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Ninja Remote: Someone Please Call the AskaNinja Guy!

Updated on July 31, 2007

I found this particular Ninja remote, and this tiny little device allows you to take control of any television. All you need to do is hit the mute, and the control is yours. I suppose that’s good for not only your TV, but televisions in bars or airports, the ones that you really want to change the channel or control the volume.

I couldn’t help but think WWAANS? That’s an acronym for What Would Ask A Ninja Say? So I imagined what would happen if he took the time to answer my question.

Mark Rollins from Washington asks a nin-ja: What do you think of the Ninja Remote?

“Uh, honestly, I’m a little offended. I mean, I’m always a little offended, because I’m a ninja. And we are always offended, or else we wouldn’t be so good at killing people!”

“First of all, ninjas don’t need remote controls, we are so fast we can be sitting there in front of the television and we’ll be flipping through channels faster than you see! Literally. Because when a ninja flips through channels, he just flips to the television and then flips back into his easy chair. Hiya! By the way, ninjas don’t have easy chairs, we are on our guard all the time, or else we could get killed watching Lost or some other show that’s non-ninja related.”

“Seriously, I look at ninja remote and I think, what is this? Well, it’s a Universal Remote obviously. So why did this company feel it needs to have the name of Ninja on it? First of all, This is an insult to the proud legacy of ninja!”

“I mean, does this company, who is also called Ninja Gizmos, really think that you can slap a ninja on their product and boost their sales? That’s right, Ninja Gizmos is not owned by actual ninjas. That’s right, I dug deep into the ninj-archives and found no trace of Ninja Gizmos. In fact, it is a trademark of Swamiware LLC, located in Ann Arbor, Michigan. Beware, Ann Arbor Michigan! A real ninja is coming to kill you soon!”

“By the way, if you want authentic ninja products, then you need to come to the ninja mart store. Just thought I’d throw that in, simply because we are discussing ninja products. Not because I need any money.”

Too bad I couldn’t get the real Ask a Ninja guy to do this product review. I would definitely insure more hits. In the meantime, I have this video.


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      Azreiel 5 years ago

      This remote kicks a$$!! I love to turn off all the tv's in Wal-Mart and best buy. It's fun in bars too!