Roshni – waiting for the miracle

Roshni, a forever-young vivacious girl! I have known her since forever. We have shared a love hate relationship. It took me the longest time to fully understand her. Nonetheless, we have been there for each other always. Looking back in retrospect, I may not have agreed with much of what she did in many ways, however I know that she has always had the best intentions irrespective of what may or may not have become.

Roshni, a girl forever in search of her one true love, and perpetually heart-broken! As long as I have known her, all she ever wanted to do was find her one true love and live happily ever after. She is like that, simple and uncomplicated. Things for her have always been black and white, love or hate. She says “grey is not a colour, it is just the presence of black in white in varying proportions, the darker the grey the lesser the white, the lesser the light!”

Roshni, a girl whose heart knew how to love and whose life’s purpose was to make everyone believe in love! She was born that way. The world used to label her as “mad” because they couldn’t understand the intensity, the depth or the emotions of what she wanted to convince them to believe. I remember in school she would say “If you believe in love strong enough, stay loyal and honest and don’t do anything wrong, keep yourself clean, you will get your love – “how?” is not your problem – miracles do happen!”

Roshni, ever so eager for her miracle to happen! At every disappointment crying painful tears and starting a fresh. She never gave up hope! Everyone thought she was a child and she needed to grow up. Nevertheless, she believed that children are the closest to nature and the natural instincts are the closest to the system of this universe. She’s always believed, “what you do, comes round to you!” Or “what you give is what you get!” So she insisted “Give love, with earnestness, passion and utmost devotion and you’ll get it back like a miracle waiting to happen!”

So she came across someone. He seemed like the one. She began ticking off characteristics or requirements from the “Mr. Perfect” list. It was a list of about 25 points and he seemed to have about 20. She declared, "Oh he’s got be the one, my heart will know." The time came to meet. With sweaty palms and a dry mouth they were finally face to face. But shockingly her heart declared “he’s not the one!” – NO NO NO! this can’t be, she was crying. So she decided not to listen to heart this one time and convince it that it’s wrong! 8 yrs down the line, she was crying again – convinced that her heart had told the truth after all!

She was broken. Her hope, - what hope? She had walls around her. She hid her pain behind her smile. Her pain was always only hers. She had a role to play, the only one she knew how to – to convince the world to believe in “love”. But the question was; did she still believe?

Yes she believed! But she just didn’t want to think about it. She didn’t want to think about her dreams, her aspirations, her hopes, her euphoria, her ‘the one’, her happily ever after. She just didn’t want to think about “ME”!

Her miracle arrived. He came ever so swiftly and swept her off her feet without her even stopping to wonder. He healed her in ways, only a miracle can. She was whole and new, with a renewed belief in love. The day came, they were to meet. She expected to feel jittery. She took her time getting dressed. Her heart was pounding, her legs felt week. Finally they were face to face. And then most extraordinarily, everything calmed down. Every cell in her body felt light and calm. Her heart screamed “he is the one – you’ve finally found him!” She smiled. It was as if she had finally come home.

I was stuck in a world of no love,
Waiting for a miracle to come my way.
Without the symbolic dove.
I only felt pain, agony, and dismay.

The situation was grave,
And my thoughts ran astray.
I said to myself, "be brave,
There will be another light, a ray!"

Then like an angel, unto me,
You were sent on a gloomy day.
Giving off light, so that I could see,
Thanking my Lord, I should pray.

For me, you're my euphoria, my hope,
Sent to flood my life with emotions at bay.
To give me strength to live, to cope.
You arrived just in time to save the day!