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Men and Women and Home Improvements

Updated on November 12, 2013

Home renovation

Laying out a new wooden floor
Laying out a new wooden floor
Finishing and painting
Finishing and painting
What on Earth did we get ourselves into this time?
What on Earth did we get ourselves into this time?

Men and Women and Home Improvements


A few years ago we had some contractors do some home improvement projects. We stripped the house down to the bare walls.


Spousal Questions

One day Debra turned to me with a puzzled look on her face.

After 25 years of marriage she still didn’t know how guys did things. She could not understand how a group of guys can suddenly turn to a project each taking a role, with very little said and get it done;

“Do you guys have a code?”

“How do you know what to do and when to do it?”

“Where did you learn these cool little tricks?”

“How do you guys know all this stuff?”

I had to put down my decoder ring and hide my instruction manual and explain that I really didn’t know anything at all. “Honest.”

Then I messaged the secret club and filed an incident report with a warning that the women were getting restless.

Really I don’t know. We just do. After years of doing these things it is easy to forget how you got that knowledge. I smiled because there was nothing to say - I had forgotten.

But Seriously Folks

Actually this stuff is passed on from various sources usually from necessity. Men and women either read up on the subject or look to other people for advice. We learn from people who have experienced this sort of thing whether it is cooking or hammering a nail. There is always someone willing to talk you through how something can be done. The real issue is separating the good advice from the bad.

It just so happens that there is a gender divide between what men and women tend to gravitate toward. There has been some blurring of that fine line. Men are only too happy to pass on their knowledge to women and women are often delighted with a man who can cook and clean or sew. My wife became a pretty accomplished electrician with my guidance. Soon she was telling me how I was doing it all wrong.

The only people who hide knowledge are those who stand to make a profit from it.

Still, we do guard with our lives the secret of which way to turn a screw.

Spousal Support

Who is in charge of the home improvement project?

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