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Buy Horses Online

Updated on November 10, 2012

Horse Shopping

Not all of us have a horse, but when the need arises to form a posse and chase down those bank robbin' varmints a horse comes in really handy. Never try to win the Kentucky Derby without a horse. We're here to help. What follows is a mostly comprehensive list of equine supplies, accoutrement, gear, tchotchkes, and novelties. Don't be left in the barn when all your friends gallop off for a spirited game of horse polo.

Accoutrements Horse Head Mask

If you're reading this, you're probably not a horse, but that can be somewhat remedied. This handy horse head mask boasts high-tech latex technology and extreme anatomical correctness. The unblinking eyes are enough to startle even the most ardent equine admirers. It would be a great thing to wear to your wedding. You'll be the hit of your Halloween party or National Velvet reenactment.

Horse Riding Crop

Horse racing is exciting and fun. You wouldn't actually hit your horse but you do need something to hold along with your health insurance card. This riding crop clearly signals to your mount that you mean business and you just might ponder the remote possibility of considering a gentle flick. Any mostly intelligent horse gets your message pretty quickly and will run with all of its friends while carrying you on its back.

Horses Peel and Stick Wall Decals

Peeling and sticking a real horse to your wall could be problematic. Consider instead this colorful analog. Feel free to adhere them to walls, ceilings, barns, stalls, trailers, and computer monitors. Made from colorful materials that are sticky on one side and smooth on the other, they remove easily should you change your mind when your horse runs away.

Horse Wine Bottle Holder

Honestly, we have no idea. We are so sorry.

Sometimes an item appears on Amazon that defies common sense but still ships for free. Rather than serving up pithy marketing verbiage, we quietly move on to an endearing Barbie Doll with horse.

Barbie Doll and Tawny Horse Playset

Barbie represents the epitome of girly achievement, and she has a horse too. She's been an astronaut, scientist, bond trader, lawyer, skier, yogurt manufacturer, and virtually every other white-collar uber-achiever that fits into society's modern narrative of feminine equality. She also has a horse. The horse is called Tawny. Adorable Tawny never leaves her side unless she is called away to thwart a hostile takeover attempt from Bain Capital. Plan to spend many enjoyable hours playing with this doll, horse, brush saddle, riding hat, and more.

Puzzle of Pari-Mutuel Betting

Most of your friends probably already have a jigsaw puzzle of people making bets on horses, but just in case one person spilled chocolate milk on their copy, here's a place to order another one.

The supply of jigsaw puzzles depicting one cadre of sentient humans giving money to other sentient humans in the hope of increasing the liquid assets of the original set of sentient humans may be more limited than most of us might imagine. If you can't get to the track and your county prohibits consorting with bookies, order at least one of these fascinating puzzles to while away the hours until your assistance check arrives.

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    • drbj profile image

      drbj and sherry 

      5 years ago from south Florida

      Your selection of equine novelties is admirable, nicomp, as are your unrivaled, pithy descriptions of same. I won't rest until I acquire that indescribable horse wine holder. What a conversation piece! Thank you, thank you.

    • psychicdog.net profile image

      psychicdog.net 

      5 years ago

      Giggling all the way through Nicomp! And a timely read as I just recently 'purchased' a cadre of horses - I bet a trifecta on the Melbourne Cup a famous horse race in Australia - but despite my substantial outlay a horse called Green Moon I didn't invest in put me out of the $50k winnings!

    • nicomp profile imageAUTHOR

      nicomp really 

      5 years ago from Ohio, USA

      Wayne Brown : Thank you for your kind words. I, too, was pleasantly surprised by the veritable plethora of potential equine acquisitions.

    • Wayne Brown profile image

      Wayne Brown 

      5 years ago from Texas

      You have really opened up my world on horses...no longer will I be in the dark as to where to secure a horse on short notice. I am quite partial to the horse which acts as a wine bottle rest...it is the essence of culture for the true horse lover on your gift list although I must admit horse-related items appear to be rather pricey...with the exception of the horse-head mask of course....a fine gift for those of the Italian heritage I am sure. Leave it in their bed for the big surprise! Lots of fun here...thanks for sharing...voted UP! ~WB

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