I going to be strong without you I need you by my side
If we ever say we'll never be together and we ended with goodbye don't know what I'd do ...I'm
lost without you
I keep trying to find my way but all I know is I'm lost without you
I keep trying to face the day I'm lost without you

If I could only hold you now and make the pain just go away
Can't stop the tears from running down my face
Oh

All I know is I'm lost without you I'm not gonna lie
How am I going to be strong without you I need you by my side
If we ever say we'll never be together and we ended with goodbye don't know what I'd do ...I'm
lost without you
I keep trying to find my way but all I know is I'm lost without you
I keep trying to face the day I'm lost without you"

Waiting in Vain

Wait in Vain

"I dont wanna wait in vain for your love;
I dont wanna wait in vain for your love.
From the very first time I rest my eyes on you, girl,
My heart says follow trough.
But I know, now, that Im way down on your line,
But the waitin feel is fine:
So dont treat me like a puppet on a string,
cause I know I have to do my thing.
Dont talk to me as if you think Im dumb;
I wanna know when youre gonna come - soon.
I dont wanna wait in vain for your love;
I dont wanna wait in vain for your love;
I dont wanna wait in vain for your love,
cause if summer is here,
Im still waiting there;
Winter is here,
And Im still waiting there.
---
/guitar solo/
---
Like I said:
Its been three years since Im knockin on your door,
And I still can knock some more:
Ooh girl, ooh girl, is it feasible?
I wanna know now, for I to knock some more.
Ya see, in life I know theres lots of grief,
But your love is my relief:
Tears in my eyes burn - tears in my eyes burn
While Im waiting - while Im waiting for my turn,
See!

I dont wanna wait in vain for your love;
I dont wanna wait in vain for your love;
I dont wanna wait in vain for your love;
I dont wanna wait in vain for your love;
I dont wanna wait in vain for your love, oh!
I dont wanna - I dont wanna - I dont wanna - I dont wanna -
I dont wanna wait in vain.
I dont wanna - I dont wanna - I dont wanna - I dont wanna -
I dont wanna wait in vain.
No, I dont wanna (I dont wanna - I dont wanna - I dont wanna -
I dont wanna - I dont wanna wait in vain) -
No I - no I (I dont wanna - I dont wanna - I dont wanna - I dont
Wanna - I dont wanna wait in vain) -
No, no-no, i, no, I (I dont wanna - I dont wanna - I dont wanna -
I dont wanna - I dont wanna wait in vain) -
Its your love that Im waiting on (I dont wanna - I dont wanna -
I dont wanna - I dont wanna - I dont wanna wait in vain);
Its me love that youre running from.
Its jah love that Im waiting on (I dont wanna - I dont wanna -
I dont wanna - I dont wanna - I dont wanna wait in vain);
Its me love that youre running from."

Miss You More

Miss You More

"There are so many reasons that I find to run to you
Coz there's so little loving in my life, now I am away
And thinking about it I want things back how they used to be
There is no way around it, nothing good comes easily
So much between us and we both know that it's wrong
So I keep on waiting till I am back where I belong

Chorus
So here I am all by myself thinking of you nobody else
There is a feeling inside and as hard as I try it just won't go away
Are you finding it hard it all on your own
Having to face each night alone
Knowing you are the one with the love that I need
And I miss you more each day

So many feelings emotions running away with me
Cos it's you that I believe in and I love this one so deep
So much between us and we both know that it's wrong
Now I keep on waiting till I am back where I belong
Back where I belong

Chorus
So here I am all by myself thinking of you nobody else
There is a feeling inside and as hard as I try it just won't go away
Are you finding it hard it all on your own
Having to face each night alone
Knowing you are the one with the love that I need
And I miss you more each day

So I keep on waiting till I am back where I belong
Back where I belong

Chorus to fade
So here I am all by myself thinking of you nobody else
There is a feeling inside and as hard as I try it just won't go away
Are you finding it hard it all on your own
Having to face each night alone
Knowing you are the one with the love that I need
And I miss you more each day..."

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