ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel

The Honest Truth

Updated on January 20, 2009

Honest Truth

 “If it was a true friendship then the friend would understand.”  “Maybe it wasn’t a true friend after all.” “A real friend is one who walks in when the rest of the world walks out.” ----  These are the easy quips we hear from people reassuring us that friendships are worthwhile. They are an easy reassurance for people who only know one side of the story.

What if you knew I lied? I lied because I was hurt and angry at my friend for ignoring me. I made a split second decision that ruined a 15 year friendship. I cannot take it back without exposing myself to my world as the constant lies I have told in order to back up the very first lie.

One lie turned into another, that lie grew until finally my stories took a life of their own. The more people that got involved the bigger it became. I wanted to be the important person. I wanted to win this. I deserved to come out on top of this argument.

This fact is she ended the friendship. She did it so subtly that no one knew. It even surprised me. I led myself to believe I was honest and open with her. How dare she! I lost control and lashed out. By the flick of the keyboard I made the ending public, as I knew it would be eventually. People would have asked her why. She wouldn’t have told, she is polite that way. Which only would have stacked the deck against me when it came to the vote of public opinion. I hit her where I thought it would hurt the most. I acted quickly and spread the lies faster and better than I ever could have dreamed. I finally got to give her the what for she deserved.

it's been months and I try to ignore the conscience that eats away at me. My therapist tells me in order to make amends with my recovery it would involve coming clean and telling everyone the truth. I would have to expose myself to my family. These people believed in me when she abandoned me. My other lies would unravel. Lies that didn't even pertain to the friendship. My father would know how I lied for money. My mother would know what I really thought of her. I had told them how horribly she treated me and how she always looked down on me, like I was dirt on her shoe. I was never good enough. There was more. I spilled out everything. My mouth worked faster than my brain and I just couldn’t stop.

But…but? to let the truth out? This friend never did those things. She always stressed the importance of self respect. She wanted me to learn for myself and become independent. She gave me money to pay my bills, even though both of us knew that I would be spending it at the bar while she watched my children. My children. She was their mother while I neglected them. And yes, “neglect” is a word I would use. She was with me when I hit rock bottom over and over. And over some more.

I stopped when the police got involved. I tried to back pedal. The murmurs died down. I couldn’t let anyone know she had gone to the police. She knows the truth. And yet, she hasn’t said anything to any of our mutual friends. I hid my address and phone number. I have poisoned my children against her and her children. I know she has started legal action against me for the slander and libel. I hide as best as I can, but I know it will eventually catch up with me.I went too far.  I am now at a standstill for my recovery. I have a new boyfriend that I know isn’t good for me. I still don’t give my children the attention they deserve. I have a dead end job going no where. My life was not like this with her as a friend.  Do I still deserve any of those quips on friendships? How if she were a true friend she'd understand and forgive me? Now what if I were to say that wasn’t really my side of the story?

Just a small reminder that you can't believe everything you read on the internet :)


    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment

    • jellygator profile image


      6 years ago from USA

      Very creative and thought-provoking hub. Love it!

    • Ryan-Palmsy profile image

      Ryan Palmer 

      7 years ago from In a Galaxy far, far away

      Great hub! Not sure whether or not to believe the story or not though!

    • Dottie1 profile image


      9 years ago from MA, USA

      Good point! That's the honest truth:)

    • crazymomma of4 profile image

      crazymomma of4 

      9 years ago

      Absolutely!! Great HUb!!

    • moonlake profile image


      9 years ago from America

      That's for sure!!!!!!!


    This website uses cookies

    As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

    For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at:

    Show Details
    HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
    LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
    Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
    AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
    Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
    CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the or domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
    Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
    Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
    Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
    Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
    ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)