ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel

Relationship Tip #5-Finance 101

Updated on September 24, 2008
radgirl profile image

Sunshine is a wife, mother of four, a relationship expert, a journalist, a photographer, a public speaker, and author.

Money Problems?

How often do you and your partner fight over money?

See results

One of the top five reasons more than half of all marriages end is bad finances. Either the responsibility is not shared because one person dictates them, or one person refuses to take them seriously. A relationship is a partnership. It can’t just be a partnership on some things, it has to be everything from raising the kids, to planning the week, to keeping the finances in check.

The first thing to do is create a budget, and the best way to do that is to hire a Financial Planner. Your Financial Planner can also act as your financial “mediator” if the two of you cannot agree on where the finances should go. S/he will help you set and achieve your goals, and hold you accountable for achieving them. Finances can be scary and overwhelming, and a Financial Planner can simplify the process.

Next, you need to communicate with each other. Make a rule that neither of you will spend more than twenty dollars on something without talking to each other about it first. Another good rule is if you don’t need it, start a fund for it, and save it up. Some times, by the time you have the cash saved up for what you want, you realize that you really didn’t want it in the first place, and that it would have been an impulse buy.

One person can’t make up all the rules and expect the other to be happy. On the other hand, one person can’t completely ignore financial responsibility. At least twice a week, the two of you need to sit down and take a look at the budget, whether you’re on track, and if something needs changing, decide together. Don’t manipulate each other to get your way. Listen to each other, and by listen, I don’t mean think about fifty other things while your partner is speaking to you.

Give yourselves an allowance, and stick to it. You will feel secure as a couple knowing your bills are getting paid, but if you have to scrimp every penny and don’t allow anything for yourselves, the bickering will start.

Cut up your credit cards. Today’s failing market is the result of people overspending and running up credit debt. Keep one with the lowest interest rate, and freeze it in a cube of butter in the freezer. It is for emergencies only, and the time it takes you to thaw it out may be enough time for you to realize that you don’t need it. Credit cards get more people in trouble and start more fights about money than they’re worth.

You may realize that you have to change your lifestyle. Live within your means. If you can’t afford it, don’t do it. It may mean that you can’t have that five dollar mocha every day, or that you don’t get to eat out twice a week, but it may mean that your bills will start dwindling down to nothing. Getting a second job should be the last resort. This only causes anguish and animosity from the one that has to work so many more hours.

Couples who save together stay together. Once you start seeing your savings account get fatter, you see your bills getting paid, and your vacation and Christmas gift fund growing, a lot of stress will be eliminated. Instead of having ten new pairs of shoes, your family can go on that trip to Disneyland you’ve been promising your kids for years. Break your savings up into percentages. You know you will have to fork out for things like school clothes, gifts, school supplies, and vacation. Designate a small percentage of your savings to these funds so that when the time comes, you aren’t forced to thaw out the butter covered emergency credit card.

Attack your debt. List your debts from largest to smallest. Pay extra on the smallest one every month until it’s gone. Then, start on the next one, using the money you were paying on the one you just paid off towards the one you’re attacking now, and so on, and so on.

Own your car. Get out from under that shiny little piece of the American dream that you’ve been chasing the Jones’ with. Your car will never be worth more than it was five minutes ago until you own it. Making payments is like giving a snake in a suit money every month just for being a snake. There’s nothing wrong with driving something a little older, and it feels good to get that title in the mail from the DMV saying that it’s yours.

They say money can’t buy happiness, but having financial stress out of the picture can save a marriage. Take steps to ensure that you don’t drown each other in debt, and when you’re old, retired, and living the good life, you’ll be thankful. There’s a famous quote that everyone should live by: Live like nobody so that later you can live like nobody else.


    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment

    • Libsmommy profile image


      10 years ago

      Agreed. I'm a strict planner and follow most of these, and it makes things so much easier.


    This website uses cookies

    As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

    For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at:

    Show Details
    HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
    LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
    Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
    AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
    Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
    CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the or domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
    Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
    Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
    Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
    Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
    ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)