ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel

The One For Me, Back in 1993

Updated on February 8, 2020
abbykorinnelee profile image

Bachelors Organizational Behavioral Psychology background in Autism, Mental Health, Buss. Psych. Divinely connected. Med Tech Nurse staffing

All Rights Reserved by Abigayle Malchow/abbykorinnelee
All Rights Reserved by Abigayle Malchow/abbykorinnelee
All Rights Reserved by:  Abigayle Malchow/abbykorinnelee
All Rights Reserved by: Abigayle Malchow/abbykorinnelee

My "The One That Got Away"

I was just beginning the roller coaster ride

learning exactly who I am,

or who I wanted to be.

I began to wonder

as nearly all of us must do,

who that boy would be

to make my heart feel new.

I was awkward in stature

outgoing and cute,

no one would look at me

the way I wished them to.

I marched in the band

I cheered on our team,

I wanted you to see me

You were my dream.

There was that bad perm

My wire frame glasses old people wear,

My eyes how they glittered

Off metal in my mouth So don’t stare!

I always made honor role

Earned my letter my freshman year,

Grades were always impeccable

So pops I would not fear.

Then there was one day

I saw him though he never saw me,

The boy who stole my heart

Moved in, back in 1993.

He had a brother and a sister

Both his parents to boot,

Mom and Dad divorced and remarried

I never had that stability, not even one root.

He had a basketball hoop

Dribbling that ball all morning,

I could hear him up in my room

I hoped it would never start storming.

He was the cutest boy I had ever seen

The memory still takes my breath away,

His hand the first I did hold

I prayed God would let him stay.

I used to laugh when he "just forgot"

We couldn't put to words what to say,

The notes we passed between us

I still have to this day.

We became quick friends

Who were never really apart,

Dated very briefly thus breaking

My fragile teenage heart.

He broke up with me in a note

That he wrote quickly in his high school class,

Rollerblading up to my front door

The note breaking up with me, not HIS ass.

The next four years we shared a bond

That couldn't ever seem to be broken,

My feelings were so overloaded

I buried them deep, down with the unspoken.

It wasn't long after I graduated

Of course he was there for me,

Never would I call where he would ignore

My best friend he became, that was the key.

We blossomed in our "relationship,"

for we never knew what it was called,

The passion was too intense

I needed time to stall.

We never did go further

As we both had wanted it to,

The deeper our feelings stemmed

Each level we reached was something new.

We were only 18 years old

No experience to compare,

Speechless to rush of emotions

That caught us both unaware.

After a intense and memorable night

When he stopped us from going too far,

He whispered he cared too much about me

But I just ran out to my car.

I felt in a frenzy over those words

I had waited six years to finally hear,

Now that I had laid in his arms

What he said caused me great fear.

I thought I did something wrong

That something was wrong with me,

For why did he make me wait so long

When all the time he had my heart for free.

I should have stopped to listen

To clarify what was meant by what he said,

He cared so much about me

Sex not what he wanted, it was me instead.

I didn't ever stop to think

That what he said was what he meant,

Never did I consider he knew I loved him

Instead off into the distance I went.

I never stopped to think when I walked away

To turn around and look back just one more time,

That when I walked away from what was meant to be

I did a disservice to us and maybe in time I'd be fine.

There is nothing I wouldn't have done

For the boy next door, my best friend

He was my "One that got away"

And when I left, in my life I started a trend.

I went through my life of heartaches

Failures of which are too many to divulge,

I was with way too many men, overcompensating

Now I live in loneliness and sex I do not indulge.

There was a reason for me to be single

For that I needed time and space,

I have always had this gut feeling

That the reason had a familiar face.

The last time I had seen him

Is implanted in my mind so clear,

I missed him so much it hurt sometimes

I wish I had let go of my fear.

I lied to myself and everyone I told

The guitarist was my first love is what I said,

The reality I should have acknowledged

If I had than my chances wouldn't be dead.

I always referred to the musician

As the first boyfriend I had ever had,

In reality my friend was first

And hiding it now looks pitiful and sad.

I never thought I would see a day

That we would have talked once more,

The internet has opened up new avenues

When I heard from him I nearly fell on the floor

He sent me a friend request you see

It has been nearly 16 years by now,

I stared at it in disbelief

Wondering if there was something wrong.

I must have been seeing things

That weren't really there,

I was confused as to why now

I had been the one that hadn't been fair.

He had been out with his friend

Someone we both had known,

He showed the friend my pictures

Of a time before we were all grown.

We caught up on our own lives

I learned a lot more about him,

Offering up my old friendship

Even those chances seemed dim.

I tried not to let those old feelings

Seep back into my heart,

I couldn't stop it from leaking

Back to where we had part.

He would probably just say hello

Than not talk to me at all,

With four hundred friends to keep up with

It will be easier to try and not fall.

I guess that I didn't think I would feel this way

When 16 years had gone by,

But how could I not when I remember

Those qualities inside him do lie.

I curse the woman that has hurt him

And myself for walking away,

I hate that I still can't express

How I much I really want him to stay.

I have thought about him every moment

since he up and walked back into my life,

How can I keep my old friendship

And never cause him anymore strife.

I may never have the nerve to ask him

To give me that one chance for u,

But his character is so rare and kind

A friendship and love, always feel new.

I remember how his lips used to feel

As I kissed him that long ago day,

The first time I had felt passion

That didn't just up and go away.

How do you tell someone something

You don't know if they will ever feel,

How do you make them understand

That whatever it was is still real.

I used to believe in meant to be

That he would be mine in the end,

I lost that belief when I left him

And I can't click a button to resend.

How do you tell your old best friend

He was the best thing that happened to me,

How do you tell him you love him

Is it possible he already does see?

All Rights Reserved By Author: Abigayle Malchow (abbykorinnelee) 2012

© 2012 Abby Rourk


This website uses cookies

As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at:

Show Details
HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the or domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)
ClickscoThis is a data management platform studying reader behavior (Privacy Policy)